Ignorant things people have said to you

[angieskidney]

I was in the hospital last month and they wanted to cath me to do a clean catch urine, I tried to tell the nurse that I don't pee, but she kept insisting that I was not relaxed and that if I'd just relax she could get a specimen (as she jams the catheter tube around up inside me) Thank God for another nurse that happened to come in at the time, and when the mean nurse said she won't relax so I can get a specimen, the good nurse said, well she's on dialysis she doesn't pee!! Well mean nurse stomps out of the room like its my fault I don't pee. I wanted to give nice nurse a hug.

Ya it is amazing what some staff don't understand! When I went to London, ON (2 1/2 hrs up north) to where my transplant hospital is, as part of the transplant work up, a nurse there was telling me that I had to have a full bladder for one test. I told her over and over again how that was not possible and she tried to tell me that if I didn't have the full bladder that the test would have to be cancelled til I came in with a full bladder. I just ignored her and went in anyway and the test was never cancelled

[angela515]

I hate when I go to the hospital and they want a urine sample... and you explain to them your on dialysis and you will pee when you pee if you pee....and the nurse leaves... and then comes back with water and says try drinking something! I'm like, uhm are you trying to overload me with fluids??? 

[RichardMEL]

I had someone look at my fistula, and it is quite "raised" or pronounced.. anyway someone said after I got them to feel the thrill/buzz (it's my party trick, it almost always freaks people out! LOL). Anyway they said "hey do you have batteries in there doing that? How can you go through security at the airport?"

*shakes head*

[DeLana]

I was in the hospital last month and they wanted to cath me to do a clean catch urine, I tried to tell the nurse that I don't pee, but she kept insisting that I was not relaxed and that if I'd just relax she could get a specimen (as she jams the catheter tube around up inside me) Thank God for another nurse that happened to come in at the time, and when the mean nurse said she won't relax so I can get a specimen, the good nurse said, well she's on dialysis she doesn't pee!! Well mean nurse stomps out of the room like its my fault I don't pee. I wanted to give nice nurse a hug.

Just remember that you have the right to refuse any and all medical treatment - since you know that you can't possibly produce any urine, don't let them cath you. 

When I worked on hospital floors, I realized that many nurses know little about the ESRD pt; they should, but unless they ever worked in dialysis many just don't realize that ESRD pts may not produce any urine at all, have strict dietary limits, fluid restrictions, and special accesses.  If in doubt, have them call a dialysis nurse - there should at least be a nurse on call who can advise the floor nurse (or lab tech!) 

Sorry this happened to you.

DeLana   

[angieskidney]

I was in the hospital last month and they wanted to cath me to do a clean catch urine, I tried to tell the nurse that I don't pee, but she kept insisting that I was not relaxed and that if I'd just relax she could get a specimen (as she jams the catheter tube around up inside me) Thank God for another nurse that happened to come in at the time, and when the mean nurse said she won't relax so I can get a specimen, the good nurse said, well she's on dialysis she doesn't pee!! Well mean nurse stomps out of the room like its my fault I don't pee. I wanted to give nice nurse a hug.

Just remember that you have the right to refuse any and all medical treatment - since you know that you can't possibly produce any urine, don't let them cath you. 

When I worked on hospital floors, I realized that many nurses know little about the ESRD pt; they should, but unless they ever worked in dialysis many just don't realize that ESRD pts may not produce any urine at all, have strict dietary limits, fluid restrictions, and special accesses.  If in doubt, have them call a dialysis nurse - there should at least be a nurse on call who can advise the floor nurse (or lab tech!) 

Sorry this happened to you.

DeLana   

Ya that is true! Don't let them do anything to you that you know isn't right! you have every right to be a difficult patient and then when they are proved that you are right and they were wrong you will feel better about yourself for staying strong!

[tubes]

]Not sure if this qualifies as ignorant or just plain stupid.

I had one nurse tell me to stop coming to this site becuz I ask too many questions now.

Another nurse said...and she agrees with the doctor.  That this site is bad becuz it makes patients depressed. 
Thats just ridiculous.  You're most likely depressed becuz of what you're going throu.  Also becuz this site is more informed then most doctors.  You're coming here becuz you want/need support and info that doesn't come with BS from your docs/nurses/surgeons. 
Plain and Simple---this site HELPS not depressess





EDITED: Fixed color, kitktz-Admin

[Rerun]

I think it is healthy to vent.  Believe it or not....... but most people I know tell me what a good attitude I have.  WELL, that is because I come here to bitch so they never get my rath.

