I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: F.A.Q. (Frequently Asked Questions) => Topic started by: Lori1851 on April 16, 2007, 03:59:26 PM
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Hello,
I have a ? Do alot of you on dialysis suffer from depression? My son seems to be having a hard time. Just curious if any of you take any antidepressants? Also, how about the "NO SMoking"? Thought he had quit but come to find out he has cheated some. This is not a good thing cause he just had his transplant evaluation.
Lori mom to Dustin 21
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Depression effects everyone different. Kidney disease and the struggles for some people on dialysis is a very real denominator. Hope your son adjust in time but until he does depression will rear it's ugly head. Just try to be understanding and keep him interested in the things he likes to do.
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Yes, it does effect everyone differently, i can be as happy as can be and at the drop of a hat, (especially a commercial with joy or someone hurting or any animal happy or sad, i dont care if it is a cat food commercial) i am bawling like a baby. You try and be as happy as you can on the outside but the inside knows better, i know mine does, and what is bad is what i just said, it releases at the most damndest times, lol, i am not currently on any meds cuz my insurance does not cover anything in that field, grrrrrrr, so for now, i just try and grin and bear it, but to be honest, since i have gotten my kitty, everything i used to worry about, i dont anymore, i just let my kitty walk all over me in bed and we just cuddle and purr and she bites the hell out of me :P but i love her anyways gosh darnit,
About the smoking, i was told they can test you for as far as 3 months back to see if you have any tobacco in your system, that is what my social worker told me, i have not yet quit, i smoke 1 cigarette a day, sometimes even none, but even that 1 cigarette i just cant give up, i know my day is coming to an end after i have that cigarette, and all is well, (for now that is) :P Good luck to you and Dustin :cuddle;
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Hubby has trouble with depression, anxiety and panic attacks on times. Like Goofynina said it just rears its head at times. He finds it helps if he keeps busy. He finds winter the worst. I keep telling him I think he has SADS(seasonal affective disorder).
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Yes, as mentioned before keeping busy and doing the things you like can take your mind off things. Just a walk can work wonders. My little dog keeps me going from dawn to dusk. As far as smoking, I still have 4 a day, but I don't know how it affects transplant evaluation. Hope everything works out for him.
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my husband is lucky- he quit smoking a year ago- but he also does suffer from depression and anxiety. He is on meds for both- they offered them many times before he took them, they said its very common for anyone who has such a life altering event such as beginnig dialysis, to suffer from depression.
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yes i get depressed a lot of the time...well actually most of the time.. about the smoking part i wouldnt know because i dont smoke...but hope everything works out alright
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Hi Melissa, Welcome to ihatedialysis.com. Can you please go to the introduce yourself section and tell us a little about yourself? That would give us the opportunity to formally welcome you to our wonderful community. Thank you..
Goofynina/Admin.
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Its strange when you feel depressed because you know how you are feeling ,but cant do anything about it. I am also finding now that i am getting the anxiety and panic setting in . One thing i have found over here when you mention it to the medical staff is that they are just not interested if you feel depressed, no one will prescribe meds for it. You just get told to 'think positive' ...about what ???? I'm sure none of us want that big black cloud hanging over us . ::)
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Depression is normal. Give him time to come out of it. If HE wants to try meds thats fine but don't press the issue. Same goes with the smoking. Don't press it, don't focus on it. When the time comes and he sorts out his priorities he will give up smoking or at least express that he wants to give it up. My gateway out of depression started out with 4 months of "time" (the time was a necessity) and then a new hobby, building a r/c car-truck. Working on the hobby gave my mind some time off and I liked it. Since, I have been more socially active and started back at work part-time. It surely is a difficult time and difficulty to deal with, just try to be patient and the caring mom you are.
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I get the blues quite often, and anxiety also. My medical team is giving me some meds for the anxiety but I have to wait to get an appointment for the blues..... :(
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I'm loosing it and i've been loosing it before dialysis started. i started on dialysis 11/06 and never stopped smoking or drinking, in fact i'm sipping on some vodka/water and smoking now.
I'm battling with two voices in my mind all the time, what i should do verses what i wind up doing.
isolating myself more and becoming more of a loner except when i go to treatment. i get there and feel so vibrant and refreshed until you want to know anything about me then i shut down.
my few friends and family hardly see me anymore, partly because my license is suspended for minor traffic violations, i call them (profile stops that work). I was reading in the bible the other day and there were a few passages i believe God was revealing again to me. the passage basically said, obey all Government and Local Laws they are ordained by God even though some ungodly people work for the Government, the laws of the land are designed for order.
the other part of me is still dealing with condemnation and i know that's not from God. Very hard to shake it off me.
