Would you change it?

[Falkenbach]

I've been thinking about this lately - I think most people who have had a serious illness like kidney failure would probably not change it if given the opportunity. Perhaps I'm grossly wrong. But I think about the whole new perspective I've got from going through this, and I feel it's been very valuable learning, that otherwise might have taken me many decades more to reach under normal circumstances.

Perhaps that's all easy for me to say 'cause I haven't had to go through dialysis yet, or any of that, and I'm getting a pre-emptive transplant from a live donor.

What is your take on this, everybody? Would you change it if you could?

[Roxy]

I absolutely would change it. Granted, I have learned more about myself through this process. However, I feel I was already on the road to coming to the conclusions I have come to. It kills me to watch my family join me on this roller coaster that is the life of a kidney failure patient. If it was just me that was effected, maybe I'd be more ok with it. However, watching the anticipation of ever lab report and every phone call, then hearing the fear and seeing the sadness; almost makes me feel worse than kidney failure itself. I dunno, that's just my thoughts and how I feel about it.

[Falkenbach]

You have some very valid points, Roxy.

[KICKSTART]

Oh yes i WOULD change it . I wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy. Living this sort of half life. No outward signs to show how ill you really are, no real understanding from friends (except on here of course) I think the worst thing i find is ..you look ok , so it cant be that bad can it ?

[tamara]

I'd change it in a heart beat.

[anja]

  I concur with the others before me.

[Falkenbach]

I think the worst thing i find is ..you look ok , so it cant be that bad can it ?

Oh god, do I know exactly what you mean. I cut loose one group of friends over this, one of them in particular went a little too far with it and when I got angry with her, the others treated me like the bad guy. I decided to hell with this group of girls, I don't need them. 

It was very disappointing because they were all 5-8 years older than me and I expected them to be more mature. But I did myself a huge favour ridding myself of them.
 

[Wattle]

I'd change it in a heart beat.

Exactly my feelings. I have an inherited kidney disease, PKD. My father died due to complications of dialysis and the disease at 42 years. I have been surrounded by this my whole life.

Yes, I would change it in a heart beat.

[Falkenbach]

My hypothesis was obviously very wrong.

I think everyone's opinion is valid, btw.

[Amanda From OZ]

oh god i agree with everyone else!!! i would not wish this on my worst enemy!! This disease will haunt me and my family for life! i would change this situation in a SECOND!!!

[Wattle]

My hypothesis was obviously very wrong.

I think everyone's opinion is valid, btw.

Cycobully, It may not be wrong in your situation. We all have a different story to tell. In a few years your opinion may also change or it may not.
I am hoping your transplant is a great success and dialysis never becomes a reality for you.

[charee]

of course i would change everything , especially now that I'm dialysis, looking at the machine evertime I'm hooked up i think of my kids , we have pkd and how i wish  that  they  never have to go through what i have just started,and as other have said you wouldn't wish it on your worst enemy.

[Sluff]

Feelings change like the wind with our emotions. No one wants to have kidney failure but I think what you mean is that there are days for a pre dialysis patient when you feel like this is a joke and not really happening to you. Like for me there are days when I feel sick and days when I don't. On the days when I do feel like crap, I read the posts here and start to feel like my situation isn't so bad because of where I'm at and get mad at myself for feeling so lousy and I'm not even on dialysis yet. Then there are days when I feel good and start to think maybe the Doctors are wrong and then I think maybe I'm just acting like a hypochondriac and should put it out of my head. But then I wake up when I feel like poo and realize it could be true again. Quite the roller coaster ride.

[AlasdairUK]

I would change it in a second.

[bolta72]

If only I could return to yesteryear

[George Jung]

Ummm.....defiantly would change it.  In an instant!

[lola]

In a heartbeat!!! My hubby always had such a more positive outlook and just said it's really not a big deal things could be worse, but when we found out our youngest was following the same path as him the look on his face broke my heart.

[glitter]

change it!!

[thegrammalady]

in a previous post (somewhere in a different thread) i commented on kidney failure as a terminal disease. just about everyone jumped down my throat.  no problem, everyone has their own point of view. what i meant was that for kidney disease there is no cure. even a transplant is only a treatment. and no matter how long it takes this disease nor complications of it will eventually kill me. if i choose not to do dialysis, it will kill me in a reasonably short time. yes if i had a choice, i wouldn't have this. this thing called end stage renal disease. who in their right mind would. however if god had given me a choice...i'd take this over cancer or aids or just about anything else. no i don't look sick, and people don't understand, but there is no point in pissing and moaning about what can't be changed. life is what you make of it, and as long as i don't dwell on my limitations, it isn't all that bad.

[LightLizard]

in a previous post (somewhere in a different thread) i commented on kidney failure as a terminal disease. just about everyone jumped down my throat.  no problem, everyone has their own point of view. what i meant was that for kidney disease there is no cure. even a transplant is only a treatment. and no matter how long it takes this disease nor complications of it will eventually kill me. if i choose not to do dialysis, it will kill me in a reasonably short time. yes if i had a choice, i wouldn't have this. this thing called end stage renal disease. who in their right mind would. however if god had given me a choice...i'd take this over cancer or aids or just about anything else. no i don't look sick, and people don't understand, but there is no point in pissing and moaning about what can't be changed. life is what you make of it, and as long as i don't dwell on my limitations, it isn't all that bad.

If I could change it but keep the mental and spiritual focus that my condition has brought to me,
I would have it changed. But, if I had to return to my previous state of 'searching for the answers'- no, I would prefer the path I am on now.
I'm 58 years old and have had a good life, so far. I would probably feel different about it if I were younger, but for the most part, I feel that there are worse conditions to live in, and I do feel blessed, in many ways, by what I have learned through facing my mortality squarely.

love

~LL~

[mallory]

I'd change it if I could.  While I'm at it, I'd like to be taller, skinnier and richer, too!   

[Sluff]

I'd change it if I could.  While I'm at it, I'd like to be taller, skinnier and richer, too!   

I don't know about the taller and skinnier but if you got the money Honey, I got the time

[mallory]

Oh, Sluff, you smooth talker!  If only you lived in Utah......

[kitkatz]

I would change this in an instant if I could!

[Bill Peckham]

I've been thinking about this lately - I think most people who have had a serious illness like kidney failure would probably not change it if given the opportunity. Perhaps I'm grossly wrong. But I think about the whole new perspective I've got from going through this, and I feel it's been very valuable learning, that otherwise might have taken me many decades more to reach under normal circumstances.

Perhaps that's all easy for me to say 'cause I haven't had to go through dialysis yet, or any of that, and I'm getting a pre-emptive transplant from a live donor.

What is your take on this, everybody? Would you change it if you could?

I know what you're saying. Last week I became Board Chair of one of the ten largest dialysis providers in the country - a $70+ million business with over 500 employees (it was suppose to happen in October but the immediate past Chair needed some PTO). My mom is very proud, I get sunshine blown up my butt all the time, none of my peer group has achieved anything like it but give me a button to press and I would agree to be a fat dumb clueless urinator in second.