[jbeany]

Not sure if this qualifies as ignorant or just plain stupid.

I had one nurse tell me to stop coming to this site becuz I ask too many questions now.

Some of them hate informed patients - they have to actually be informed to deal with us!

( A big fat raspberry Pbbblt to them, for their attitude, too!)








EDITED: Fixed color-kitkatz,Admin

[kitkatz]

There is too much information on this site for us, the patients, and some medical professionals do not like us to be informed.  I agree... big fat red raspberries to anyone who says not to use this site. Tell them to take two and call us in the morning!

I know I am able to deal with the stress of dialysis because there is somewhere for me to vent and talk to other people who have been where I am or are going through similar things.  Also I feel good when I can help another patient with a problem or with advice because I have been there and done that.  I wish this site had been around eight years ago when I started with this mess.  It would have been invaluable.  I struggled for years by myself.  Every time the social worker said I am going to get a patient forum together at the dialysis center she weaseled out of it, or it was scheduled for a day I was not there or when I was on the machine. Thank goodness for Epoman and his site.  I can deal a lot better with things related to dialysis with normal people who do not understand dialysis.  I have a place to vent so my hubby and family do not get all of the anger focused onto them.  It is hard to have a disease that you know is out to get you day in and day out.   And the waiting for the transplant list gets to me and so I come here to vent and rant.   

I am going to get off of my high horse now and let this topic go.  Thank you all for being here!

[angieskidney]

Tonight I went to a wedding (Sandman was supposed to come but had to go home early because the car company screwed him) and you shoulda heard some of the things people said about my health. One person was telling me, "Come on drink something!" and I said I can't and she said, "I have seen you drink before! Come on and drink!" and I said, "Ya .. when I HAD a kidney!!" and she just looked at me dumb like and I said, "you do know why I am on dialysis right?" and she said, "I thought that was because you only have one kidney!"

Another said when I said I can't drink really because I have to watch how much I take in because I don't pee, said, "so you have a catheter for your pee?" and I said, "why would I need a catheter if I have no kidney?" and she just looked at me dumbfounded. 

Not sure if this qualifies as ignorant or just plain stupid.

I had one nurse tell me to stop coming to this site becuz I ask too many questions now.

Some of them hate informed patients - they have to actually be informed to deal with us!

( A big fat raspberry Pbbblt to them, for their attitude, too!)

As for coming to THIS site ... I will say that this site promotes support and communication! something we do NOT get from our staff!! Right? Sure I have had my problems with the administrator of this site but we are all in this together and I will never say that this site is a bad thing. Infact, ever since this site, I have become more informed and have impressed my dialysis nurses with my knowledge and even the Nephrologist said only 2 months ago that I will put him out of a job with how much I know I say Good Job to all who help run IHD! 





EDITED: Fixed color-kitkatz,Admin

[RichardMEL]

Just playing devil's advocate for a moment here.. I can actually understand in a small way why some medical types are upset about patients being informed and coming to a site like that - not for the support or the ability to vent, but because say something is discussed that involves something they are facing, and they read someone else's experience which might be quite bad which then worries them, and they ask the meds "hey I read that this happened to someone... could it happen to me?" - the other thing I think is that there is a general belief that anything on the internet could be wrong (and it is true, to some extents) and thus you might be getting incorrect information. Note I am NOT suggesting that about this site, just a general comment. I think one thing this site has confirmed even in the relatively short time I have been reading it is that everyone has different perspectives and experiences and it is actually comforting to me. I actually feel a little better about where I am at.

Anyway my response is that the medical staff should WELCOME our questions - whatever the basis behind them. They are there to help us help ourselves, and knowledge is power. Luckily the staff I deal with are always happy to answer even the dumbest question and explain things to me. I think it's important to know. For me, understanding helps to accept what is going on and why things are. Of course in my professional life (in IT) I like to try and explain to clients what is going on so they can understand more than "the computer doesn't work" - hopefully understanding willbring apprieciation for the problem and time/effort taken to fix it... mostly that works and people seem to apprieciate being given an explanation. And as a paitent I sure like the same in return.

