So sad.....

[GoingThere]

Hi!

Today it was a beautiful sunny day and I went into the mountains. I really do love mountains from the bottom of my heart. But I was so frustrated when climbing up. In took me 3 times longer than in my best days. When I came on the top, I was tired like hell. I can see, how my energy is leaking and I'm so sad, because I know where my path leads to.....and it makes me angry, sad, depressed. This sucks.

GoingThere

[willowtreewren]

Dear Uros,
I noticed in your previous posts that you are pre-dialysis. My husband is an avid hiker and he took our granddaughter on a short hike up a mountain in Massachusetts this fall. He was ecstatic when he got back because he was not at all tired form the climb. The last time he had done that hike was when he was pre-dialysis and he thought he would not make it to the top.

You may fear the unknown of dialysis, but when you start that journey, you may find that thigs start looking up for you.

And regarding another post of yours, any girl who would judge you based on the looks of your fistula isn't worth having you. You want to be loved for the you on the inside. That is what counts.

Cheers,

Aleta

[Rivy]

  One step at a time..It's not like your trying to run a race up the mountian..Take your time and it's all the better..I'm on kidney dialysis and I do get extremely tried when hiking so I take lots of breaks and pit stops.   Hiking is for the nature...
  rivy

[cariad]

Hi Uros,

I think Aleta makes a great point. There is an excellent chance that dialysis will bring your energy back after you adjust to it. Are you being monitored for anemia? I am pre-dialysis too, with my kidney function at around 13% and anemia is a constant battle. I take iron capsules and get Epo shots every few weeks, and it does help with my energy.

It is hard to accept changes in abilities, but I do believe in your case this will only be temporary. You're absolutely right, though, when you are right in the middle of it with no clear end in sight, it sucks. It really sucks. Try to use your anger to focus on putting up the fight of your life against kidney disease. 

Good luck - we are all here to cheer you on. 

[sico]

You will feel better once you start dialysis. I struggled to walk to the end of my street before dialysis.

[Hanify]

Don't be sad it takes you longer - be pleased you can still do it.  Like the others I think you might actually feel better once you start dialysis too.  Having said that - I am insanely jealous that you are able to climb any mountain!!  I'm working on being able to get further than my letterbox!

[galvo]

Before I went on dialysis, I could barely walk 100 metres. Now, 2 months into D, I walk an hour each day and climb 180 steps in the hospital, three days a week, to get to the D ward. Things will improve, mate!

[RichardMEL]

It's also good to keep up exercise like this even when dialysis starts. I try to walk every day for 20-30 minutes, and have one "long" walk of 1:30-2 hours. Sure, I'm no gym junkie and I'm not on the rowing machine or whatever, but I do my little bit to keep my heart going (and I'm told my legs look pretty good  ) but apart from the exercise part it's great to get out into sunshine and air rather than sit in side infront of the idiot box all the time.. so even if it does take you 3 times longer to get up that hill it's great to still do it, make the effort, and try and enjoy that you still can. When you start dialysis hopefully it will be a bit easier for you to make that climb, and if you do you'll be all the better off for it on a number of levels.

[RichardMEL]

Before I went on dialysis, I could barely walk 100 metres. Now, 2 months into D, I walk an hour each day and climb 180 steps in the hospital, three days a week, to get to the D ward. Things will improve, mate!

dude! You counted the steps?!?!

I only have to go up one flight of steps (well 2 actually) but I do that every time also rather than take the lift one floor (?!!).. it feels good to get up there. Not so easy is the walk up 4 floors to my doc's office, but I do that two and get there puffed!! LOL Still I like to do that exercise because I think it's important to make an effort while I can.