I see a major part of my depression in my mind all the time. It's revealed to me all the right ways of doing everything and i do the opposite then i get angry at myself again and get deeper into my depression.
Who will deliver me from me. I always give God the chance to perform Grace on me but the enemy fights me in my mind all the time.
I strongly believe God has something major in store for me once i get past this depression of mine.
I even put my phone ringer on mute, cancel church appointments, men's group meetings, and dates.
any suggestions for me?
EDITED: Fixed Bold Prompt - Sluff/ Admin
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There are times when all you can do is stand there and wonder if you are going to lose your mind when you are a dialysis patient. The diet, the fluid restrictions, the treatments day in and day out just seem to blend together into one montonous crazy life. Be sure your son has some fun sometimes. Let it go and go ride a roller coaster, or go bike riding, or walking. Have him write or do art projects. Or just be himself for a few minutes. Do not judge him when he is down and out in his mind. Dialysis is HARD!
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I'm loosing it and i've been loosing it before dialysis started. i started on dialysis 11/06 and never stopped smoking or drinking, in fact i'm sipping on some vodka/water and smoking now.
I'm battling with two voices in my mind all the time, what i should do verses what i wind up doing.
isolating myself more and becoming more of a loner except when i go to treatment. i get there and feel so vibrant and refreshed until you want to know anything about me then i shut down.
my few friends and family hardly see me anymore, partly because my license is suspended for minor traffic violations, i call them (profile stops that work). I was reading in the bible the other day and there were a few passages i believe God was revealing again to me. the passage basically said, obey all Government and Local Laws they are ordained by God even though some ungodly people work for the Government, the laws of the land are designed for order.
the other part of me is still dealing with condemnation and i know that's not from God. Very hard to shake it off me.
I see a major part of my depression in my mind all the time. It's revealed to me all the right ways of doing everything and i do the opposite then i get angry at myself again and get deeper into my depression.
Who will deliver me from me. I always give God the chance to perform Grace on me but the enemy fights me in my mind all the time.
I strongly believe God has something major in store for me once i get past this depression of mine.
I even put my phone ringer on mute, cancel church appointments, men's group meetings, and dates.
any suggestions for me?
EDITED: Fixed Bold Prompt - Sluff/ Admin
You took the first step by joining this site. I know it's hard at first but once you get comfortable with leaving posts, then try the chat room once in awhile. Thanks for being honest because that is so important on this site. We all are becoming a family, we call it our IHD family. You are now apart of this family. We look forward to your involvement. In the mean time the Bible is a good place to read.
I hope your membership here helps you in ways you least expect it.
Sluff
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:welcomesign; Duane, glad you joined the community! Most of the emotions you have involving dialysis are the same as the rest of us... We deal with them one day at a time, just like you do. Don't get down on yourself, you are only human and we all make wrong decisions. Again, one day, one issue at a time and it is easier~ Just like how you eat an elephant (so to speak) one bite at a time! Concentrate on the one good decision you made for yourself today and pat yourself on the back. Then tomorrow do the same, only try to double the good decisions...before you know it you will be making all the right choices and feeling good about yourself. It is worth it, YOU are worth it! We are all here for you. :grouphug;
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Please don't take this the wrong way but if someone suggested for me to go to an amusement park and ride rollercoasters a month ago (while experiencing severe depression) I would have told them to go and jump off a bridge. I think I understand that suggesting physical and fun activities can be helpful but not if the depression is severe and the individual show no interest. Finding someone just to talk to and listen to you helps. Writing is a good idea but I doubt you should "have him" do anything. It is a very delicate situation and things usually get worse before getting better. There is a saying - You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. When Dustin is thirsty he will find water, in the mean time you just need to be there for him when HE wants/needs you. He is 21 years old not 12. Treat him like a man and he will find his way. He will let you know somehow if he needs something. People have a basic will to live so at least give him ample time to do things his way before trying top take over and save him. I doubt he needs to be saved.
