throwing up

[paris]

I don't like to rant much, but this morning I need to.   As we have discussed many, many times; throwing up is a factor a lot of us deal with.  My neph knows I throw up several times a week. No one in my house every hears me because they are so use to it happening.   So, around 6ish this morning I was at it again.  It goes on for some time.  This morning my husband has decided it is a gag reflex.   Nothing to do with toxins, etc.   A gag reflex.  I have been doing this for well over two years.  And suddenly it is just a simple gag reflex.  It is hard enough to explain kidney disease with people outside the family, but now I have to re-explain to him?  I hate this disease----it is so vague to others and those living with us get use to our new "normal".  So I feel like a whinny complaining, hypochondriac.    Hate it----Hate it-------------and the journey has only started.   

[billybags]

paris, That must be awful to keep throwing up, any idea why you do it, does your neph have any ideas or pills that might work? The only time my husband has thrown up was when he had "naughty food" food he knew he should not eat. We went for a meal out last week with the family and he is always complaining there was nothing on the menu he could eat, so he went for fish and chips, (posh fish and chips) last time he did the same thing and threw up, this time it was the same he threw up,.Men you never learn. Are you eating things you know are not good for you? Just having a stab in the dark. You are not a whining, complaining, hypochondriac.  You are angry, let it all out.

[Jess21]

  Paris 
Maybe he's doing the same thing my boyfriend did...I think it's how they cope with our disease.  I think to them, somehow if they decrease our symptoms, everything might be OK.  And they don't have to deal with whats really going on for a few minutes.
When I first got sick with a "stomach virus", Jason actually was telling me it was "in my head"!  He was saying that I was worried about something, making the symptoms come, and I needed to figure out what was bugging me!    Later he admits he knew something was seriously wrong with me, but he wanted me to keep fighting, not just curl up in a corner.  Also when I was on dialysis and was tired or sick he'd complain that I was just being lazy!  At the time, I was mad about it.  But now I realize, it was those comments that kept me fighting...I wanted to "prove him wrong", and because of that, I was able to make a whole lotta people wonder if I was actually sick!
 

[okarol]

I am sorry Paris. The fact that you continually adapt and bend to the symptoms makes is indiscernible to some as the disease permeates your life. You are so good at being tough and trying to make life normal and comfortable for your family. No one can truly know what you're experiencing, even if you tell them! We are here for you. Rant anytime!
 

[Pam]

Oh Paris......I think vomiting is one of the worst things to go through. When my kidney function was 25% I threw up all the time. They ran every test they could think of. They finally said it was stress!  About a month later it just stopped. When my function was down to 10% I was nauseous all  of the time but did not vomit.
My husband takes things to the other extremr. If I sneeze or cough he's ready to take me to the ER. Or when I'm taking a nap he'll wake me up to ask me if I am ok.   

Pam

[Romona]

  I don't know what to say. I heard many of the same things. When I heard "Are you going to sleep your life away?", I wanted to scream.

[monrein]

I'm so sorry about the sensitive "gag reflex" comment, Paris,but I'm even more sorry about the regular throwing up.  I used to do that too and it's a real burden.   

[lizabee]

I'm sorry   I throw up a lot too, which sucks.  It really is hard to explain the disease to others....

[Sunny]

When I first got sick with kidney disease I threw up all the time and lost so much weight. The doctor labled me "anorexic" which really made me angry. It is one of the many symptoms we sometimes have to deal with. Thank goodness I am done with the throwing up for now, but I cannot imagine having to do it on a regular basis. I really feel for you in this regard. I wish there was something the doctors could do for you about this.

[Rerun]

Do you throw-up before you eat anything or is it after breakfast?

[glitter]

my husband threw up terribly for the frst year on D- then after that on a still regular basis- what sucked the most was that the only place that validated that it was part of ESRD was IHD! His Dr. and the dialysis clinic all denied it was an ESRD symptom. (Idiots!)

[paris]

Thanks everyone.  Dear hubby has no idea he upset me with the remark.   I think both Jess21 and Okarol hit the nail on the head.  He doesn't want there to be anything really bad going on and if he doesn't talk about it, it isn't real.  And I do adapt as things progress.   I just needed to scream for a  moment this morning.    And the vomiting is very random.  I follow the renal diet.  It can come before eating, after, sleeping, cleaning -- any time any where.  Gag reflex -- ha!  I'll show you gag reflex!!   Thanks for your responses.  I feel like someone "gets it".   

[okarol]

 
Here's your gag reflex 

[jennyc]

Paris 
Maybe he's doing the same thing my boyfriend did...I think it's how they cope with our disease.  I think to them, somehow if they decrease our symptoms, everything might be OK.  And they don't have to deal with whats really going on for a few minutes.
When I first got sick with a "stomach virus", Jason actually was telling me it was "in my head"!  He was saying that I was worried about something, making the symptoms come, and I needed to figure out what was bugging me!    Later he admits he knew something was seriously wrong with me, but he wanted me to keep fighting, not just curl up in a corner.  Also when I was on dialysis and was tired or sick he'd complain that I was just being lazy!  At the time, I was mad about it.  But now I realize, it was those comments that kept me fighting...I wanted to "prove him wrong", and because of that, I was able to make a whole lotta people wonder if I was actually sick!
 