[Rerun]

Back on Topic.

I was talking to a lady the other day and the subject came up as to why I didn't work.  I told her I had kindey failure.  She says....."one or both kidneys; Oh my gosh I hope only one failed"  I am just speachless for a minute trying not to reach over and choke her.

[kitkatz]

Choking her would not help.  A new brain would help in the long run for someone that dumb!

[DeLana]

]Not sure if this qualifies as ignorant or just plain stupid.

I had one nurse tell me to stop coming to this site becuz I ask too many questions now.

Another nurse said...and she agrees with the doctor.  That this site is bad becuz it makes patients depressed. 
Thats just ridiculous.  You're most likely depressed becuz of what you're going throu.  Also becuz this site is more informed then most doctors.  You're coming here becuz you want/need support and info that doesn't come with BS from your docs/nurses/surgeons. 
Plain and Simple---this site HELPS not depressess

Agreed.   Nurses are required to teach patients (and so are MDs, of course) and part of that is reassuring them about things they have heard or read - and not just on the Internet!  It's amazing what some patients have been told by others - family members, acquaintances, neighbors - about procedures they are about to undergo.  They should ask their nurses or doctors about this, and medical professionals should welcome this opportunity to reassure the pt.

BTW, what's even worse - I have heard a dialysis patient (a very unhappy, bitter individual) tell his neighbor, who was scheduled for a thrombectomy for his clotted graft, "Oh, I don't know if I woud agree to this - I know people who have died   from this procedure!"      It took a lot of reassuring for the frightened pt - who, of course, survived the procedure just fine*.

DeLana     

*Of course, as with any procedure or operation, there is a very small risk involved.  But it is remote and, although it needs to be addressed (see consent forms), it definitely does not need to be emphasized to a pt who has no other choice but to undergo the procedure (yes, he could get a perm cath instead, but he might just as likely - or unlikely - die from that procedure!)








EDITED: Fixed color-kitkatz,Admin

[DeLana]

I was talking to a lady the other day and the subject came up as to why I didn't work.  I told her I had kindey failure.  She says....."one or both kidneys; Oh my gosh I hope only one failed"  I am just speachless for a minute trying not to reach over and choke her.

Oh, my 

DeLana

P.S.  Well, at least she knew that most people have two kidneys 

[angieskidney]

I was talking to a lady the other day and the subject came up as to why I didn't work.  I told her I had kindey failure.  She says....."one or both kidneys; Oh my gosh I hope only one failed"  I am just speachless for a minute trying not to reach over and choke her.

Oh, my 

DeLana

P.S.  Well, at least she knew that most people have two kidneys 

lol ya it is amazing how many people don't even know that!

it still kills me that my own brother's wife didn't know that you can live on one kidney and that I had none. She actually thought I was on dialysis to HELP MY REMAINING KIDNEY!  I can't believe she was like "drink! Come on have a drink" and thought I wasn't drinking because of my mom was at the wedding! 

Maybe that is why one of my friends thought that my dialysis was attached to my kidney 

[sandman]

I don't wish to insult anyone but I have been noticing something awkward here.  Everyone here is disgusted with how informed society is ( or lack of it ) pertaining to CKD and I don't blame you for getting upset when someone decides to offer un-sound advice on how to clear that problem up.  Obviously, they do not understand what's going on.  But insulting or physically attacking those idiots does not help them to understand.  I found that in most cases, you have to explain it in a way that only a child could understand.

But then again, some people just don't want to listen or don't even care because it does not effect them.  Others maybe to horrified to believe something like this could actually be for real.  I bet some of you never thought about that, huh?  I tell you this though.  If everyone actually knew what CKD is, you would all have a more sympathetic ear.

I'm thinking that maybe our schools should start teaching our childern in health class, what happens to you when your organs fail.

[jbeany]

Well, I'll admit to not being informed about a lot of things that I haven't had personal experience with.  I didn't know much about Parkinson's until the mess before the election with Michael J. Fox and Rush Limbaugh.  I looked some of it up on the internet.  But I didn't need to know the details of the illness to understand that Limbaugh's comments were ignorant!

I'm thinking that maybe our schools should start teaching our childern in health class, what happens to you when your organs fail.

