Everything has changed

[cariad]

In Oz the woman would have been charged with assault.

That sounds fair to me!

Last week I received more proof of why I just cannot go on living like this. I suddenly found myself starring in a kind of horror film.

Aidan had been invited to his friend's house for a late night watching the All-Star game. These friends were going to drop Aidan off around 9:45, so I left the front light on and the front door unlocked just in case I was busy and did not hear the bell.

I was on my computer around 9:40 when I hear the doorbell sounding over and over, like a child playing. Ding dong ding dong ding dong ding dong ding dong.

It was loud and I was annoyed because little Elliot had just gone to sleep. I almost shouted "It's open, Aidan" but decided I should really at least thank the parents face to face, so called out 'Aidan' in a bit of a scolding tone and went down to answer the door. I see a man standing way out on the pavement in front of my house. I call out "Hello?!" and he blurts out a semi-intelligible story about There was this guy .... a drunk .... he's a drunken bum .... black shorts.... I caught him behind my house.... I chased him out of there, and he ran back here, either here or the next one.
Me: What?! Him: He's hiding behind your house. I called the police, I don't know where they are.

My head was spinning. My first thought was Oh my God, Aidan is due back any second! What if they inadvertently block the trespasser's only exit with the car and he becomes violent?

I thank the neighbour and immediately run up to the first floor to grab my panic button. I then have this thing clutched in my fist for the rest of the evening as I'm running around trying to think of what to do next. I run to the back door and make sure it is locked, find my keys to lock my car that is sitting in back, turn off lights in an attempt to see if I can see him back there. As I'm on the ground floor I can see the neighbour still out there saying This is an Italian neighbourhood! Fifty years ago we would have killed guys like you.

Then I begin to wonder if the neighbour is just a paranoid racist. Even though I had all the lights out on the ground floor, he looks in my window and says "He's back there."

I immediately decided TO HELL WITH THIS and grabbed my landline and called the police. For the second time in my life, I am so glad I am not famous and that 911 call will never be released to the public. I was so confused, not sure what I was scared about or if I should be scared, but all I could think was that I wanted someone here to help me deal with this and Gwyn is in California. I almost started crying down the phone to the dispatcher. He was really nice and said he would send someone right away. Then I thought Must stop Aidan from coming home now. So I grabbed the mobile - I hate mine, I can never find what I need quickly - am desperately pressing buttons and swearing and hitting cancel and starting over. I called the friend's dad - no answer. I called the mother and before she can say much I say "Is Aidan on his way yet?" She must have said no but I couldn't really comprehend much, so I just poured out the story and she said "They're still here. I won't let them leave." Then she texts me to say that she feels so bad for me and wants to help. (Ah, so sweet!)

Cops arrive, I text the mom to tell her this. The cops cannot understand what I am saying - I think I'm being clear, but it's all so confusing. They go back behind the house and return to say there is no one there. I ask if the neighbour is just crazy but they don't really answer. Then a second squad car pulls up and the male officer goes over to talk to them. They tell me that the person in question was a local homeless man and that this neighbour beat him up. Oh! How awful! I don't know what to say and just want to go to bed so I ask if they need anything further from me and they so no, but they seem to be expecting something from me. They were staring at me in what seemed to be disbelief as I walked up to the house. So strange. It was all so odd. Aidan came home, the dad said to call them anytime if I needed to talk. I have never been so relieved to hear that inexplicably British voice on our alarm system announce "Doors and windows on."

The next morning we're coming down the drive and I see something hidden behind the branches of a little tree that needs to be trimmed. I exclaim "Oh! That guy!" It is a little pack of some sort. I ask Aidan to get out and tell him to kick it onto the patch of public property grass in front of the house. I don't want him touching it because it's probably dirty, but I want the guy to be able to find it if he walks by. Aidan does this. I return home after dropping them off and it is still there. Later I walk to the post office and when I return it is gone.

No word from England yet. But this is why no matter what, we are going to be living with Gwyn before the summer is out.