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Duane, I had a thought that worked to help lift me from some of the depression I was/am experiencing. I have spent quite a bit of time with my friends 2 year old boy. Being around him and playing cars with him has been very uplifting and has helped give me a reason to press on. Maybe you could become involved in your church/community with some young people. Life at their age is refreshing. There are always children who need a person in their life to care about them and this is a relationship where everybody comes out a winner. There are benefits for you and for the young people. Maybe you could volunteer at the Y or something like that. Christian may only be 2 but he is a wonderful friend. If I don't come around for a couple of days he asks his daddy "where is George?" and that is a feeling that is priceless. I don't ever want to not be there for him. Keep your head up brother.
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George, thanks for the uplifting message and i will keep my head up. spending time with various groups of people is the right thing to do.
Anja, glad to know i'm not in this alone. one issue at a time & concentrating on good decisions is good advise thanks. i'll try to be here for everyone as you are here for me also.
Sluff, thanks and thanks for including me into this family.
When i feel comfortable to be open, i will truly be open with life issues concerning me, i don't like to hold them inside me. i just have to be careful where i open up. :thx;
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Hubby is also experiencing anxiety/depression. When he was the hospital they took him off of Effexor which he had been taking for a few years for depression. Said it might contribute to his high blood pressure. They were supposed to prescribe something before he left the hospital but they did not.
Spoke to the PD nurse today , she told us to call his primary Dr. because the Neph Dr. won't be in till Wed.
He is really anxious so called his primary.
So, wondering if anyone on PD is taking particular anxiety drug?
Thanks
Joannie
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Joannie, I am taking Lexapro for anxiety, at this point. That's all I'm taking,
so far it's helping with my anxiety, but necessarily the depression. It's a start.
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Myss Anne, thanks so much for your reply.
I'll at least have something to go on, if the Dr. ever calls back.
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Lori, I was wondering how Dustin is doing.
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My husband also suffers from depression and anxiety since his accident five years ago...not related to the kidneys......now he is confident and what is so ironic is that I am the one depressed being the fact that he may need dialysis.......
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One thing i have found over here when you mention it to the medical staff is that they are just not interested if you feel depressed, no one will prescribe meds for it. You just get told to 'think positive' ...about what ???? I'm sure none of us want that big black cloud hanging over us . ::)
Depression is real for everyone, some just don't know they have it. Depression is what you talk to your Social Worker, Nephrologist or family doctor to assist you with med's.
I'm slowly turning my depression into an assett and think positive about my depression like dialysis. I throw hints of forgetfulness and withdrawls with family and close friends so they will slowly adjust to understanding me more. i'm finding when they don't know something is wrong and just see my responses unfavorable to them, now they can casually think back and understand the present about me better.
As a result my youngest sister is starting to understand my depression better and is learning to deal with me better, this she will share with her kids.
It's a positive.
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Good for you Duane, even a little positivity is good for our souls. Keep on keepin' on :2thumbsup;
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I find that if i think about the future a lot, what I need to do, what is possible and likely for me, and remember the past, what I used to do, how I used to be, that I can easily fall into depression and anxiety. I refuse to take meds for it. I am taking more meds now than I ever thought I would, and I know of too many that have become addicted to anti-depressants.
Remembering and honouring the good things I have, my kids, wife and friends, my ability to drum and play guitar, and remembering that kidney disease is not necessarily a death sentence like cancer or aids, and is a different journey for all of us, helps to bring me back to a more peaceful mindset.
In the ancient tradition of zen, the greatest achievement is in developing a state of inner peace through accepting 'not knowing.' None of us really know what is going to happen tomorrow, or even later today! None of us, and no one on the planet knows what happens when we die, IF we die.
Opinions and beliefs abound, but really NO ONE KNOWS!
So why be worried about what we can't know?
Live
Love
Laugh
~LL~
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Is hard sometimes thinking about the future. The treatment day-in and day-out and the tiring feeling are hard.
I think it is hard to keep going on if you do not have a support group to move you along the way. I suffered silence depression for many years unoticed when I was on dialysis. I became very quiet and not as vocal due to my energy level.
I think what keep me going is seeing my nephews and nieces grow up. I feel more self-worth when they are around.
Keep fighting everyone.
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I have been told i am a depressed person. I am 51 and i have had my share of anti depressing meds. I have also been i the hospital for it. I think all i need is to forget the things that made me feel this way. There are so many things that have happened to me some are my choices some are not. I seem to accept the things i do wrong. I can look at them and say that was stupid. The other things that i don't have control over are i guess what i need help in. Perhaps they are telling me the wrong thing. I feel like i am reacting to a action the only way my body knows how.
