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Author Topic: Why...?  (Read 8299 times)
kitkatz
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« on: August 18, 2006, 01:47:28 AM »
Why do flies always land on the computer screen when you are busy and have nothing in your hands to swat them with except your keyboard?

Why do I sometimes wake up at midnight with itchies?  Why is it midnight and not four?

Why does my cat have to sit in front of the computer monitor when I am reading email or posting?  Why does the other cat have to lie across the mail on the desk?  Why does the cat have to sit on the newspaper or magazine I am currently reading and have spread out on the counter? Why do the cats follow me into the kitchen in the mornings?

Why does my dog hide her chewy bones around the house for snacks later?

Why is everyone and everything in my house completely bonkers?
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
Epoman
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« Reply #1 on: August 18, 2006, 01:58:41 AM »
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of drive-up ATM's?

Why are there personal flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment; but
when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon stick to the pan.

Why don't sheep shrink after it rains?

You know that indestructible "black box" that always flies with airplanes--why
not make the whole plane out of the same stuff?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?


Why ask Why?   ;D
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- Epoman
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13+ Years In-Center Hemo-Dialysis. (NO Transplant)
Current NxStage & PureFlow User.

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sandman
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« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2006, 05:45:42 PM »
Why ask why when the answer is always why not?
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Zach
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"Still crazy after all these years."
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2006, 06:49:25 PM »
Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near?
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Uninterrupted in-center (self-care) hemodialysis since 1982 -- 34 YEARS on March 3, 2016 !!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No transplant.  Not yet, anyway.  Only decided to be listed on 11/9/06. Inactive at the moment.  ;)
I make films.

Just the facts: 70.0 kgs. (about 154 lbs.)
Treatment: Tue-Thur-Sat   5.5 hours, 2x/wk, 6 hours, 1x/wk
Dialysate flow (Qd)=600;  Blood pump speed(Qb)=315
Fresenius Optiflux-180 filter--without reuse
Fresenius 2008T dialysis machine
My KDOQI Nutrition (+/ -):  2,450 Calories, 84 grams Protein/day.

"Living a life, not an apology."
Epoman
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« Reply #4 on: August 19, 2006, 12:03:08 AM »
Quote from: Zach on August 18, 2006, 06:49:25 PM
Why do birds suddenly appear, every time you are near?

Just like me, they long to be Close to you.  ;)
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- Epoman
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13+ Years In-Center Hemo-Dialysis. (NO Transplant)
Current NxStage & PureFlow User.

Please help us advertise, post our link to other dialysis message boards. You
kitkatz
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« Reply #5 on: August 19, 2006, 10:14:11 AM »
Why ask why?   Because....
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
goofynina
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He is the love of my life......
« Reply #6 on: August 19, 2006, 10:18:11 AM »
OK Zach and Epoman,  whats the dealio?? lol,  (j/k)  ahhhh, the sweet sounds of the Carpenters,
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....and i think to myself, what a wonderful world....

www.kidneyoogle.com
kitkatz
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« Reply #7 on: August 19, 2006, 11:47:07 PM »
Why do the ants march one by one...across my desk???
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
goofynina
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He is the love of my life......
« Reply #8 on: August 20, 2006, 01:26:48 AM »
OK, this isnt a "why" question it is a "how" question... How is it i can put 6 pairs of socks in the dryer and get 5 1/2 out?  hmmmmm?  never fails, baffles ones mind dont it?  ??? ::)
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....and i think to myself, what a wonderful world....

www.kidneyoogle.com
kitkatz
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« Reply #9 on: August 20, 2006, 07:44:45 AM »
I can answer the sock question.  there is a black hole in the back of every dryer that eats socks. It must have a certain amount of socks each day.  One day this black hole will implode and every sock ever taken will blow back into the dryer!
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
goofynina
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He is the love of my life......
« Reply #10 on: August 20, 2006, 11:22:53 AM »
well it better hurry cuz pretty soon, hubby aint gonna have any socks and he is going to have to resort to wearing my booties with the pink fuzzy ball on the ankle,  ;D
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....and i think to myself, what a wonderful world....

www.kidneyoogle.com
Hephs-little-lady
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Always dance like no one is watching!