[okarol]

Awful. When my husband used to travel for business I would sometimes have to call the police - once a guy was trying to get in - thought he was at his girlfriends house. Took the screen off and tried to open a window on the front of the house. He was escorted away but that kept me up all night!!
I hope your little family is reunited soon. 

[cariad]

Awful. When my husband used to travel for business I would sometimes have to call the police - once a guy was trying to get in - thought he was at his girlfriends house. Took the screen off and tried to open a window on the front of the house. He was escorted away but that kept me up all night!!
I hope your little family is reunited soon. 

Thanks, Karol! I am not sure how these things always seem to happen at the worst time. I really like having an alarm system connected to the police, though, and hope to find something similar in the UK.

Speaking of, this thread has been going on for nearly a year, and I am just so thankful and humbled by the overwhelming and immediate outpouring of support I received here from the moment I announced that Gwyn had lost his job. This has been a challenging (not always in a bad way) year for me and my family, and 5 years ago I never would have believed that an internet site would be the most effective support system in my life. But it's true. I feel I was able to rise to this challenge in large part because I truly felt that there were dozens at IHD standing behind me and cheering me on. Thank you all, one million times and more.

The job offer is not signed nor sealed yet, but it has been delivered to Gwyn. We are England bound.

[jbeany]

 

Watch the road! 

(My family's shorthand for Be careful, Drive safely, Come back soon, I'll miss you, and - because we aren't given to saying it out loud - I love you.  It's what my grandmother used to say to us when she sent us across the road to the mail box to get the mail for her.)

[gothiclovemonkey]

That sounds horrifying!
If it makes you feel better, about having to call 911, i once called, thinking someone was IN my basement of my home... And at the time my ex bf was causing me a lot of trouble, being violent and threatening me, so I couldnt be sure. I even TRIED opening the basement door and saying Hey, are you down there?? I waited... and heard What I THOUGHT was someone sitting on the bed i had down there.......... so I said THIS ISNT FUNNY i ran outside with phone in hand, called the police, they came in. They too heard somethig, so with hands on their weapons they open the door to my basement... suddenly a loud noise ifpsdpsdogpkskgpsdgods out shoots a freakin bird...................... yes. a bird. in my basement.
scared the crap out of me and the cops though!

Hopefully you get to find somewhere good to be soon!

[cariad]

Thanks, jbeany! That expression is adorable. I recently read Cocktail Hour Under the Tree of Forgetfulness by an author who grew up all over Africa and her mother had a toast that I think I will steal for our use: To us! There's none like us, and if there is, they're all dead! It suits us somehow.

Oh, GLM, poor thing. My late uncle tells a great story of the time he had to phone the police about a prowler and the cop drew a gun and nearly shot Al. Al is his freakishly lifelike sculpture of a handyman. Would have been a memorable case for the insurance claims adjustor! I was sorting through old pics this afternoon and came across a fantastic snap of Al, Gwyn and Aidan. I'll have to post it when I get the chance.

Gwyn gave notice and they've asked him to consider a promotion and over 20% pay rise. If only this company were stable.

[cariad]

My son's best friend left the state this morning. I somehow inadvertently managed to put together a dream night to send the little guy off cross country.

My auntie has owned a share of season tickets to the Brewers for years and gave my family 4 tickets to yesterday's game because she knew my parents would be in town and Aidan lives and breathes sports.

So, I know little Liot does not care all that much about baseball. As an early birthday present to Aidan I suggested Liot let Aidan invite a friend in his stead. Aidan invited C because we had been told that little J would be leaving Friday. Thursday I hear that J will be at the summer program Friday because "the movers need more time". Having no idea what that meant, I mentioned it to my parents who were going to accompany C and Aidan to the game. My father offered that if J could come along, he would take the 3 boys on is own. So, I emailed J's mother saying I so hate to even mention this because I don't want you to feel obligated to stay just for this, but here is the offer. She called me and started with "please be honest..." and asked if J could spend the night here. It really made perfect sense - they were going to be at a hotel and her son would not be back from the Brewer game until 11PM. So I arranged to have both boys spend the night, but first they got to watch the Brewers play the Nationals from the second row behind the visitor dugout.

