Yes... this is a rant

[Brightsky69]

OMG!!  I just got something like six text messages in a row from a family member asking for me to wire them $100. This person claims they “might” have skin cancer. So they said to get the results of their biopsy they need $100.00 and their disability won’t pay for it. WHATEVER!  This person has been on disability for headaches. This persons father even told me that the only thing wrong with them is they are spoiled.
I am on my 2nd  kidney transplant …spent two years on dialysis and still carried my a$$ to work everyday. I never had my hand out to family members for cash...ever. This person hasn’t worked in 8 or 9 years and yet has the nerve to ask me for money??

[sullidog]

I feel ya, I'm having the same issue, only it's not a family member, it's a fellow dialysis patient!

[Brightsky69]

dog - I don't know...maybe it's just me. Even if I had no medical issues I still would be pissed. I WORK for what I need and want. It just seriously gets under my skin when people who don't work but are capable of working have their hand out.
I can understand if you have serious medical issues and can't work. But you have to have some serious balls to ask a person who has been thru and still has life threatening medical problems for cash....and you don't work nor want to work.

How are you dealing with it?

[MooseMom]

This has given me an idea for a new thread...

[Jean]

Bright Sky, I am with you!!!! Fortunately for me, my health has always been good ( well until 3 years ago) but anyways, I raised my kids on my own, did all my housework and yard work and never ever asked for a handout. Yet, I still had "friends" who would ask to borrow money from me so they could have a vacation. This same friend already owed me money!!! I guess because I worked hard and did without to raise my kids, that means I need to take care of some one else? Not a chance. Keep your money, you earned it.
( charity is another whole story )

[Poppylicious]

Wow!  I completely agree with your reasons for ranting (and I do love a good rant!)

But on a side-note, if you have a biopsy do you really have to fork out money before they give you the results?  That seems so wrong.

[Brightsky69]

Poppy - I think it was a BS story to get some sympathy & to get in my wallet. It makes no sense to me....

[jbeany]

Total BS - the bill is handled completely separate from the clinical results.

[Brightsky69]

I sent an email basically saying I have my own bills to pay. This person tried this the last time around Christmas....couldn't get their prescription meds then. Then they needed around $200. Of course I said NO back then too.

What got me was, we in the family had just gotten a dividend check for $500. We usually get it around Christmas time. This person told me they were going to take their check and spend some of it at the casino.  Ha Ha Ha
Then a few weeks later they are asking me for $200.
I don't think so!!

[Chris]

I'm glad I do not know any family members and they do not know my cell or emails, and possibly home address. I think if they had that info, I might get a text like yours Brightsky snd I do ot even like that side of the family.

[Riki]

I have an exboyfriend who does that from time to time.  The last time he did it, I got a text while I was in dialysis.  He was asking me for $20 because he needed to get to Nova Scotia for something.  His family lives there, as does most of mine, but I don't know what his reason was.  As it was, I was leaving for Nova Scotia that evening too, and going to New York the next day, so I couldn't spare it.  He got rather angry with me, but it wasn't my problem.

[Brightsky69]

To me it's like asking someone who is on their death bed....Hey can I have all your stuff when you die.  Unbelievable!! 

[Chris]

I agree with that statement Brightsky!

[Chris]

By the way can I have a $20 from all of you?  I'm trying to go to Vegas! 

[Brightsky69]

  Chris!  The only person I'd give money too is my mom. And even then I'll ask "What's it for??"

[Brightsky69]

The cousin is at it again.   
She sent me a text saying "Hey how are you? I am not doing well, I am in such pain!!!!! like nothing I have experienced before in my life....but I can't afford the pain medication."
Translation: give me money!! 

[jbeany]

Tell her that meditation helps.  She needs to go somewhere quiet, far away from all electronic devices and simply breathe deeply.  It makes pain go away.

Just don't tell her that when she does it, the pain that's going away is her, from you.   

[Brightsky69]

 
I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."

[rsudock]

Chris!  The only person I'd give money too is my mom. And even then I'll ask "What's it for??"

you are a good daughter...me on the other hand my mom asked me for money to go to Italy and wanted me to put it on my credit card...I was like "hell no!"

