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Savemeimdtba
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« on: May 27, 2009, 12:06:52 PM »

Well, I guess we can ignore my previous post.  I got bad news today. I got an email from my principle saying I needed to call the head of HR so I did. He said that since I had been out on FMLA for so long that my job had been filled… I was shocked. This is not what I was lead to believe would happen… they told me my job would be there for me when I got back. Apparently, this was not the case. He said after 5 weeks of being absent the position gets filled by someone else.. I’m now on a waiting list for the next available position which will most likely not be at my school or in special education. This is a huge county.. so who knows where I’d be sent and I don’t even want to be a regular parapro - I want to be in special education. So, I don’t know what to do..

He also said that at the moment they are LESSENING staff so there aren’t any positions available anyways.. and he’d find a place for me “eventually”. So, what am I supposed to do? Wait? I guess it doesn’t matter.. it was hard enough to get a job being legally blind, no one going to hire someone who also is now on dialysis. Basically, I’m screwed. It’s not fair that I got to spend FOUR months at a job I loved, living on my own, providing for myself - doing exactly what I wanted to do my entire life… for FOUR months. And, that’s all I get? That’s bullshit. It isn’t fair.. I worked so hard to get that job and I loved the teacher and the students and it all went away. How is that fair? I’m 25. Life shouldn’t suck this much..

I guess I’m supposed to be happy that I’m alive.. and I am. I remember how bad it was on Hemo and I’m blessed to be able to do PD and to feel good everyday but I wanted my life back. I didn’t do anything wrong to deserve this shit.. But, I survived that and I’ll survive this - I’m just tired of just surviving… I want to be happy again and feel productive and contribute something to this world. It’s not enough just to live..

And, I know a transplant will happen eventually.. but how long will that take? And who says it’ll even work? Most people get out of those are a good 10-15 years and then you’re back in the same situation. Is this all that life is now? Just trying to sustain it? I admit I was scared to go back to work.. scared this would all get worse and I’d end up in the hospital because some kid gave me the flu. Maybe it’s not meant to be.. but “I” wanted to make that decision. I was not ready to give up on it but it doesn’t matter what I want I guess. Life does what it does and you’re just here.

Anyways, my best friend Katie’s coming over tonight to hang out and keep me entertained. She’s sad too so we’ll do depressed girl things and eat chocolate and watch movies and cry and stuff… ’cause Lord knows, I’m never done crying.
« Last Edit: May 27, 2009, 01:35:52 PM by Savemeimdtba » Logged

-Kristi-
12/2008 - Began Hemodialysis
03/2009 - Began P.D.

"You gotta swim, swim for your life, swim for the music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive"
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« Reply #1 on: May 27, 2009, 12:11:08 PM »

 :grouphug;

Chocolate with a good friend sounds like a big help.
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« Reply #2 on: May 27, 2009, 12:11:58 PM »

I am so sorry, Kristi.

I know that this was devastating news.  :cuddle;

I wish there were something I could do to help.

I will be thinking of you.

Aleta
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Carl transplanted with cadaveric kidney, February 3, 2011. :)
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« Reply #3 on: May 27, 2009, 12:19:44 PM »

 :Kit n Stik; Rat Bast&%$s.

Kristi i am sad to hear this.  I know how much you wanted to get back to your class even with the worries you had of catching a bug.  This stuff seems to happen to the good people. Which makes it all the worse.

Im gonna try to help you think positive.  Your young and you want to help disabled children which takes a special kind of person.  A person like you who is willing and wanting.

So my positive thoughts for you will be a job close to home doing what you want to do.  I know this isnt much but enough positive vibes coming your way may help.
Im glad you wont be alone tonight.
And you will be doing girl things  :secret;  Ohhhhhh  ;)

You have always been so positive.  I hate to see you so down.   But i totally understand why you are. :cuddle;
« Last Edit: May 27, 2009, 12:28:06 PM by paul.karen » Logged

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« Reply #4 on: May 27, 2009, 12:22:40 PM »

I'm so sorry that you lost your job.