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Now I have a question, can KD cause depression in patients prior to having dialysis and then they feel better once they get dialyzed?
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Now I have a question, can KD cause depression in patients prior to having dialysis and then they feel better once they get dialyzed?
I think it is the thought itself of having this disease puts us in a depression, and then to add fluid restrictions, that stupid renal diet :banghead; and the loss of jobs, homes etc... that all brings depression, but in time, as you learn to deal with it, it does get a little better. Having a great support group such as everyone here on IHD has been a Godsend for me and i hope you find we are here for you too Tweety. Hang in there girlfriend and remember, we are just a keyboard away :grouphug;
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Now I have a question, can KD cause depression in patients prior to having dialysis and then they feel better once they get dialyzed?
I think it is the thought itself of having this disease puts us in a depression, and then to add fluid restrictions, that stupid renal diet :banghead; and the loss of jobs, homes etc... that all brings depression, but in time, as you learn to deal with it, it does get a little better. Having a great support group such as everyone here on IHD has been a Godsend for me and i hope you find we are here for you too Tweety. Hang in there girlfriend and remember, we are just a keyboard away :grouphug;
First off, thank you for your hugs and very kind words....all of you have been very supportive, now one of the reasons for my absence was he was going through the bad emotional and mental changes of this whole thing and he needed me by his side......
When we were first told of this, my reaction was complete anxiety and depression and here I was not giving much thought to whether my husband was going though it other than the fact that he complained of his food and fluid restrictions...he loves these kinds of foods that KD patients cannot have and he loves his sodas and coffees and teas.....he also loves chocolate...worst thing for KD patients.......he loves dairy products too (yes, he is a wine and cheese connaisure lol....) and the "bad" list goes on.....everything was taken from him a few months ago and now he has been having this bad depression and anxiety where I have come to terms with the whole thing......
I am just hoping once he starts dialysis he will feel better and get out of the rut....
I can certainly see how KD patients lose homes, jobs, and even their families.....
:cuddle;
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Joanie, any word from the doctor? Is your husband on something now?
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I suffered from depression so badly when my husband passed away so i can surely relate
to people with it. It is hard to cope with. I remember laying in bed and seeing daylight
coming in around the window thinking how a new day was coming and how I dreaded
facing another day. I was severely depressed. One month I took prozac but broke how
it hives all over and ended up in er. I still don't know if it was prozac or stress but I never
took anymore. And the prozac was strange. I would feel like crying but couldn't. It probably would have just delayed
my pain. Anyway, as time went on, my little grandson came along and it was like a little light came on.
It does get better and at the time I couldn't believe that it would. I sometimes feel tho that my
health is so bad today because of the severe depression I went through. Depression is a hitchhiker always looking
for a ride but I hope I pass it up always. After I became really ill recently I was in a struggle to survive and
did not have space for depression. Now I am so glad to still be here and want to enjoy the good moments
as they become available. Now I appreciate life and want to enjoy it to the utmost. I am still limited because
of my foot but I surely have a different attitude then I did.
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I don't believe in anti--depressants....
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I've suffered from depression for a long time, but it has definitely been worse since I found out I'd have to start dialysis. The thought of being hooked up to a machine in order to live has really affected me. However, what I've found helps ME is to just stay busy. I can't work because my anemia is so bad it makes it impossible to work an 8 hour day. I've basically been staying home and the boredom is part of what gets me down. When I stay busy I think less about my condition and more about getting on with my life. I busy myself with my hobby and cleaning and it helps tremendously.
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I have been on paxil for over a year. It helps with the depression, but what helped me the most was therapy. I had really good insurance at the time and it paid for me to go talk to some one once a week. She made me examine why I was feeling so depressed and a lot of it was due to all or nothing thinking. I would reccomend therapy to exeryone.
I still get depressed some times, but it doesn't last as long or get as dark.
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On Larry King this eve. the guests are people who survived near fatal accidents.
They are an encouragement to hear how they dealt with depression, etc.
