Sorry but my turn Again....

[tweetykiss]

 

We saw the nephrologist today and not only the labs were very bad but he said this is a very unusual case translated by me (rare = death), he said the pathologist only stated high blood pressure and there is no lupus nor vasculitis....we saw the rheumatoloigist on Friday....and that is what he said......he now suspects clots....now the word suspects translation (suspects = "I am not sure but I am only guessing"). He will start him on blood thinners sooner since he thinks the blood is not flowing well into the kidneys...now the word thinks...
translation (again "I don't know but I am only guessing") ok this is all now guesswork.......

So now is he going to live or did I say marriage vows only to stay married fifteen years.....

I asked him tonight to get a second opinion and let's go to where I go and he can get labs done and the biopsy done there...well guess what he won't because he does not want to and say "we ain't got the money" well I don't care what it costs, I want it done but he won't go for a second opinion and even one of his brother offered him money the other day to get a second opinion....and when I brought that up, he said he still won't do it......

Now I am sleeping on the couch tonight since I am not going to deal with this cr*polla.......here I am taking care of him and he will rely on a pathologist who might have been drunk that day and didn't do her/his job........

He finally agreed he will call the nephrologist tomorrow to have another pathologist take that same sample and test it...I told him page him and he said he is not there tomorrow, I said "wherever there is a will, there is way"........

I will fight this tooth and nail and if I have to make him get a second opinion, I will make him do it......

[charee]

sorry to hear your not coping well a second opinon sounds like the way to go hang in there

[st789]

The will and power mind of the wife, priceless.

Hang in there.

[Sluff]

It's great that you have the will to fight this and get to the bottom of things. What a fantastic wife, your husband is lucky to have you. Just remember as the patient sometimes we accept the results because we are too tired at times to give a hoot. After a good rest we sometimes change our minds. The Caretakers job is not an easy one. You are doing fine. Try to realize that every road block does not necessarily mean death, referring that way may force someone to give up. Just a thought.  hang in there Tweety.

[keefer51]

Tweety, Although the news you received is not the answer you both were looking for it is great to get a second opinion. I know your husband and you are scared but i have to agree with sluff as a dialysis patient there  are many times my judgment has been cloudy. I give my self a little time out and think about what i want to do. Kidney disease does make a person very tired. Things may change for him after talking it over with you.

[RichardMEL]

Keefer said it pretty much for me.. as in I was thinking - husband is obviously distressed and scared.. there's only so much crap you can process at any one time..perhaps he came to his limit.. but seems like after he had some time to process things and get his head straight he realised it perhaps is a good idea to get that second opinion.

I know it's trying for you and all you can do is hang in there and support him... As scary and worrying as it is for you - it's 10 times as worse for him since it's his life...

[andrea_c]

it is so difficult....keep hope

[tweetykiss]

Thanks everyone for your support and feedback, we both did agree that we didn't need the second opinion since I called the Nephrologist a few days after I made this post and he said he talked at great length with the pathologist and this pathologist is one who strictly deals with the kidneys...so we just stayed with the VA and now his levels have skyrocketed and dialysis starts this week...no turning back....

We saw the Nephrologist today and he even said the slides are sitting in the office and he stated there are many scar tissues around the kidneys.

[okarol]

I hope things get better soon Tweety. 

[charee]

Hey Tweety things will improve soon I'm sure hang in there 

[MyssAnne]

Oh, Tweety. It's so hard to be a caretaker, man, I would love it if you were mine, you are such a fighter!  Most likely, as has been said, your husband is tired, and scared. He's tired of fighting, of the constant battles. Give him a day or two, to recuperate, then try again!  At least get the samples retried, if not a second opinon!