I don't understand if you're out on FMLA, my understanding is that your job is protected?  I'm currently out on Short Term Disability/FMLA and I'm scheduled to return to work on June 26th due to my transplant.
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2000-Diagnosed IGA Nephropathy
2002-1st biopsy (complications)
2004-2nd biopsy
10/03/07-Tenckhoff Catheter Placement
10/22/07-Started Peritoneal Dialysis
03/2008-Transplant team meeting
04/2008-Transplant workup
05/2008-Active Transplant list
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4/20/09-New kidney biopsy
Savemeimdtba
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« Reply #5 on: May 27, 2009, 12:43:45 PM »

From what I understand, they are required to hold "A" job for me, not necessarily MY job.  I don't know what happens when they don't have any positions to pass me on to.. my mom says they are required to employ me in some way but I don't know.  My head teacher said to just hope that the person who takes my position doesn't like it - so we'll do that. 
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-Kristi-
12/2008 - Began Hemodialysis
03/2009 - Began P.D.

"You gotta swim, swim for your life, swim for the music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive"
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« Reply #6 on: May 27, 2009, 12:56:14 PM »

Do you have a return to work date? If so, I'd think they'd need to tell you right away where they'll place you. At least you'd know what to expect then.
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Deanne

1972: Diagnosed with "chronic kidney disease" (no specific diagnosis)
1994: Diagnosed with FSGS
September 2011: On transplant list with 15 - 20% function
September 2013: ~7% function. Started PD dialysis
February 11, 2014: Transplant from deceased donor. Creatinine 0.57 on 2/13/2014
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« Reply #7 on: May 27, 2009, 12:59:37 PM »

So sorry to hear about this Kristi and you're right, it isn't fair.  And I also think that LIFE isn't fair...all too often, bad things happen to good people and bad people sure can seem to get away with an awful lot sometimes. 

Having acknowledged however that life isn't fair, the key, trick, method or whatever you want to call it, to getting the most out of our lives is to keep on trying to have the things we want and value most...good relationships, the job that inspires us, the best health available to us as individuals (there are many perfectly healthy and perfectly miserable people out there), the best situation that we can create for ourselves.  Things seldom turn out exactly as we planned they would, I have a hard time thinking of anything in my life that was totally chosen by me, and yet we do have control over how we respond to life's unfairness with determination, flexibility,a positive confident attitude, compassion for others who deal with unfairness also etc etc.   The job situation is particularly tough especially right now but I have no doubt that with your desire to work you will absolutely be productive again and feel that your contribution counts.  I hope that you can believe that too.

As for the transplant situation, you (nor anyone) knows how long it will/can/could/should last if you have the chance to get one.  I was told (at 26) that I might get 10 years from a cadaveric transplant but in fact I got 23 years by looking after myself very well and a big heaping dose of luck of course.  My goal was simply to fit as much in as I could and never to place unnecessary limits on myself.   There were things I wanted to do (travel to remote and exotic locations for example) and was told that medically that wasn't a good idea so I had to find something else.  White water canoe trips to very remote northern destinations filled the bill and my need for adventure.  We do have limits that others might not have just as others have limits that we might not.  I always wanted kids but that didn't work out for me because of ESRD so I tried to make sure that I took advantage of the "freedom" created by not having what I would have chosen. 

Of course right now sucks and sucks horribly.  The job news is fresh and you feel disappointed.  Sounds completely normal.  I hope however that you won't stay in the dumps too long because you have too much to offer to yourself and others.  One of the hardest things I've ever had to learn about life is this exact lesson.  Our "control" of things in life, our total ability to choose exactly what we want for ourselves is an elaborate illusion that life usually shatters at some point.  However, there is great strength and power in the knowledge that we do have control on how we respond to life's twists and turns and that we can overcome a heck of a lot if we choose to do so.  Right now though, chocolate sounds good.
 :grouphug; :cuddle; :grouphug;

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Pyelonephritis (began at 8 mos old)
Home haemo 1980-1985 (self-cannulated with 15 gauge sharps)
Cadaveric transplant 1985
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« Reply #8 on: May 27, 2009, 01:04:36 PM »

