I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
November 24, 2024, 06:25:42 AM

Login with username, password and session length
Search:     Advanced search
532606 Posts in 33561 Topics by 12678 Members
Latest Member: astrobridge
* Home Help Search Login Register
+  I Hate Dialysis Message Board
|-+  Dialysis Discussion
| |-+  Dialysis: Humor, Pictures, Stories and Poems
| | |-+  LIMERICKS		 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
Pages: [1] 2 3 Go Down Print
Author Topic: LIMERICKS  (Read 23096 times)
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« on: May 19, 2010, 06:31:12 PM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:46:54 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
Rerun
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 12242


Going through life tied to a chair!
« Reply #1 on: May 19, 2010, 08:06:48 PM »
OK here goes....

There once was a girl on dialysis
whose blood was pure toxinalysis
She slept with a machine
Who called her a queen
And they lived happy everalysis!          :bandance;
Logged
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #2 on: May 19, 2010, 09:49:47 PM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:47:21 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
okarol
Administrator
Member for Life
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 100933


Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

WWW
« Reply #3 on: May 19, 2010, 11:01:55 PM »
 :bandance; :bandance; :bandance;
Logged

Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
Lisa
Full Member
***
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 104
« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2010, 12:14:43 AM »
 :bandance; :clap; :yahoo;
Logged
Lisa
born 1966 with PKD
ESRD 1987
PD started 1987
1st hemo 1989 (permacaths, grafts and fistulas)
1st Transplant 1990
Transplant failed 1994
Hemo 1994 (permacaths, grafts and fistulas)
2nd Transplant 1995
Hemo 2010 (permacath hopefully merging into PD)
PD training 3/16/10
CAPD...the CCPD until present
...waiting to go on "the list"
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #5 on: May 20, 2010, 10:22:57 AM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:48:11 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
peleroja
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1585


I have 16 hats, all the same style!
« Reply #6 on: May 20, 2010, 10:32:22 AM »
Ok, best I can do without much thought:

A young lass with a machine
Said, I must always keep clean,
The house and the car
Or then where we are?
PD will not make me lean."
Logged
YLGuy
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 4901
« Reply #7 on: May 20, 2010, 11:07:37 AM »
There once was a man named Snicklesnorter
Who had a bright shiny quarter
He'd give it away
if he really could say
I'm going to drink a full glass of water

I've never been too good at these things but always give them a try.
Logged
okarol
Administrator
Member for Life
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 100933


Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

WWW
« Reply #8 on: May 20, 2010, 01:12:27 PM »
 :clap; You guys are so clever!
Logged

Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
glitter
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 2288
« Reply #9 on: May 20, 2010, 04:50:51 PM »
I LOVE YOUR EFFORTS!! KEEP GOING!!!   :flower; :flower; :bandance; :bandance; :bandance;
Logged
Jack A Adams July 2, 1957--Feb. 28, 2009
I will miss him- FOREVER

caregiver to Jack (he was on dialysis)
RCC
nephrectomy april13,2006
dialysis april 14,2006
Jean
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 6114
« Reply #10 on: May 21, 2010, 12:35:47 AM »
Great Stuff, oh talented ones!!!!  :yahoo;
Logged
One day at a time, thats all I can do.
Bajanne
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 5337


Goofynina and Epoman - Gone But Not Forgotten

WWW
« Reply #11 on: May 21, 2010, 06:35:00 AM »
This is quite lame, I know, but it is an addition to our limerick pool.

There was a young lady named Chlorus
Who was on dialysis long before us.
When I asked her to say
What kept her each day:
"Just keeping from that danged phosphorus!"
« Last Edit: May 21, 2010, 06:51:44 AM by Bajanne » Logged
"To be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own ...but that which is based on faith"



I LOVE  my IHD family! :grouphug;
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #12 on: May 21, 2010, 10:26:33 AM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:48:59 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
YLGuy
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 4901
« Reply #13 on: May 21, 2010, 05:22:35 PM »
Very good!  :2thumbsup; :clap;
Logged
kitkatz
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 17042
« Reply #14 on: May 22, 2010, 05:14:59 PM »
There was once a girl named Kit
Who went on dialysis in a snit.
When she was asked why
All she could do was cry.
"I feel like I am living in a pit."
Logged


lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #15 on: May 23, 2010, 10:23:07 AM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:49:39 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
Bajanne
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 5337


Goofynina and Epoman - Gone But Not Forgotten

WWW
« Reply #16 on: May 23, 2010, 02:31:47 PM »
Quote from: Henry P Snicklesnorter on May 23, 2010, 10:23:07 AM
A young lady we know as Kitkatz
When asked for more tests, said “Oh ratz,”
“I don’t think it’s funny,”
“If the labs want the money,”
“Why don’t they go pass round their hatz?”
:rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :rofl;
Logged
"To be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own ...but that which is based on faith"



I LOVE  my IHD family! :grouphug;
Stoday
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 1941
« Reply #17 on: May 23, 2010, 04:29:49 PM »
IMO limericks should be somewhat saucy. How about:-

A boy called Henry P Snicklesnorter
Played with his bits that he didn't oughter
And so did the priest
The dirty old beast
After sprinkling him with holy water.

 ;D
Logged
Diagnosed stage 3 CKD May 2003
AV fistula placed June 2009
Started hemo July 2010
Heart Attacks June 2005; October 2010; July 2011
Stoday
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 1941
« Reply #18 on: May 23, 2010, 04:56:21 PM »
I suppose the limerick ought to be kidney related. So,

A young girl with kidney disease
Had a fistula put in her knees
Naughty young Boris
Thought he'd found her clitoris
When she said "move up further, please"
Logged
Diagnosed stage 3 CKD May 2003
AV fistula placed June 2009
Started hemo July 2010
Heart Attacks June 2005; October 2010; July 2011
aharris2
Elite Member
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 1394


Volcan Pacaya, Guatemala
« Reply #19 on: May 23, 2010, 06:54:27 PM »
BAD BOY STODAY!

But well done  :rofl;
Logged
Life is like a box of chocolates...the more you eat the messier it gets - Epofriend

Epofriend - April 7, 1963 - May 24, 2013
My dear Rolando, I miss you so much!
Rest in peace my dear brother...
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #20 on: May 23, 2010, 07:23:01 PM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:50:12 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
kitkatz
Member for Life
******
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 17042
« Reply #21 on: May 24, 2010, 05:02:01 PM »
When she went off to dialysis
She was really, really pissed.
Because the time before
When she got off she weighed more
Than if she had just missed.
Logged


lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #22 on: May 24, 2010, 05:25:12 PM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:50:51 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
okarol
Administrator
Member for Life
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
Posts: 100933


Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

WWW
« Reply #23 on: May 24, 2010, 06:24:05 PM »

 :clap;

I am impressed with the talent here. My brain will not allow me to rhyme...?
Logged

Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
Henry P Snicklesnorter
Sr. Member
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Posts: 576
« Reply #24 on: May 25, 2010, 04:15:47 AM »
.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2013, 05:51:17 AM by Henry P Snicklesnorter » Logged
Pages: [1] 2 3 Go Up Print 
« previous next »
 
Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP SMF 2.0.17 | SMF © 2019, Simple Machines | Terms and Policies Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!