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Author Topic: Yes... this is a rant  (Read 3900 times)
Brightsky69
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« on: July 16, 2011, 05:59:27 PM »

OMG!!  I just got something like six text messages in a row from a family member asking for me to wire them $100. This person claims they ďmightĒ have skin cancer. So they said to get the results of their biopsy they need $100.00 and their disability wonít pay for it. WHATEVER!  This person has been on disability for headaches. This persons father even told me that the only thing wrong with them is they are spoiled.
I am on my 2nd  kidney transplant Öspent two years on dialysis and still carried my a$$ to work everyday. I never had my hand out to family members for cash...ever. This person hasnít worked in 8 or 9 years and yet has the nerve to ask me for money??
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
sullidog
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« Reply #1 on: July 16, 2011, 06:13:45 PM »

I feel ya, I'm having the same issue, only it's not a family member, it's a fellow dialysis patient!
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May 13, 2009, went to urgent care with shortness of breath
May 19, 2009, went to doctor for severe nausea
May 20, 2009, admited to hospital for kidney failure
May 20, 2009, started dialysis with a groin cath
May 25, 2009, permacath was placed
august 24, 2009, was suppose to have access placement but instead was admited to hospital for low potassium
august 25, 2009, access placement
January 16, 2010 thrombectomy was done on access
Brightsky69
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« Reply #2 on: July 16, 2011, 06:22:32 PM »

dog - I don't know...maybe it's just me. Even if I had no medical issues I still would be pissed. I WORK for what I need and want. It just seriously gets under my skin when people who don't work but are capable of working have their hand out.
I can understand if you have serious medical issues and can't work. But you have to have some serious balls to ask a person who has been thru and still has life threatening medical problems for cash....and you don't work nor want to work.

How are you dealing with it?
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
MooseMom
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« Reply #3 on: July 16, 2011, 07:53:07 PM »

This has given me an idea for a new thread...
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"Eggs are so inadequate, don't you think?  I mean, they ought to be able to become anything, but instead you always get a chicken.  Or a duck.  Or whatever they're programmed to be.  You never get anything interesting, like regret, or the middle of last week."
Jean
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« Reply #4 on: July 16, 2011, 08:33:17 PM »

Bright Sky, I am with you!!!! Fortunately for me, my health has always been good ( well until 3 years ago) but anyways, I raised my kids on my own, did all my housework and yard work and never ever asked for a handout. Yet, I still had "friends" who would ask to borrow money from me so they could have a vacation. This same friend already owed me money!!! I guess because I worked hard and did without to raise my kids, that means I need to take care of some one else? Not a chance. Keep your money, you earned it.
( charity is another whole story )
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One day at a time, thats all I can do.
Poppylicious
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« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2011, 03:49:22 AM »

Wow!  I completely agree with your reasons for ranting (and I do love a good rant!)

But on a side-note, if you have a biopsy do you really have to fork out money before they give you the results?  That seems so wrong.
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- wife of kidney recepient (10/2011) -
venting myself online since 2003 (personal blog)
grumbles of a dialysis wife-y (kidney blog)
sometimes i take pictures (me, on flickr)

Everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt.
Brightsky69
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« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2011, 07:06:37 AM »

Poppy - I think it was a BS story to get some sympathy & to get in my wallet. It makes no sense to me....
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
jbeany
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« Reply #7 on: July 17, 2011, 11:31:02 AM »

Total BS - the bill is handled completely separate from the clinical results.
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"Asbestos Gelos"  (As-bes-tos yay-lohs) Greek. Literally, "fireproof laughter".  A term used by Homer for invincible laughter in the face of death and mortality.

Brightsky69
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« Reply #8 on: July 17, 2011, 03:21:42 PM »

I sent an email basically saying I have my own bills to pay. This person tried this the last time around Christmas....couldn't get their prescription meds then. Then they needed around $200. Of course I said NO back then too.

