I just need a freakin' break!

[TiffanyJean]

    A Rant about how much I hate everything right now!!!


Ok so my lovely husband tells me this morning that (sorry for this but...) he has blood in his stool. and that he has for the last three days! So i call our neph to see if we should come in or what to do; they say to call our "primary care physician" so we call and get an appointment for the morning and just as we are walking out the door the Dr. calls and says go to the ER instead. This stupid doctor never wants to deal with Richie, he always tells us to go see someone else or something! SO FREAKING IRRITATING!!!! now we know that Richie is like the only kidney patient that hes ever had, but its like come on!

So we got to the ER at like 10:30am and once they took Richie back, they drew blood and all the tests came back that he was fine! so finally at 1:30pm (can i just throw it out there that medical care attention in the ER is so ridiculously slow!) so then they decided that since all the test came back fine that we would be able to go, and then see a GI doc in the next couple of days.

after about another hour of waiting around the doctor comes in and says "oh the GI Doc can see you now..." so Richie had to get cleaned out, and then get the scope up there to see whats wrong.

hemorrhoids internally....

so thanks to our stupid PCP we had to spend ALL FREAKIN day in the ER to find out that he has hemorrhoids!   

Ok so here's the thing thats really a bummer - we haven't had a vacation since June of 2007, before we got married. We haven't had a honeymoon because we were going to take in during the summer last year. then we have been trying to take a vacation since the beginning of this year. every time we are going to get clearance  SOMETHING comes up with his health; well since his health is most important, and not within his control (most of it anyways) we postpone. Its SOOOOO irritating that we cant just take a bit of a break!!

I need a break! I'm so tried of caring about everything, and taking care of him. and dealing with incompetent people!   

 ahhhhh i feel so much better just getting all that out! thanks in advance for reading/listening.


TJ

[Hanify]

Come for a holiday to New Zealand!  it's not that far from you, and there'll be great deals on at the mo.  You're welcome to stay here - we've got a spare room.  I mean it.  We'd have a blast - altjough we're heading into winter so I can't promise much with the weather.

[Sluff]

TJ  hopefully things will smooth out in the near future so you can go on your dream vacation. Things will get better. 

[cherpep]

You do need a break!!!  Maybe you should plan something small - just a weekend somewhere to just get away and be with each other.  If that goes well, maybe the bigger vacation won't seem like such an impossibility. 

Hope things get better for ya. 

[mcmkids]

Oh TJ, come talk to me! Medicine on the whole is awful (forgive me, I am a nurse so I can pick on my own!) There is a "specilaist" for everything and by the time you run around making appointments, having tests and getting seen, you are exhausted and your insurance card is worn out. Sorry that your primary doc is such a twit. The PCP should see you and order the appropriate tests. If he has seen you and the problem can't wait, then I agree with sending to the ER. Our PCP has called specialists himself during an appointment and has gotten my husband seen that same day when he felt it was warranted. Do you have a minute? Here is my story. Last year for no reason, my husband was showing sudden symptoms of heart failure and I brought him in to see our PCP. He not only did an EKG in the office and drew blood, he called a cardiologist himself and got Matt in to see him in an hour. A work up later and it was discovered that he had a malignant tumor sitting in his left atrium (I am not kidding) that was blocking blood flow. Had we waited, he probably would have had a stroke or a heart attack. As it turns out, he had open heart surgery to rmove the tumor and after that chemo. There is a lot more to the story, but that is the basics. If you need to scream, here is my e-mail address: mcmkids@comcast.net. I would be happy to hear from you! Take care of yourself! You are right about the ER, I was just in the ER with my dughter a couple of weeks ago when she injured her ankle and the wait time is ridiculous!! 






EDITED: Removed Color Prompt - Sluff/Admin

[The Wife]

All of us caregivers understand exactly what you are going through. 

Big hugs to you...

[Romona]

You are amazing. I am glad your husband has you for suport. 

[Mizar]

You do need a Break. Just do it, even if it's only for a Few Hours. Take Yourself to the Library or out to Lunch, or Shopping for a New little Something. Do it by Yourself, so You don't have to Talk to anyone else, or think about what they want to do. Be Kind to You. I found out, I could not take care of Someone else, unless, I took some Time, to take care of Me.  Take Care.