I dont understand why teachers seem to get the raw deal with kidney disease, it seems so unfair, we need compassionate teachers so much. I am so grateful for my daughters teacher, she is just terrific. But I keep reading stories where teacher get shuffled out of their positions- is their NO protection for you guys?
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MandaMe1986
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« Reply #9 on: May 27, 2009, 01:25:06 PM »

I'm sorry that sucks.  You need some rainbow sherbert  :grouphug;
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Blessed are they who mourn, for they will be comforted.
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« Reply #10 on: May 27, 2009, 01:25:55 PM »

So sorry to hear about this.  The first thing that came to mind when I read this was why didn't they notify you that they were filling your position or at least make it very clear at the beginning that they would do so after a certain time period?  At least you could have been prepared or made some sort of arrangements.

 :grouphug;
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Savemeimdtba
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« Reply #11 on: May 27, 2009, 01:36:50 PM »

Thanks for the replies and support, guys <3  I also realized, I did a lot of cussing in that post  :oops; Sorry bout that... least I didn't say the F word!
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-Kristi-
12/2008 - Began Hemodialysis
03/2009 - Began P.D.

"You gotta swim, swim for your life, swim for the music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive"
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« Reply #12 on: May 27, 2009, 03:16:35 PM »

I said the F word for you....but thats ok, I am good at it.  How long have you been out?  Federal Law for FMLA is 12 weeks.  And according to our HR director...they must hold YOUR job for the 12 weeks.  I am off to research this right now!

US Department of Labor
29CFR825 Sub part F Section 825.603 and 825.604

I am back.....they must give you the same or equivalent position.  No change in pay, hours or benefits.  In my world, we would fight for the word equivalent saying...Special Ed...is Special Ed, but everywhere is different.
Good luck!
« Last Edit: May 27, 2009, 03:25:10 PM by Wenchie58 » Logged

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« Reply #13 on: May 27, 2009, 03:28:00 PM »

We're all saying the f word for you believe me.  That really sucks - no wonder you're feeling down.  I have no idea what your rights are over there, so can't help you there, but I can tell you that I've been doing PD for over a year now, and I teach (part time) and have not had any problems picking up bugs etc from the kids.  Just hope that maybe another job will come up that will be even better than the last, and that this may end up being one of those situations where you go 'oh wow, I was so down about that but in fact it led to this!'.  Thinking of you.  I'll eat some chocolate for you!
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Diagnosed Nov 2007 with Multiple Myeloma.
By Jan 2008 was in end stage renal failure and on haemodialysis.
Changed to CAPD in April 2008.  Now on PD with a cycler.  Working very part time - teaching music.  Love it.  Husband is Paul (we're both 46), daughter Molly is 13.
Savemeimdtba
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« Reply #14 on: May 27, 2009, 03:42:19 PM »

I've been out 6 months... stupid hemo had me on deaths door for three months alone :( Then training, PD, cycler training + adjusting and getting healthy took the other three.  So, I don't know if they're still obligated to do anything at this point..
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-Kristi-
12/2008 - Began Hemodialysis
03/2009 - Began P.D.

"You gotta swim, swim for your life, swim for the music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive"
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« Reply #15 on: May 27, 2009, 04:05:54 PM »

DTBA - Ain't that the truth. 

I read your first post and I hear you sister!!  It really sucks.  Do you have enough credits to even get disability?  I think you have to work so many quarters.  Oh, man!  I hope the kids eat the other bitch alive so you can have your job back.

You will get your transplant and have a good 10 - 15 years.  That is good.
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« Reply #16 on: May 27, 2009, 05:39:28 PM »

That is terrible news...I felt it when I had to sign my resignation letter that someone else worded and typed...life sucks at times.  While you are on sabatical how about volunteering with Special Olympics?? That may also open some doors for you...have you ever thought about Fostering a Special Needs child..we did that for a few years until we moved and loved it and foster parents are needed.