What got me was, we in the family had just gotten a dividend check for $500. We usually get it around Christmas time. This person told me they were going to take their check and spend some of it at the casino.  Ha Ha Ha
Then a few weeks later they are asking me for $200.
I don't think so!! :rant;
« Last Edit: July 17, 2011, 03:22:46 PM by Brightsky69 » Logged

Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
Chris
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« Reply #9 on: July 17, 2011, 09:14:15 PM »

I'm glad I do not know any family members and they do not know my cell or emails, and possibly home address. I think if they had that info, I might get a text like yours Brightsky snd I do ot even like that side of the family.
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Diabetes -  age 7

Neuropathy in legs age 10

Eye impairments and blindness in one eye began in 95, major one during visit to the Indy 500 race of that year
   -glaucoma and surgery for that
     -cataract surgery twice on same eye (2000 - 2002). another one growing in good eye
     - vitrectomy in good eye post tx November 2003, totally blind for 4 months due to complications with meds and infection

Diagnosed with ESRD June 29, 1999
1st Dialysis - July 4, 1999
Last Dialysis - December 2, 2000

Kidney and Pancreas Transplant - December 3, 2000

Cataract Surgery on good eye - June 24, 2009
Knee Surgery 2010
2011/2012 in process of getting a guide dog
Guide Dog Training begins July 2, 2012 in NY
Guide Dog by end of July 2012
Next eye surgery late 2012 or 2013 if I feel like it
Home with Guide dog - July 27, 2012
Knee Surgery #2 - Oct 15, 2012
Eye Surgery - Nov 2012
Lifes Adventures -  Priceless

No two day's are the same, are they?
Riki
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« Reply #10 on: July 18, 2011, 07:08:19 AM »

I have an exboyfriend who does that from time to time.  The last time he did it, I got a text while I was in dialysis.  He was asking me for $20 because he needed to get to Nova Scotia for something.  His family lives there, as does most of mine, but I don't know what his reason was.  As it was, I was leaving for Nova Scotia that evening too, and going to New York the next day, so I couldn't spare it.  He got rather angry with me, but it wasn't my problem.
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Dialysis - Feb 1991-Oct 1992
transplant - Oct 1, 1992- Apr 2001
dialysis - April 2001-May 2001
transplant - May 22, 2001- May 2004
dialysis - May 2004-present
PD - May 2004-Dec 2008
HD - Dec 2008-present
Brightsky69
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« Reply #11 on: July 18, 2011, 09:15:33 AM »

To me it's like asking someone who is on their death bed....Hey can I have all your stuff when you die.  Unbelievable!! 
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
Chris
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« Reply #12 on: July 18, 2011, 04:15:15 PM »

I agree with that statement Brightsky!
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Diabetes -  age 7

Neuropathy in legs age 10

Eye impairments and blindness in one eye began in 95, major one during visit to the Indy 500 race of that year
   -glaucoma and surgery for that
     -cataract surgery twice on same eye (2000 - 2002). another one growing in good eye
     - vitrectomy in good eye post tx November 2003, totally blind for 4 months due to complications with meds and infection

Diagnosed with ESRD June 29, 1999
1st Dialysis - July 4, 1999
Last Dialysis - December 2, 2000

Kidney and Pancreas Transplant - December 3, 2000

Cataract Surgery on good eye - June 24, 2009
Knee Surgery 2010
2011/2012 in process of getting a guide dog
Guide Dog Training begins July 2, 2012 in NY
Guide Dog by end of July 2012
Next eye surgery late 2012 or 2013 if I feel like it
Home with Guide dog - July 27, 2012
Knee Surgery #2 - Oct 15, 2012
Eye Surgery - Nov 2012
Lifes Adventures -  Priceless

No two day's are the same, are they?
Chris
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« Reply #13 on: July 18, 2011, 04:16:19 PM »

By the way can I have a $20 from all of you?  I'm trying to go to Vegas!  :rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :sarcasm;
Logged

Diabetes -  age 7

Neuropathy in legs age 10

Eye impairments and blindness in one eye began in 95, major one during visit to the Indy 500 race of that year
   -glaucoma and surgery for that
     -cataract surgery twice on same eye (2000 - 2002). another one growing in good eye
     - vitrectomy in good eye post tx November 2003, totally blind for 4 months due to complications with meds and infection

Diagnosed with ESRD June 29, 1999
1st Dialysis - July 4, 1999
Last Dialysis - December 2, 2000