[G-Ma]

What Mizar and others have said is right on target....Take a time out for yourself...even just minutes.


 

[Brightsky69]

Wow...sounds like you do need a vacation. I agree that you guys should take a longweekend or something...just to relax and not think about anything but doing something fun.

[TiffanyJean]

 

Thanks for all the support everyone! Today I took my self out for lunch and a movie.     It was nice to just sit and relax and not think about all the follow up appointments.

We will be trying to get vacation clearance again next week; if we can't get that then we may try to just take a long weekend off island, just to get away from everything for a few days.

thanks for listening to all this; its just been such a long year and a half - we are just praying for a break. today we were saying that we wished when he was diagnosed they handed us a handbook "what to expect when you have kidney failure" or something! It seems like every day, week, and month we have to learn something new about ESRD

TJ

[greco02]

Here is a hint.  If you don't want to wait in the ER waiting room call an ambulance to take you there.  No, really!   

Here is more info (you may not want to hear)....with so many people getting laid off and losing their healthcare benefits the ER's are turning into primary care centers over flowing with colds and flu's.  Then, keep in mind, all those patients with colds and flu virus' don't pay.  Yes, I work in healthcare in San Diego.  I heard from a friend at a different facility that for every 1% raise in the unemployment rate they loose $500,000 per year.   Add to that the fact that we are a border town and, well you get the picture.   

So, again...call an ambulance.  The healthcare system can be very frustrating.  I especially like it when I get treated like a real patient and not an employee...that gives me a great picture of how we treat patients.   Good luck...keep a notebook of all the gory details, and take care of yourself.  Your sweetie would want you to.

[cherpep]

Before calling an ambulance - be sure to read your insurance notes.  My insurance doesn't pay for an ambulance unless they agree it was absolutely necessary, which is highly a matter of opinion on the side of the insurance. 

[TiffanyJean]

Here is a hint.  If you don't want to wait in the ER waiting room call an ambulance to take you there.  No, really!   

Greco - If I thought it would work then I might in the future; but from the seziure he had at the end of Feb. we still have about a $200 ambulance bill. I don't need another bill - we have more than enough.

Otheriwse things have been going ok, not too much happening, I'm really hopeful that we will be getting our gym clearance at our next doc appointment, and possibly getting travel clearance as well. What do you all on the mainland think is going on with the swine flu? Think traveling would be ok in mid july or august sometime?We are planning on going to Sacramento, CA to visit family, and then to Southern CA to visit more family as well as maybe go to disney land for a day or two. If we can't make it durring the summer sometime, then we might try Christmas time. Opinions? Concerns that we should think about?

Much Thanks!

TJ

[greco02]

Southern CA doesn't get too hot until the end of July.  Then it remains hot until late September and sometimes into October.  The flu scare has settled down.   Don't know much about Sacramento.  Just beautiful San Diego.  That's my hometown for many years and I love it here. 

[bountyhunter_ga]

Boy ,does that ring a bell, Full time work, trying for a promotion,garden,kid getting married and a dinner at our house for about 85 people.
You know my wife is great being in law enforcement for about as long as I have there is always something, being cut, broken bones, accident's in patrol vehicles etc.  We do live like no one else except out brothers and sisters in harms way in the military.
Growing  up together sure makes a difference.

After you get 60 you are all cried out, so you think. But my wife is always there for me, over the last 30 years its always been for me. I need to do something really nice for her. I think after I get my new Kidney we will just go somewhere alone.

 We all need a break but the caretaker I think need more she or he just places themselves in our environment only because we are married and care. God bless my wife and to those that do understand us that are going through this test of life.

[lodisweetthing]

   A Rant about how much I hate everything right now!!! :rant;i feel you i do...my hubby is blind and i got to do all the talking driving ordering and meds he takes 12 pills in the morn 3 in afternnoon and 8 at night with 2 insulin aday and epo shots for his anemeia dealing withe 8 or more docs and it just keeps adding on no family or friends want to help so i can get a break it s all i have everyday..dealing with his special diets as well scince he has heart and digestive illnesses too .. without me he would be dead no one wants to help and i am ill now but i dont have the choice to stay in bed all day i still got to take care of him..pain or not copd acting up or not i have a syst the size of a baseball on my right ovary and left kidney but no help for me ...