Actually, given the number of people who don't have any idea what their kidneys are, let alone where in the body they are located or what they do, I say they should start with basic biology, which seems to be sorely lacking.

[Rerun]

I'm sure we all take a diplomacy pill before we talk to these people.  This thread is just a place to come vent our frustrations and make fun of what "little" people really know about CKD. 

[Epoman]

I don't wish to insult anyone but I have been noticing something awkward here.  Everyone here is disgusted with how informed society is ( or lack of it ) pertaining to CKD and I don't blame you for getting upset when someone decides to offer un-sound advice on how to clear that problem up.  Obviously, they do not understand what's going on.  But insulting or physically attacking those idiots does not help them to understand.  I found that in most cases, you have to explain it in a way that only a child could understand.

But then again, some people just don't want to listen or don't even care because it does not effect them.  Others maybe to horrified to believe something like this could actually be for real.  I bet some of you never thought about that, huh?  I tell you this though.  If everyone actually knew what CKD is, you would all have a more sympathetic ear.

I'm thinking that maybe our schools should start teaching our childern in health class, what happens to you when your organs fail.

The main purpose of this site sandmansa is not to inform the general public, this site is here to allow dialysis patients to rant and vent about those ignorant people. There will ALWAYS be ignorant people in the world no matter how much we try to educate them. The members here will always be welcomed to rant and verbally attack this people, this is our little place on the Internet. 

I think one of the problems is that most healthy people think "oh that could never happen to me" So they have no reason to inform themselves about serious medical issues. I still meet people to this day that have no idea what dialysis is.

- Epoman

[jbeany]

Today's grit-my-teeth-in-the-face-of-ignorance moment - 10 minutes after explaining to someone about the whole BMI under 30 to get on the transplant list business, and a lovely discussion of the 10 pounds I've lost and the 20 to go, they offered me dessert. And got annoyed when I said I didn't want any.  "You'll be too skinny if you lose that much weight."

What?  I just explained that losing 20 pounds would get me from the obese category to the overweight category.  I am not about to become anorexic, for pete's sake.  And I am not doing this for vanity's sake, either.  Looking better will be a nice side effect, but if that was all I needed for an incentive, I'd have lost the weight a long time ago!

 

[angieskidney]

I don't wish to insult anyone but I have been noticing something awkward here.  Everyone here is disgusted with how informed society is ( or lack of it ) pertaining to CKD and I don't blame you for getting upset when someone decides to offer un-sound advice on how to clear that problem up.  Obviously, they do not understand what's going on.  But insulting or physically attacking those idiots does not help them to understand.  I found that in most cases, you have to explain it in a way that only a child could understand.

But then again, some people just don't want to listen or don't even care because it does not effect them.  Others maybe to horrified to believe something like this could actually be for real.  I bet some of you never thought about that, huh?  I tell you this though.  If everyone actually knew what CKD is, you would all have a more sympathetic ear.

I'm thinking that maybe our schools should start teaching our childern in health class, what happens to you when your organs fail.

I have thought of that Jeff and I think that last line is great but you know with the failing education system they are not about to add that

I am always patient and have never belittled anyone for asking. I take the time and explain. But it gets frustrating and here is the perfect place for all of us dialysis patients to vent about this. I mean we can't vent to those "idiots" as you called them

I love explaining .. but sometimes it frustrates me when I realize that the people I have always been open with about my health has never even listened to a word I say and then tells me to drink at a wedding I go to with them ... 

[sandman]

I'm not saying that it should be up to you ( the patients ) to teach the world about your health problems.  I was just making note of how poor our education system is and what I would like to see future generations learn so this kind of aggravation does not have to happen.

Also, I was getting the impression that some of you were may have been biting people heads off for there ignorance.  My apologies if I was mistaken.

[angieskidney]

Also, I was getting the impression that some of you were may have been biting people heads off for there ignorance.  My apologies if I was mistaken.

*Angie bites off Sandman's head*

lol don't worry.

[kitkatz]

I am not going to argue about the educational system here in America, however let me point out one thing. As a teacher it is my educational responsibility to teach your children how to read, write, and do math.  With the curriculum written as it is, I do not have time to teach anything else, much less the healthy way to live.  Parents take your responsibilities back!

There I hijacked this thread.  I am now returning you to your regular topic!