Things not to do to me while I am at My dialysis center.

[kitkatz]

Do not wake me from my nap.  I tend to get very bi*** when I am awakened.




Now add yours.

[Chris]

Don't move my food and then not put it back! I can't reach behind me you know!

[flip]

Don't rush me. It takes a few minutes for me to unpack and get everything set up.

[angela515]

Don't talk to me... I just want to try and sleep and be left alone.

[Rerun]

Do not just shoot drugs into my lines without telling me what it is.  

Do not put my BP cuff in the crook of my arm so I can't bend it.

[Adam_W]

Don't promise me you'll get me some ice or move my machine so I can see it, then walk away and not do it for another half hour, forcing me to flag down someone that's already doing something else.

Adam

[Stacy Without An E]

1. Don't blast your TV.  Just because you love "American Idol" doesn't mean I want to hear it.  Schmuck.

2. Don't throw your garbage at me.  When you go for two points, hit me in the head and then laugh I may stand up and use my lines to strangle you.  Don't test me. I'll do it.  Loser.

3. Don't scream your political beliefs.  You believe the Confederacy should have won the Civil War and that slavery should be an everyday activity but I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT.  Racist fool (and true story.)

4. Don't judge me.  If I want to watch "Battlestar Galactica" or all the Star Trek movies in a row, that's really none of your business.  The fact that you watch porn on your little DVD player doesn't impress anyone.  In fact, I think that's the clinical manager coming to talk to you about it...again.  Stop touching yourself and mind your own business.

5. Don't ignore your hygiene.  Take a shower and do a load of laundry once and while so you don't smell like an anchovies ass.  Nobody should have to endure that aroma your lazy ass has created.  Dialysis isn't an excuse to be disgusting.  p*cktard.

If I was only supposed to write one, my apologies.

[twirl]

and don't tell me I am bringing in too much food when I have a sandwhich, a fruit and 10 cheetos (yes, I count them)

do not ask me, "Is that a coke?" If you can't recognize a coke bottle, what the hell are you doing being a nurse?

and do not inform me that I need to learn not to go to the restroom for over 4 hours, it only adds to my time

and when the tv's are broken for a month, do not reply,"we offer a service here, suck it up".

and do not tell me you do not have an ice machine in this unit, ice is my life

and do not tell me not to pull off my blood pressure cuff when it hurts like holy hell and I asked for help twice

and do not ask me with a laugh in your voice, "you still play hand held games"

and I could go on and on but I'll stop....

[kitkatz]

By all means go on and on.


Here is one more.


Please, oh please make sure the machine is turned towards me and tell me what is wrong with it when it beeps.  This is my life that is in that machine that is beeping all of the time.!

[Rerun]

When you know I have vision problems, and I ask what my blood pressure is, don't turn the machine to me because I can't see it.  Just answer my question.  WHAT IS MY BLOOD PRESSRUE?!

                 

[stauffenberg]

Do not, after being a dialysis nurse for 18 years, take everyone's blood pressure just as the nephrologist is coming in the room and say, "I wonder why everyone's blood pressure has suddenly gone up?"

Do not turn out the lights over me just because I have shut my eyes for 13 seconds.  I don't want to have to wait a half hour calling to nurses for the lights to be turned back on before I can start reading again.

Do not, if you are a patient next to me, insist that I have to sit in the dark doing nothing and bored out of my mind for four hours when I'm not sleepy just because you would prefer the lights off while you sleep.  Learn to sleep with the lights on.

Do not take my blood sugar reading just before starting dialysis and, if it is high, act as though this is some sort of grand medical emergency requiring immediate intervention.  As an extremely type 1 diabetic, my blood sugars have ranged from 2 to 22 every day of my life despite intensive control, and I am in no mood to be blamed or treated as a criminal for a condition which cannot be regulated no matter what I do.

Do not, if you are a patient sitting next to me or the visitors of such a patient, prattle on for hours in a loud voice repeating as Gospel truth every idiotic myth about renal disease and dialysis you might have heard on the television news or read in 'Reader's Digest.'

Do not lecture me on the benefits of exercise for dialysis patients when my hemoglobin is being kept in the profoundly anemic range and I have to conserve every ounce of energy just to be able to get through the day.

Do not set the temperature on the machine colder to keep my blood pressure up when I am already covering myself with blankets.