Ok so my lovely husband tells me this morning that (sorry for this but...) he has blood in his stool. and that he has for the last three days! So i call our neph to see if we should come in or what to do; they say to call our "primary care physician" so we call and get an appointment for the morning and just as we are walking out the door the Dr. calls and says go to the ER instead. This stupid doctor never wants to deal with Richie, he always tells us to go see someone else or something! SO FREAKING IRRITATING!!!! now we know that Richie is like the only kidney patient that hes ever had, but its like come on!

So we got to the ER at like 10:30am and once they took Richie back, they drew blood and all the tests came back that he was fine! so finally at 1:30pm (can i just throw it out there that medical care attention in the ER is so ridiculously slow!) so then they decided that since all the test came back fine that we would be able to go, and then see a GI doc in the next couple of days.

after about another hour of waiting around the doctor comes in and says "oh the GI Doc can see you now..." so Richie had to get cleaned out, and then get the scope up there to see whats wrong.

hemorrhoids internally....

so thanks to our stupid PCP we had to spend ALL FREAKIN day in the ER to find out that he has hemorrhoids!   

Ok so here's the thing thats really a bummer - we haven't had a vacation since June of 2007, before we got married. We haven't had a honeymoon because we were going to take in during the summer last year. then we have been trying to take a vacation since the beginning of this year. every time we are going to get clearance  SOMETHING comes up with his health; well since his health is most important, and not within his control (most of it anyways) we postpone. Its SOOOOO irritating that we cant just take a bit of a break!!

I need a break! I'm so tried of caring about everything, and taking care of him. and dealing with incompetent people!   

 ahhhhh i feel so much better just getting all that out! thanks in advance for reading/listening.


TJI

I

[aharris2]

Here is a hint.  If you don't want to wait in the ER waiting room call an ambulance to take you there.  No, really!   

How to be seen quickly at the ER? We can add to the list:

1. Seize in the waiting room (very dramatic!)
2. Arrive with chest pains (an oldie but goodie, watch as the staff becomes a well-oiled machine).
3. Present with plummeting blood pressure (see their faces change as they check it again!)

(...sorry but I'm busy right now, I'll freak later...)

[marti824]

Wonderful words Bountyhunter.  I also have a very loving and supportive spouse.  I know I couldn't have gotten through any of the past three years without him.  God bless all of you caregivers!

[TiffanyJean]

Aloha All!!

So in the last several weeks that I havent been on the boards (I have SOO much to read and catch up on!) Richie's vomiting issues have been fixed with the help of Reglan; we have been granted gym clearance as well travel clearance! Vacation planed for 9/11 - 9/21 to Northern CA!!!    Yes we are excited - but i am REALLY excited i havent seen most of my family since our wedding in 2007. plus both my grandfathers are ill; so need to see them....

besides the good... Richie has been very dehydrated lately - how do you guys cope with the heat?! hawaii is hotter than its ever been - 90s - which for us is crazy hot!

So I finally found a half good thing about PD - you can easily have TONS of boxes for moving! So we found a nice (little) ground floor apartment; which our delivery guy is very grateful for - we used to live in a second floor apartment. plus its much easier on me since i had to take up most of the groceries and anything we'd get from costco; as well as better for richie when he's feeling crappy.

Well i think that is all the news - and now off to bed - getting up early tomorrow for a garage sale

Tiffany Jean

[okarol]

  All of that sounds great Tiffany (well except for the dehydration, of course.) 
I am glad you could plan a trip - it's always so much fun to have something to look forward to!
 

[bountyhunter_ga]

It has been very hot here in Georgia. My wife has been doing all the outside work, getting ready for my daughters wedding Aug 1st.
It makes me feel very bad knowing things are the way they are today, but life goes on and our problem can't always be up front.

I found out washing clothes and doing all the cooking really helps, however it will never be the same.
 There is a special place for the people  who help us, God I can't say enough and thanks to all of you who talk to me.

[Brightsky69]

Cool!!  You met Paula Deen!

[G-Ma]

What did I miss??? Who met Paula Deen?? where was I???