Thoughts on a subject?

[gkcoley]

I have been on dialysis 12 years but im new to the unit im at.  Apatient died a few days ago, which im used to seeing  as ive been on dialysis so long.  This is the first death ive seen at this unit and they did an understandable but possibly unthought out thing.  During his shift today, my shift, they draped his chair in a black cloth and put a white rose on it.  While i understand the feeling behind it, it seems unsympathetic to the other patients who face death everyday and dont need a reminder staring at them when they come in and while they sit on the treatment.  Once again i understand the vigil and the mourning.  The method seems a bit morbid and cruel to other patients.  Thoughts?

[Katonsdad]

Sounds YUCKY to me . I would have set a nice flower arrangement with a picture of the patient
and a small note expressing their grief in his passing.

[rsudock]

yeah I think the gesture behind it (honoring /mourning the person) is sweet, but to put the black cloth over the chair, may scare or depress other patients...it is a bit over the top. My last unit that had a small bulletin board in the lobby...if someone passed they would put the obituary on the bulletin board with a smiling picture....I thought that was nice....

xo,
R

[MooseMom]

I personally think this is dreadful and insensitive.

[Restorer]

That would make me uncomfortable.

[kevinswife]

My husband is a dialysis patient.  If I walked into his dialysis center and saw a black cloth draped over the chair, it would freak me out!  It would probably be less morbid if they had the rose in a vase next to the patient's picture.  Another idea is to pass around a card for the patients and staff to sign and express their sympathy to the family. 

[iketchum]

I am a Vet getting dialysis at a VA hospital. There have been four deaths last month and a chair draped with an American flag and the persons name each time. I think it is fine to honor these men like this.

[MooseMom]

I am a Vet getting dialysis at a VA hospital. There have been four deaths last month and a chair draped with an American flag and the persons name each time. I think it is fine to honor these men like this.

But this is not what happened at the original poster's clinic.

[sullidog]

I think the sympathy card signing and presenting it to the patients family would of been the way to go.

[needlephobic]

At the center I go to we had a patient pass away and they had her d machine turned off and a simple yellow rose in her chair. I thought it was nice

[Desert Dancer]

I can't imagine how that would affect a new patient walking in for the very first time. No, seems a little short-sighted and a bit insensitive to other patients. Something far more low-key would have been appropriate.

[natnnnat]

At Gregory's centre the machine would be empty, is all.  The staff would say, "so and so is in hospital" and then later they'd tell the other patients that they'd died.  The machine was empty at their normal time, which was a bit of a giveaway.  Later someone new would be in the chair.  He frowned at the thought of draping chairs.  They didn't make a big deal out of it because everyone was in the same boat. 

[galvo]

We've had 10 go this year. Sometimes, an 'In Memorium' card goes up on the notice board. That's about it.

[Ang]

when i was in clinic it was like wipe the chair and next one in

[okarol]

I often would ask what happened when a patient would not return, and the nurse would say that HIPPA rules prevented them from discussing other patients. They also moved patients around without notice, and getting your same spot every time was not guaranteed. There was no mention of anyone dying, no memorial, no card. It was very upsetting to me. Jenna was there when 2 patients died while on the machine, saw the paramedics and rescue attempts. That was very hard for her. Then after a day or two, there'd be someone new in the clinic.

[kristina]

I do hope this was meant as a sincere gesture...
...but it is strange all the same and makes me shiver.

I would have thought that people working in a Dialysis-Centre
would act in the same way as nurses do in a ward when a patient unfortunately dies –
that they discreetly deal with the matter
avoiding any distress to the other patients in the ward.

This gesture in your Dialysis-Unit is macabre and is “rubbing it in a bit”
and I find this very disturbing...

[Rerun]

I don't even like it when FLOWERS show up in the clilnic and they are from someone's funeral!  Gross!  Sorry but I don't like that.

[Whamo]

Flags on the chairs for VA hospitals sounds appropriate, but black sheets and a flower for others seems morbid.  A simple flower and photo tribute is nice.  I would think they would simply wipe off the chair, and let the next person have their turn.  Dialysis machines are meant to be used, not to become tombstone shadows.  I haven't seen anyone die at the center yet, but I've only been doing dialysis for 6 weeks. 

[justme15]

when i was in clinic it was like wipe the chair and next one in

this is how it was at my mom's clinic.

[fearless]

at my clinic, 2 or 3 people use the same chair/machine in a day.  And the times overlap for the people in the clinic at any given time.  It think there's about 25-30 stations in there.  I wouldn't want to come in and sit in a chair that had just had a black cloth draped over it for a few hours before I got there.  And I wouldn't want anybody to identify ME with a chair in that center!  It's not like it's my barca lounger in my den.  No, I am separate from the chair, and anyone who sat in that chair before me was separate from it too.  No black cloths.  Flowers and photos somewhere ELSE in the clinic.

[RichardMEL]

gee tough one. I don't know how I'd feel if I was in a clinic that did that. I guess I would understand and appreciate the gesture in the way it was intended, but at the same time be very much extra aware and sensitive to my own mortality - it would be  much more difficult for some patients I think - specially those sick or in similar situations to the one just lost.

In my unit nobody had dedicated chairs - it was kind of first in, best dressed sort of thing, so that would have never happened.

I would have though a gesture perhaps outside the treatment area, maybe on a notice board or as you come in or something would be more appropriate - don't try and hide what happened (everyone would know about it anyway) but have an appropriate place, like in the lobby or something, so folks don't stare at it through their session and be constantly reminded. That's just me though.

[Riki]

In my clinic, there are 9 chairs, and we don't always sit in the same spot.  You go where you are set up, and that's generally decided the night before, when trying to figure a spot for up to 18 patients per day, and get everybody on and off in a meaningful time frame, and for those of us who are on in the afternoon, off before a certain time in the evening.

When someone dies, most times we don't know unless someone sees an obituary in the paper.  When someone I'd known for many years had died, we didn't know until months later, when Mom found a memorial for her, while looking for something else.  The nurses said nothing, and since she'd been on home dialysis before, we thought that she'd gone back to that.

Because of the way they seem to do things, and the fact that they'd probably need the chair, I don't see them draping the chair with anything, except for a sheet, readying it for the next patient

[Subeat]

I'm a short timer, so haven't experienced the death of a fellow patient yet.  I have seen a couple taken away by EMTs, but they returned a few days later.  I think some type of low key tribute would be appropriate, but a chair draped in black just seems morbid to me.  And definitely not something I would want to be looking at for 4 hours. 

[gkcoley]

Thank you for all the responses...i see most people feel the way that i do.  Understand the feelings behind it, but it was expressed in the wrong way