Kidney and Pancreas Transplant - December 3, 2000

Cataract Surgery on good eye - June 24, 2009
Knee Surgery 2010
2011/2012 in process of getting a guide dog
Guide Dog Training begins July 2, 2012 in NY
Guide Dog by end of July 2012
Next eye surgery late 2012 or 2013 if I feel like it
Home with Guide dog - July 27, 2012
Knee Surgery #2 - Oct 15, 2012
Eye Surgery - Nov 2012
Lifes Adventures -  Priceless

No two day's are the same, are they?
Brightsky69
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« Reply #14 on: July 19, 2011, 05:25:29 AM »

 :rofl; :rofl; Chris!  The only person I'd give money too is my mom. And even then I'll ask "What's it for??"
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
Brightsky69
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« Reply #15 on: September 17, 2011, 06:31:26 PM »

The cousin is at it again.   :rofl;
She sent me a text saying "Hey how are you? I am not doing well, I am in such pain!!!!! like nothing I have experienced before in my life....but I can't afford the pain medication."
Translation: give me money!!  ::)
« Last Edit: September 17, 2011, 06:34:29 PM by Brightsky69 » Logged

Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
jbeany
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« Reply #16 on: September 17, 2011, 06:36:35 PM »

Tell her that meditation helps.  She needs to go somewhere quiet, far away from all electronic devices and simply breathe deeply.  It makes pain go away.

Just don't tell her that when she does it, the pain that's going away is her, from you.   ;D
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"Asbestos Gelos"  (As-bes-tos yay-lohs) Greek. Literally, "fireproof laughter".  A term used by Homer for invincible laughter in the face of death and mortality.

Brightsky69
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« Reply #17 on: September 17, 2011, 06:45:11 PM »

 :2thumbsup;
I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
rsudock
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will of the healthy makes up the fate of the sick.

« Reply #18 on: September 17, 2011, 06:56:05 PM »

:rofl; :rofl; Chris!  The only person I'd give money too is my mom. And even then I'll ask "What's it for??"

you are a good daughter...me on the other hand my mom asked me for money to go to Italy and wanted me to put it on my credit card...I was like "hell no!"

:2thumbsup;
I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."

LOVE THIS!  :rofl;


Maybe send her a bottle of sunblock to stop any future problems!!! ;)

xo,
R
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Born with autosomal recessive polycystic kidney disease
1995 - AV Fistula placed
Dec 7, 1999 cadaver transplant saved me from childhood dialysis!
10 transplant years = spleenectomy, gall bladder removed, liver biopsy, bone marrow aspiration.
July 27, 2010 Started dialysis for the first time ever.
June 21, 2011 2nd kidney nonrelated living donor
September 2013 Liver Cancer tumor.
October 2013 Ablation of liver tumor.
Now scans every 3 months to watch for new tumors.
Now Status 7 on the wait list for a liver.
How about another decade of solid health?
Wenchie58
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Always carrying the big silly grin!

« Reply #19 on: September 17, 2011, 07:36:25 PM »

WOW!  This hit close to home!  Our area had major flooding last week and three of my neices were evacuated from their apartments in a nearby town.  I offered (via facebook) to help them with anything they needed.  A sister(I have many, this one has been drawing off the government for years) texted asking for money because she had overdrawn her checking account.  Note: she was not flooded.  She calmly asked for 400....I sent 200.  She FREAKED...tore up the check, said she would never ask me for anything again.  Tonight she joined FB on her new computer and friend requested me.  Hmmmm...I don't think angry quite describes my feeling right now!  GRRRRRR!
This girl is 10 years younger than I, perfectly healthy.  Yes, I have a new kidney....but even that doesn't quite make me Superwoman....OR rich.  Does make me smart enough to never write a check again!
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Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning Satan shudders and says "Oh s**t, she's awake!"

