Carla, I am FUMING on your behalf. Fifteen years for a cadaver kidney is better than expected, and if this doctor had any medical expertise whatsoever, he would know this. Aside from that, you can do everything right and have the kidney fail within months. What a supreme jerk this guy is!
I was treated similarly as a child, led to believe that if my kidney *ever* failed, it would be entirely my fault. It has only been in the last 10 years or so that doctors have started assuming that I was some wonder patient who would do everything they ask without question because my first transplant lasted so long. Only my GP knows the truth, and he thinks my self-adjustments to medication actually helped me in the end. Who knows - so much is down to luck.
I see you're in the UK, and I know things work differently there, but I would certainly find out how you can complain. You're right to worry that such a ridiculous accusation might be in your records. I would request a copy to make sure, and if it is in there, I would do whatever you have to do to see it removed. If you have more interactions with this doctor, please set him straight. Tell him that since he didn't let you finish answering the question about what happened to your last kidney before, that you are going to answer it now. I would ask him if he honestly believes that every transplant will last a lifetime if the patient only takes their meds.
Oh, I so want to talk to this guy, and explain, using small words and only a smattering of profanity, how transplant really works.
Good luck, and I hope your next transplant goes through after all.
Henry, your story was a satisfying read. You and I will get along just fine....