Do not decide to hold the EPO dosage for two or three weeks without first telling me and checking my medical history, which abundantly proves that doing so will cause my hemoglobin to drop to 80.

Finally, if I am holding a textbook open in my lap and underlining passages while writing comments in the margins, I probably don't want to talk with you for the sixteenth time about why your husband is ignoring you, when your son's teachers will finally recognize he is a genius, or whether I think you have gained weight or not.

[KT0930]

While making notes in my chart, do not ask me three times if I am diabetic. If I wasn't the first time you asked, I'm not now, 30 seconds later, either!

Don't give me cups and cups of water or saline to bring my BP up, and then wonder why I'm leaving heavier than I came in!

Don't tell me my lab values are "a little lower"; TELL ME NUMBERS!

[kitkatz]

Why does the dietician come around with lab values and tell you your phosphorous is high: then the nurse comes around and tells you the same thing:then the doc comes around and says it too?  I GOT it the first time! Am I five?

[boxman55]

I don't have any. All my tech's and nurse's have been great lately...Boxman

[kitkatz]

For Boxman >>>>>>>  

[kidney4traci]

Don't give me a lab report with stars and smiley faces - or unhappy faces.  Just give me the numbers and not the kindergarten version.  
No I don't need to know what food are on the phosphorous list - I know what they are.  I know what I eat, I know how it will effect my labs.

[paddbear0000]

I'm not on dialysis yet, so I have nothing to add, but I just wanted to coment on something stauffenberg said:

As an extremely type 1 diabetic, my blood sugars have ranged from 2 to 22 every day of my life despite intensive control, and I am in no mood to be blamed or treated as a criminal for a condition which cannot be regulated no matter what I do.

I'm so glad to know I'm not the only one who deals with this! 

[kellyt]

p*cktard.

Nice touch...   

[KICKSTART]

I dont go in clinic i'm PD but have to attend for check ups , so would like to add mine to the list .

I got up at 5am to get here on time , so at least tell me why clinic is running over 2 hours late , then the doctor turns up with a large mug of coffee , is he sadistic or what ?
Please dont talk to me like im a 5 year old
Believe me when i tell you something !
Dont call me non-compliant because i wont take certain drugs , drugs that make me very sick and feel like s**t
Dont blame me when you cant get blood out of my veins and call me an awkward so and so because of it ..maybe they are trying to tell you something ?
Try and remember WHO i am !

[stauffenberg]

I don't care if it's Valentine's Day or not, but I wish the nurses would not bring chocolate to the dialysis center and enthuse with each other about how heavenly it tastes, right there in front of the patients.  The same goes for pizzas.

Some comments other people have made remind me of the quip I have heard: "Just because I have just lost my appendix, why does everyone in the hospital assume I have lost my mind as well?"  We do not need or want to be condescended to because we are sick.  I have even read a manual prepared for patients considering PD which follows the word 'stomach' with '(belly)' as if some of us are not likely to be smart enough to know what a stomach is!  I have news for those who prepared that manual: there are some patients reading it who are smart enough to know that even 'stomach' is not the correct term, since it should be 'peritoneal cavity' or 'peritoneum.'

[KT0930]

I have even read a manual prepared for patients considering PD which follows the word 'stomach' with '(belly)' as if some of us are not likely to be smart enough to know what a stomach is!  I have news for those who prepared that manual: there are some patients reading it who are smart enough to know that even 'stomach' is not the correct term, since it should be 'peritoneal cavity' or 'peritoneum.'

If you're not smart enough to know where in the body the term "stomach" is referring to, you probably are not smart enough to be doing dialysis at home with no supervision, anyway!

[jbeany]

Do not tell me that all the information I get off of the internet is wrong!  I've got a college education.  I've got enough brains to figure out if the site I'm on is reliable or not.

Do not tell me I ask too many questions!  If you can't answer them, it's your problem.  Your ignorance is not my fault!

[jonn r]

I don't have any. All my tech's and nurse's have been great lately...Boxman

right on...same here.....besides i TELL them....whats up....not the other way

[kimcanada]

When you are coming in to pick up your mom, DON'T stand talking to me at the end of my chair because you don't want to invade her privacy when she is finishing up...grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[twirl]

When you are coming in to pick up your mom, DON'T stand talking to me at the end of my chair because you don't want to invade her privacy when she is finishing up...grrrrrrrrrrrrrr

that is so true