  OMG.... mine does the same thing! He tries to be supportive but sometimes his self protective reflex gets the better of him and up go the walls. He forgets everything he's ever been told about CRF and just goes on to assume i'm being lazy or putting it on. He even said to one person that he doesn't believe in making it too easy for me in case i give into the illness. He thinks the more he downplays my symptoms the more i'll fight (i guess he's right, in a way. even after 7 years the only thing i rely on him for is to bring in my boxes. He went overseas twice once for a month and a half the next for a few weeks. the first time it was just me and my son and i did everything myself. That's also why i consider him to be my hubby, i don't have a carer. i am my own carer. It's funny how they work. We don't think they know us at all but sometimes they manage to get under our skin in just the right way (feels really wrong at the time though).

He's gotten a little bit better recently, i had to see my neph just after my fistula was revised and he took me. i think he felt guiltly becuase the day my fistula failed i had to drive myself to hospital for bloods and it failed on the way. Anyway, my neph is really good, i mean capt awesome good. So he's there shoving all this info down hubs throat, i'm shooting questions left and right and hubs walked out a little shakey. I don't think he really realised just how bad thing were getting. He has eased up now. In 7 years he's only been to about 5 dr's appointments with me.

Also i think we've been through so much that sometimes he really wants to just shut it out and go back to the easy days before i was sick. It's hard for him to watch me like this, it's that "i'm a man i have to protect my wife from the world" state of mind. He can't protect me from this, he can't even make it go away or make it better. Most men just beat threats to their loved ones into submission (physically or metaphorically) with crf they can't do anything, i think hubby feels a bit useless with it and it makes him angry so he chooses to ignore it as well. Very complicated.

Jess21.... I get the same type of vomiting. Its really random. I'll be fine and have lunch then come about 5 (example can happen any time of day) it feels like nothing has been digested and i just keep getting worse until  . We were going out for dinner one night and it happened 10 minutes before we were  due to leave. obviously we were late and hubs had the shits a bit. The worst is when i feel like that i can't brush my teeth. I doesn't even have to hit my molars before i'm vomiting, so its not gag reflex either. It seems to have stopped the last two weeks (apart from coming down from the operation drugs), i've been doing longer dwells and my pth has come down to almost normal levels in the same timeframe. My creatine is still high but my urea has gone from 40+ to 20+.

[Mimi]

I know how you feel Paris.  It is sad when family gets so attuned to
your sickness that they make smart remarks and act disinterested.
I guess all of us go through some form of this.  Maybe we are too
strong and adjusting to the ESRD too well, but like you that is the only way I know to keep going.  I try not to be too sensitive to this. but like you sometimes I just lose it.  The important thing is for you to take good care of yourself.  I'm praying for you.

[KICKSTART]

Sorry Paris im going to have to type and run off to hemo ! I was given 2 reasons for throwing up (even on dialysis) toxins or fluid. Is it white froth? thats fluid . If its food , thats toxins. Maybe you should 'gag' your hubby ? 

[Ken Shelmerdine]

Paris sorry for all you are having to go through. Are you still pre- dialysis?

[pelagia]

  I wish it was easier for you

[Jean]

Sorry this is happening to you Paris. I dont have the experience, but do have lots of sympathy for you.
Hugs

[paris]

Kickstart and Ken,  Yes, still pre-dialysis (yea!) and yes, the neph says toxins are the culprit.    It reassures me to read that so many have had the same problem.  Maybe I should print up everyone's replies and show them to my better half.   He hasn't dared to say another word about "gag reflex". I think the look on my face might have made him regret the words!   Poor guy!   

[MissyKew]

Paris, I had vomiting predialysis.  It would happen when I took my meds, after I took my meds, and most embarassing, when I was being intimate with my boyfriend.  It did stop after I went onto dialysis.

I hope the vomiting will stop and you will feel better.

[hurlock1]

I don't believe that I have thrown up since I have been on dialysis. I can't figure out if I'm missing out of if I should be glad. I don't even get nauseous. Tell me what to do.

[MissyKew]

Celebrate Hurlock..  .vomiting sucks...

[paris]

I don't believe that I have thrown up since I have been on dialysis. I can't figure out if I'm missing out of if I should be glad. I don't even get nauseous. Tell me what to do.

Be very grateful!  Not knowing when or where you are going to throw up, makes doing things a little tricky.  Anywhere I go, I need to know where the bathroom is, just in case.

[aharris2]

Plastic baggies, Paris. We are usually able to be quite discreet. Then we zip it closed and dispose.