 :grouphug;
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
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Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
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« Reply #17 on: May 27, 2009, 05:53:59 PM »

teachers get screwed all the time -
my husband gets almost no social security because eventually he will get teacher retirement -
I can never get any of his social security because eventually I will get teacher retirement -
he has worked since he was 14 -
I was a special education teacher and we are hard to find -
there should be something you can do -
they held my job for me much longer than 5 weeks -
and in my middle pregnancy they held my job for 7 months - I taught literature then -
what about your insurance with the school district?
come to Texas -- we need teacher's
the pay is low
after 19 years I was only making 45,000/ year
but it is a job
and special education is in demand
you may have to take a Texas history class
so sorry
I love teaching and do I ever miss it -
good luck to you
don't just cry -- find out about your disability laws

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Savemeimdtba
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« Reply #18 on: May 28, 2009, 06:22:31 AM »

I don't have insurance with the school - I have it through my mom, medicaid and medicare so I'm covered in that area.  As for disability, I sent in the form for it last week.. so we'll see how that goes - I get SSI so I'm not left with nothing here - I actually make almost the same amount with SSI as I did with the job.. which is sad. 
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-Kristi-
12/2008 - Began Hemodialysis
03/2009 - Began P.D.

"You gotta swim, swim for your life, swim for the music that saves you when you're not so sure you'll survive"
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Going through life tied to a chair!

« Reply #19 on: May 28, 2009, 07:08:36 AM »

The thing is, you want to work.  You want to feel like a productive citizen.  It just sucks that they cut you off from your dream.  You are not asking for much!  You want to work with children who have it tough in life.   

I would say go get a lawyer but they would just take all your future paychecks for 5 years.
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« Reply #20 on: May 28, 2009, 01:49:10 PM »

I am very sorry to hear how your school district treated you. As an ex-teacher, I know what it's like to not have a teaching job. I admire the fact that you are so willing to pursue your teaching career with special ed kids. Don't let anything stop your dreams. You are still young and have so much to offer. Keep looking for another job opportunity so you can continue to teach next Fall. I wish you luck.
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Sunny, 49 year old female
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« Reply #21 on: May 28, 2009, 02:59:03 PM »

Keep hanging in there girl. It does suck **********At least you got good mates and CHOCOLATE!!!! At least we here DOOOO understand
 :waving; :waving; :waving; :flower; :flower;
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Beth35
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« Reply #22 on: May 28, 2009, 03:35:26 PM »

I'm a teacher too and I spoke with a lawyer last week.  He said that I could go out on FMLA for 12 weeks and then after that, they no longer had to keep me employed and could let me go. 

He also said they did not have to offer me an altered schedule (as in part time) either.  He said employers had the OPTION of offering that for their employees but that they are not mandated to do that.

If I can hold off on dialysis for another year (as if I have that control) I can collect disability retirement which entitles me to full benefits for life as well as 40 percent of my highest salary.  It's the benefits I worry about.  And finding a job after years of being out of work.  Who will want to hire me then?

AND if I want to be a teacher again after collecting disability retirement, I have to pay back every cent I collected over the years before getting another teaching job.

So I feel your pain...hang in there.  Things have to work out in the end don't they?
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Found out I had kidney disease when I was 15.
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Kidney failed at 37 and I began my second journey on dialysis.
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« Reply #23 on: May 28, 2009, 03:41:29 PM »

AND if I want to be a teacher again after collecting disability retirement, I have to pay back every cent I collected over the years before getting another teaching job.

So I feel your pain...hang in there.  Things have to work out in the end don't they?

It almost sounds as though the teaching system is discouraging you from returning to work. 

Is there any assistance available to fight this through the teacher's union? 
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« Reply #24 on: May 28, 2009, 03:52:06 PM »

I'm proud to say that in our District, we don't treat teachers like this.  I feel for all of you in that career...and I always thought that being underpaid was the biggest issue.....now I see there are SEVERAL issues.
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Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning Satan shudders and says "Oh s**t, she's awake!"

Right nephrectomy 1963
Diagnosed ESRD 2007
"Listed" summer 2007
Transplant 3/6 match  10/24/08
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