Right nephrectomy 1963
Diagnosed ESRD 2007
"Listed" summer 2007
Transplant 3/6 match  10/24/08
sullidog
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« Reply #20 on: September 17, 2011, 07:51:36 PM »

the same lady I mentioned in my other post got her utilities shut off, but claims she got a 200,000 settlement from an accident and won 15,000 from a gamble, but still you still got your utilities turned off? and then you buy pizza for the whole unit last week? and still you ask patients for money and food? I really don't get some people. I believe this lady has the ability to work.
Also I know a patient with diabetes who doesn't work, but I personally feel that he could, maybe it's just me but I feel well enough to work so I work, and I feel that no matter what disease you have if you feel well enough to work, then do it! Just because you have a disease does not mean you should take advantage of the government, if you feel half way desent, then quit sittin around!
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May 13, 2009, went to urgent care with shortness of breath
May 19, 2009, went to doctor for severe nausea
May 20, 2009, admited to hospital for kidney failure
May 20, 2009, started dialysis with a groin cath
May 25, 2009, permacath was placed
august 24, 2009, was suppose to have access placement but instead was admited to hospital for low potassium
august 25, 2009, access placement
January 16, 2010 thrombectomy was done on access
Riki
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« Reply #21 on: September 17, 2011, 09:19:54 PM »

:2thumbsup;
I sent her back a text: "I know how you feel...it was hell for me to drag my butt out of bed to go to work for two years while I was on life support. Stay strong"
It went right over her head. She replied "Thanks. Everyone here is broke so I  don't know where I am going to get the money to stop this horrible pain."   

I should have mentioned "Oh well....I didn't get a new kidney right when i wanted it either."

I would have.  I make it very clear on facebook whenever someone in my family posts one of those thingies that say "repost this if you know someone one who.." how bitter I am by replying to them with "people like that would probably like something a little more tangible than a useless facebook post"   Not many of them talk to me anymore. *L*
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Dialysis - Feb 1991-Oct 1992
transplant - Oct 1, 1992- Apr 2001
dialysis - April 2001-May 2001
transplant - May 22, 2001- May 2004
dialysis - May 2004-present
PD - May 2004-Dec 2008
HD - Dec 2008-present
Brightsky69
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« Reply #22 on: September 18, 2011, 07:48:32 AM »

I pretty much ignored her after her last text. She has been on "disability" (so she says) for something like 5 years yet no official diagnosis from any doctor to attest to what might be wrong with her.
My guess is she is just living off her parents.
I want to tell her Get off your lazy ass and go get a job.
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
The Noob
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« Reply #23 on: September 18, 2011, 02:08:03 PM »

we have actually had some ask for money stating that because DH didn't work (no gas, uniforms, meals) and he was on SSD, that we must be rolling in the dough..?

before he got sick, our joint income was about 70K a year. after Dx, we're lucky to break 20K, and we still have all the bills and debt and probably much more so with all thats associated.

my 22 yr old pregnant daughter pulls down 12+ hour shifts at a nursing home with a typical patient load of 16-19.
he fiance works 50+hrs as a cook and walks/busses there and back (5 miles) if she is at work and can't drive him.

i went to see her few weeks ago. stopped at the dollar store to grab them a small crock pot. man standing outside at the door (about 350lbs) asks me for money. i said nope. he starts whining that he has to get on the bus and go to a location that is 2 miles away. i said well dude better get walking.
my other daughter is in between old cars and walks/rides bus everywhere. says exercise is good. saving money for next old junker.
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Brightsky69
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« Reply #24 on: September 19, 2011, 06:29:20 AM »

My cousin is my age...no kids. No responsibilites what so ever. Must be nice to be able to sit at home and sleep all day.

Her text word for word:
Hey cuz! How r u doing? I hope well! Iím not doing so well. Iíve been in bed 4 about 2 weeks. I need a medication but canít afford it. I wonít have $$ til October some time so Iíve just been layin in bed in excruciating pain. IT SUCKS! I havenít been in pain like this b4. I hope all is well w/u!

I replied:
I know how hard it is. It was hell for me to drag my butt to work each day for 2 years while I was on life support. Stay strong!

She totally did not get the hint:
Thanks! I might have to go back to the ER. I can't stand the pain but don't have the money 2 get the scrip filled. Everyone here is broke. Treasea (her sister) was in a bad motorcycle accident and she can't afford to give me the money.

I totally ignored her after this text. COME ON!! You have the balls to ask people with serious medical problems to give you money?? She always asks for money and I always say no or ignore her and yet she continues to ask?? Oh and she always has cash to gamble and get smokes. She just pisses me off!  :P
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Transplant June 11, 1991 (1st time) my mom's kidney
Received my 2nd kidney transplant Oct. 19th 2010.
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