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« Reply #11 on: August 20, 2006, 01:20:50 PM »
WHY? Because I say so, thats why!  ;D
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:D Knowledge Is Knowing That A Tomato Is A Fruit, Wisdom Is Not Putting It In A Fruit Salad.
kitkatz
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« Reply #12 on: August 20, 2006, 07:33:42 PM »
Why the hell not?
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
sandman
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« Reply #13 on: August 20, 2006, 07:56:14 PM »
Why ask why?  Try bud dry.  :P
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Zach
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"Still crazy after all these years."
« Reply #14 on: August 20, 2006, 08:08:55 PM »
"Some people see things as they are and say why. I dream things that never were and say why not?"

-Robert Kennedy


 :'(
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Uninterrupted in-center (self-care) hemodialysis since 1982 -- 34 YEARS on March 3, 2016 !!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No transplant.  Not yet, anyway.  Only decided to be listed on 11/9/06. Inactive at the moment.  ;)
I make films.

Just the facts: 70.0 kgs. (about 154 lbs.)
Treatment: Tue-Thur-Sat   5.5 hours, 2x/wk, 6 hours, 1x/wk
Dialysate flow (Qd)=600;  Blood pump speed(Qb)=315
Fresenius Optiflux-180 filter--without reuse
Fresenius 2008T dialysis machine
My KDOQI Nutrition (+/ -):  2,450 Calories, 84 grams Protein/day.

"Living a life, not an apology."
Hawkeye
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« Reply #15 on: August 21, 2006, 10:16:16 AM »
Here is one I'm surprised no on has asked yet.

Why did that chicken cross the road?
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It's not easy being green.
kitkatz
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« Reply #16 on: August 21, 2006, 09:30:32 PM »
The chicken crossed the road to get to the other side!

Now, why did the chicken only go half way across the road?
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
Hawkeye
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« Reply #17 on: August 22, 2006, 06:38:56 AM »
Quote from: kitkatz on August 21, 2006, 09:30:32 PM
The chicken crossed the road to get to the other side!

Now, why did the chicken only go half way across the road?

He realized he forgot his wallet?
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It's not easy being green.
Sluff
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« Reply #18 on: August 22, 2006, 06:57:01 AM »
Some things are just unexplainable.
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Sluff
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« Reply #19 on: August 22, 2006, 06:58:01 AM »
Why do birds have to fly in front of moving cars when they have the entire sky to fly in?
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Hawkeye
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« Reply #20 on: August 22, 2006, 07:03:46 AM »
Why do the morons of the world unite in front of your car when you are running late?
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It's not easy being green.
kevno
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« Reply #21 on: August 22, 2006, 03:38:45 PM »
Why? Is my driver going on holiday again for 3 weeks. That means I will have to get up at 5.30am for 3 weeks, and not 6.15am. The other drivers get me in for 6.45am. I much perfer to get in for 7.30am last on. Not with the loonies who get there for before 6.30am just to be first on the machine. The unit does not open till 7am. Can not understand them :-\
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But this little saying keeps me going!!

"RENAL PATIENTS NEVER GIVE UP!!!!!!"
kitkatz
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« Reply #22 on: August 22, 2006, 04:31:41 PM »
Quote from: kitkatz on August 21, 2006, 09:30:32 PM

Now, why did the chicken only go half way across the road?

She wanted to lay it on the line!
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
kitkatz
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« Reply #23 on: August 22, 2006, 04:39:12 PM »
Why are the ants still marching across my desk one by one?? I have killed everyone of them I have seen, but they still come into the room. Bug man coming today to see them.  Ahahahaha! *Evil grin*
Gonna get them suckas!
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
sandman
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« Reply #24 on: August 22, 2006, 06:47:27 PM »
Quote from: kitkatz on August 21, 2006, 09:30:32 PM
The chicken crossed the road to get to the other side!

Now, why did the chicken only go half way across the road?

Because the chicken was only have baked.  :P
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