Amanda, what a shock to have lost a close friend, and so young too! Stay strong and try to realize from her perspective, she is no longer in pain...
Aw you people are awesome. I'm actually a bit surprised at how overwhelming the sadness is, but I realise there's a lot tied in with that. It's the loss of a good friend, first and foremost, as well as the fact that she was so young, the fact that she never had a bad word to say about anybody or anything, the fact that she NEVER complained during such a serious and lengthy illness, the fact that she had basically recovered and was getting better when suddenly struck down - and the fact that I am also a young person with a serious illness comes into play as well (tho I'm certainly not as ill as she was). I realise this is all part of a healthy grieving process, but I wasn't ready for the big crash that came on Friday, the day after the funeral. I haven't experienced this before. Everything obviously caught up at once and BANG - I went crashing. The support of you guys, and the fact that I feel comfortable posting this here when I'm still a newbie, is really important.