My son can talk some serious trash, and he apparently shouted to one man on the Nationals "Hey [whatever his surname is] strike out for me like you did last inning, 'kay?" It was dismissed as coincidence, but let's examine the evidence: Brewers play the Nationals without my son there, Brewers are crushed 8-2. Brewers play the Nationals with my son wearing the opposing team down with incessant chatter: Brewers shut them down, 6 to ZERO. Aidan is fairly certain they could hear him. After the game, C shouted out to his hero Corey Hart who was across the diamond near his own dugout, and apparently Corey Hart turned to their section and gave them the peace sign which made little C deliriously happy.

The boys came home and were talking a mile a minute at me. Even little J who I thought did not really like me wanted to show me his baseball cards, which was so cute. Then even though I had arranged for them to get sole use of the bedroom with two comfortable beds, they begged to stay in the playroom. Everyone loves the playroom. In the morning C's mother dropped by to take them to the park and say goodbye to J's family. There were so many tears this morning, it was really more than I could stand. J's mother grabbed the three boys and said that if you had friends you had everything, and all four of them were crying. C's mother and I were tearing up as well. Then we get to go through this all again on August 21.

I have not told the boys that Gwyn will be home this Saturday. Aidan still thinks Gwyn will miss his birthday. I have ordered a cake from Whole Foods, but I think I am going to call to change the order so that it can feed all the kids in Aidan's summer program room. Right now it is to be a cake shaped like a soccer ball. I want it to sit atop a sheet cake decorated to look like a field with a Welsh flag lying across the field. I don't know if they can manage it, though. I should post a pic of Liot's cake - it was barely a step above cake wrecks, but there is no arguing with the taste. Everyone says that Whole Foods cakes are the best birthday cake they've ever had.

[MooseMom]

I went to an Astros vs Brewers game at Miller Park several years ago, and Miller Park is absolutely beautiful!  I'm so glad the boys had a good time but am sad that it was all such a bittersweet occasion.

I can't wait to hear about Aidan's birthday!  I'm thrilled that his dad will be in attendance after all.  That's terrific!  It will be a special, special day.

[cariad]

Thanks, MM, birthday girl!

Oh, it is a stunning park. It was pouring that afternoon and my father kept talking about the game being rained out and finally it occurred to me to say "Wait, there's a roof...." I didn't think games were rained out any more because I just assumed that if Milwaukee's ballpark had a roof, then every other city must have a roof as well. Guess not! Rain cancellations just seem so antiquated to me. Forgot to ask my father if the roof was shut or not but he was floored by this news, and he usually does his best to never show any surprise for any reason.

Behold the cake. I speak the truth, do I not? I am 95% certain that those are supposed to be sea lions, but where they got the nerve to charge me a $15 art fee with a straight face I'll never know! 

[okarol]

Love the story and photos of boys at the baseball game.

Sorry but had to laugh at the cake 

[cariad]

Here are the latest cake pics. The Welsh Flag cake was visually stunning but the flavours were not what I had ordered. Soccer ball cake was layer upon layer of chocolate madness.

Gwyn is home. Wish I could post video on here because the boys did not know that he was arriving, I had told them that he would be here next Wednesday. Saturday was right before Aidan's birthday and I told him that I had to rush out to buy him a present and could he and Liot stay behind and just watch some television or something. Then I told him I had to bring the gift up past them, could he and Liot close their eyes. (Elliot is one of those that doesn't want to know things if he's not allowed to talk about them - he knows his secret-keeping limitations! ) Then I went into the playroom with video camera on and Gwyn stood next to me. I told them they could open their eyes and Aidan turned round first and let out a startled yelp. Liot had not yet opened his eyes, so Aidan cried out "Elliot! It's Dad!"

Gwyn and I usually make a shirt for the boys to wear on their birthdays to announce to everyone that this is a momentous occasion. We threw a load of ideas around and finally settled on the one Aidan is wearing in the pic. Gwyn gets credit for the perfect execution of it. He stayed up until 1AM toiling away. There is a big 10 on the shirt, too, placed off to one side just like the baseball jersey. On the back it has Aidan's stats as if it were the back of a baseball card.