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I am currently taking 20 mg of Prozac to deal with my adjustment disorder. I noticed how different it is with prozac, I don't get as sad or angry as I used to and can cope much easier. I used to be ashamed that I needed a pill to help me deal, but I know now that t's nothing to be ashamed of, and am glad I'm part of the 'Prozac Nation'. :thumbup;
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Good job, Karen! :2thumbsup; Too many people put up with feeling depressed and don't take action. Depression can actually be worse for the patient than their disease. It's a shame all doctors are not aware of how common depression is in the chronically ill, and if they do notice they so often do not take it seriously. >:(
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I am not sure I understand when someone says they don't believe in anti-depressents. Does that go for all medications? If you need an antibiotic, would you not take it? Depression is not something you can just shake off and get happy. There are real chemical imbalances that need help. I will do anything to feel as close to normal as I can. I take meds for blood pressure - isn't that the same as taking something for depression or anxiety? Karen, it is hard to get over the stigma others put on Prozac, Paxil, Zoloft, but they are made to help us and I for one am a better me because of the medication. Glad you are feeling better with the med.
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I have been on paxil for over a year. It helps with the depression, but what helped me the most was therapy. I had really good insurance at the time and it paid for me to go talk to some one once a week. She made me examine why I was feeling so depressed and a lot of it was due to all or nothing thinking. I would reccomend therapy to exeryone.
I still get depressed some times, but it doesn't last as long or get as dark.
I have wondered if anyone with KD has had regular therapy sessions.
I would be shocked if most people with KD, whether pre-dialysis or on dialysis, didn't suffer from depression. Being a social worker is different from being a licensed psychologist, and I often wonder if it wouldn't be a great idea if a team of psychologists could be made available at dialysis clinics, just like nutritionists, et al. The emotional and psychological effects of CKD seem to be widely ignored by health care providers.
I'm sure I suffer from depression, and I'm not even on dialysis yet. A lot of it is just simple fear. CKD is so unpredictable. I have FSGS, and I don't know what caused it or what will happen next. It is not something that will ever be cured. A transplant is no cure; it is only a treatment, and dialysis isn't even as good as a transplant.
And I'm angry. I don't know what I did to deserve this fate, and it makes me furious that I am having to suffer for no apparent reason whatsoever. I have people who depend upon me...an autistic son, an elderly mother, a new husband, so how am I supposed to care for all of these people when I am hooked up to some monstrosity? It makes me so mad that I can hardly see straight.
I do try to keep myself distracted. I have no real support team locally (I am fairly new to this community, and my husband's family has not been exactly welcoming, but that's another story). So, I figure that I have to find my own way out of this black hole. I've started volunteering at the local hospital; that's not easy for me as I am basically a very shy person, but I want to keep my mind and soul active. I've started learning to play the guitar. I'd like to try some new things, but I am afraid of making a commitment because I don't know how much longer I have before having to "commit" to dialysis.
I have learned that most people live with some searing pain in their lives. Just today, one of the people I volunteer with told me that her only child, her son, who is studying/living in Europe has found a lump in his groin, and the working theory is that he has leukaemia. What a horror! Her only child, so far away, possibly facing cancer. He can't be treated here in the US because he has no insurance (he gets state supported care overseas from their national health system), so my friend is in a right state! Her story made me realize that terrible things happen to people every day, and while that does not make me feel less depressed, it does make me realize that time really is precious, and I loathe wasting it in a depressed state. I'm determined to find as much joy in my life as I can, and I am equally determined to take as much control over my life as I possibly can.
As for anti-depressants, if they help, take them. There is no honor in suffering if you do not have to. Suffering does not make you a better person; it only makes you a more depressed person.
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Moosemom, i hope you find something that helps you with your depression, i know you have said your not on dialysis yet but when i was on Hemo, i was severly depressed (damn near suicidal) :P but now that i am on PD, life has a new meaning to me, at least if i go back to hemo, i know what to expect. I also know there are other means of dialysis for me and i have options, that eases my mind as well. I hope all the best for you and i have to say for myself, coming here has helped me more than any pill could ever do. IHD is my method of therapy, here, they all know how I feel, what i am going through and they remind me i am not alone. So Please, come as often as you can, get your feelings out here, we are here for you and WE CARE!!!! :grouphug;
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Thanks for that, Goofynina. I'm sure my post echoes those of many, many people who have visited IHD.
When you speak of "other means of dialysis" and other options for you, what do you mean? "Options" is not a word that I freely associate with renal disease! LOL!
Thanks.
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Well, instead of Hemo, there is NxStage and/or Home Hemo, I am leaning towards NxStage more. I wouldnt mind it as much if i could do it at home, and that makes me feel better just knowing that. :clap; (but i am still hoping and praying that my peritoneum holds out a long long long long long long long long long time) ;) :) :yahoo;