I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."

LOVE THIS! 


Maybe send her a bottle of sunblock to stop any future problems!!!

xo,
R

[Wenchie58]

WOW!  This hit close to home!  Our area had major flooding last week and three of my neices were evacuated from their apartments in a nearby town.  I offered (via facebook) to help them with anything they needed.  A sister(I have many, this one has been drawing off the government for years) texted asking for money because she had overdrawn her checking account.  Note: she was not flooded.  She calmly asked for 400....I sent 200.  She FREAKED...tore up the check, said she would never ask me for anything again.  Tonight she joined FB on her new computer and friend requested me.  Hmmmm...I don't think angry quite describes my feeling right now!  GRRRRRR!
This girl is 10 years younger than I, perfectly healthy.  Yes, I have a new kidney....but even that doesn't quite make me Superwoman....OR rich.  Does make me smart enough to never write a check again!

[sullidog]

the same lady I mentioned in my other post got her utilities shut off, but claims she got a 200,000 settlement from an accident and won 15,000 from a gamble, but still you still got your utilities turned off? and then you buy pizza for the whole unit last week? and still you ask patients for money and food? I really don't get some people. I believe this lady has the ability to work.
Also I know a patient with diabetes who doesn't work, but I personally feel that he could, maybe it's just me but I feel well enough to work so I work, and I feel that no matter what disease you have if you feel well enough to work, then do it! Just because you have a disease does not mean you should take advantage of the government, if you feel half way desent, then quit sittin around!

[Riki]

I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."

I would have.  I make it very clear on facebook whenever someone in my family posts one of those thingies that say "repost this if you know someone one who.." how bitter I am by replying to them with "people like that would probably like something a little more tangible than a useless facebook post"   Not many of them talk to me anymore. *L*

[Brightsky69]

I pretty much ignored her after her last text. She has been on "disability" (so she says) for something like 5 years yet no official diagnosis from any doctor to attest to what might be wrong with her.
My guess is she is just living off her parents.
I want to tell her Get off your lazy ass and go get a job.

[The Noob]

we have actually had some ask for money stating that because DH didn't work (no gas, uniforms, meals) and he was on SSD, that we must be rolling in the dough..?

before he got sick, our joint income was about 70K a year. after Dx, we're lucky to break 20K, and we still have all the bills and debt and probably much more so with all thats associated.

my 22 yr old pregnant daughter pulls down 12+ hour shifts at a nursing home with a typical patient load of 16-19.
he fiance works 50+hrs as a cook and walks/busses there and back (5 miles) if she is at work and can't drive him.

i went to see her few weeks ago. stopped at the dollar store to grab them a small crock pot. man standing outside at the door (about 350lbs) asks me for money. i said nope. he starts whining that he has to get on the bus and go to a location that is 2 miles away. i said well dude better get walking.
my other daughter is in between old cars and walks/rides bus everywhere. says exercise is good. saving money for next old junker.

[Brightsky69]

My cousin is my age...no kids. No responsibilites what so ever. Must be nice to be able to sit at home and sleep all day.

Her text word for word:
Hey cuz! How r u doing? I hope well! I’m not doing so well. I’ve been in bed 4 about 2 weeks. I need a medication but can’t afford it. I won’t have $$ til October some time so I’ve just been layin in bed in excruciating pain. IT SUCKS! I haven’t been in pain like this b4. I hope all is well w/u!

I replied:
I know how hard it is. It was hell for me to drag my butt to work each day for 2 years while I was on life support. Stay strong!

She totally did not get the hint:
Thanks! I might have to go back to the ER. I can't stand the pain but don't have the money 2 get the scrip filled. Everyone here is broke. Treasea (her sister) was in a bad motorcycle accident and she can't afford to give me the money.

I totally ignored her after this text. COME ON!! You have the balls to ask people with serious medical problems to give you money?? She always asks for money and I always say no or ignore her and yet she continues to ask?? Oh and she always has cash to gamble and get smokes. She just pisses me off!