We are spending our time trying to tie up loose ends. Liot sees his best friend from public school next weekend. This boy's family is taking him to the Wisconsin Dells with them. Aidan had his final beach soccer session last Tuesday and Liot played with his friend M for several hours in Lake Michigan. The coach brought beers for the adults and so Gwyn and I sat on towels in the sand, drinking and talking to friends and acquaintances.

[jbeany]

 

Love the shirt idea!  And it looks like everyone had a fabulous time, too!

[Poppylicious]

Mmmm, cake ... 

[cariad]

  America!

Flight's delayed so very nearly drunk at the airport lounge. 2 nights booked at a hotel, and then? No plan, just enjoying the adventure of the freefall.

Iechyd da, lovelies! 
We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know wheeeennnnnnn....

[jbeany]

Not so fast!  IHD works in the UK, ya know!

 

[RichardMEL]

Not so fast!  IHD works in the UK, ya know!

 

yes well the whole thing crapped out for me last night(my time) due to some kind of DNS resolution issue - and right when I was in the middle of a post(luckily I saved it )

[monrein]

  to all of your family cariad.  So very glad that I had to chance to meet you and Gwyn last year in Vegas.   

[willowtreewren]

Have a lovely, lovely time!

And expect a visit from your Tennessee friends! 

Aleta

[okarol]

Hope you'll keep us updated. Was wondering about your follow up with your transplant team, as yous was a unique transplant. Will they want to see at some interval or just get lab results sent to them?

[Poppylicious]

Hope you'll keep us updated. Was wondering about your follow up with your transplant team, as yous was a unique transplant. Will they want to see at some interval or just get lab results sent to them?

I was wondering about that too. 

  cariad! (I'm assuming you're over here now, anyway!)

 

[cariad]

WAKE UP, AMERICA!!!!

We arrived and I am teetering on the brink of an anxiety attack. Wrong visa so I have to go back to the US within 6 months to sort that out which is not helping. Gwyn has asked his workplace for someone to talk us through this. Where are we going to live, what schools will the kids go to, do I have to get their passports first, can I get full access to NHS on this silly visitor's visa? Then there are the thousand little Milwaukee issues we have. Karol, I've been so bad. I have not had my SOC labs in almost 3 months. They are fit to be tied at Northwestern but I planned this all wrong obviously and we were off Gwyn's insurance before I thought to get them done. If the NHS will do it for me, I will have them done Tuesday (I think Monday is some sort of bank holiday because Gwyn does not start until after.)

Need to be out of this hotel in a few mintues, so will be back to have a good cry when I get the opportunity. We are off to a self-catering cottage in the country for a week - no idea if there will be wifi or anything, but I'll pop in if there is.

Ta!

[MaryD]

 

And use the cottage to catch your breath

[Poppylicious]

I think Monday is some sort of bank holiday because Gwyn does not start until after.

Indeed, and it's raining. It always does on August Bank Holiday weekend!

 

[cariad]

Made it to the cottage. I thnk tomorrow we will officially be on British time from here forward.

England's become really Americanized. Excuse me, some of us are trying to leave that mess behind, would appreciate your cooperation. Please go back to calling french fries 'chips' for a start.

I will go mad if I don't find a decent ceylon mango or similar for my iced tea, though. I asked at a Costa if they could do iced tea and they proudly stated that indeed they could. Then they went reaching for the syrups and I brought the whole thing to a halt. We found peanut butter and jelly fairly easily for the boys at least. We forgot about the stupidity that is the new credit card system, though. Last trip (almost 2 years ago, so I guess it's not all that new) we ran into this issue but it was OK because we did not need to use cards much. Now because we don't have that chip in our credit cards no place can accept it. We had to ask them to take the beer out of our shopping at the Aldi because there was no cashpoint and our cards would not work. The silly thing is, it keeps happening and we keep forgetting and blindly handing them our cards.

Still have little idea which town we're going to live in.