Brother's plea for kidney tears at teen

[okarol]

Brother's plea for kidney tears at teen

Sibling’s addictions make Trevecca athlete hesitant to donate organ

By MIKE ORGAN
Staff Writer

Tim Dunn disagrees with people who call him selfish.

For months, the 19-year-old Trevecca University baseball player has refused to donate a kidney to his older brother, Josh, who has kidney failure and must undergo dialysis three times a week to keep the toxic buildup in his body from killing him.

Cocaine, methamphetamine, marijuana, cigarettes and alcohol might have helped ruin the one good kidney Josh was born with. And while Josh, 21, says he's been clean for about two weeks, Tim is afraid of jeopardizing his baseball career — and maybe his life — by giving his brother a priceless gift that might be squandered.

Their plight has made them the subject of a segment on the Dr. Phil television show, tested the limits of brotherly love, and left the teenage athlete with a suffocating dilemma.

"Some people have said it seems like I'm putting baseball ahead of my family," Tim Dunn said, "but I don't look at it that way."

Without a new kidney, Josh will have to continue to have dialysis for the rest of his life. His father, mother and grandmother have all been rejected as donors because of medical conditions, leaving Tim as the most likely match.

But this week, it remained unclear how long Tim is prepared to wait before deciding whether to donate the organ.

"I guess my timetable is when I am 100 percent certain that he has changed,'' said Tim, who is awaiting results to see if he is indeed a match. "I don't want to give him one of my kidneys if he hasn't changed. That would be like throwing it away."

Drug use left rift

Even before learning he was ill in April, Josh's drug habit had strained his relationships with those closest to him, he said. First his mother threw him out. Then Josh moved in with his father, who bought him a car and tried to help his son get back on track.

But the lure of drugs was too strong, Josh said, and his father asked for the car back and told him to go elsewhere.

With nowhere else to go, he moved in with his girlfriend. The drugs and lies continued, and she kicked him out earlier this month, he said.

At rock bottom, Josh entered an alcohol and drug rehabilitation program near his hometown in Bardwell, Ky., on the Kentucky-Missouri border, about 160 miles from Nashville.

"It's done so much good for me that I asked if I could start coming every week for counseling,'' Josh said. "I am learning so much about why I started doing drugs and why it is so hard for me to quit. It's changed my life. It really has."

Though it's only been weeks, Josh thinks he's turned a corner but understands his brother's reluctance.

"I was a mess. I know that now," he said. "I wouldn't give me a kidney, either, if I was him. And now I have a lot to prove to him.

"I am through with drugs and all that stuff, but I wouldn't blame him if he didn't believe me."

Other factors in the mix

Ultimately, Tim may not be the only one deciding whether he'll give his brother his kidney.

"Even if (Tim) wanted to give the kidney away, a standard transplant program wouldn't give it to somebody who is on drugs,'' said Dr. Hal Helderman, medical director of the Vanderbilt Transplant Center. "Just pot alone is not a turndown. But things like cocaine and amphetamines — if you are on those you would not be given a transplant."

As for Tim's concern for his baseball future, Helderman said, if he is deemed healthy enough to be a donor he has nothing to worry about.

"Life expectancy for a kidney transplant donor is longer than the average person of the same age," he said. "We take only the top healthiest slice of the general population to be donors and that person was so super-healthy that they lived longer."

Many high performance athletes, including basketball players Alonzo Mourning and Sean Elliott, and Olympic snowboarder Chris Klug, have competed with one kidney.

Tim says some of his relatives have been unable to understand how he could refuse to help save his brother.

"I moved down to Nashville so I haven't really been around him much, but I feel like he's made a little improvement," Tim said. "I don't know how much exactly. He's been staying at home more, so I feel like he's starting to improve."

Mom sought out Dr. Phil

The sensitive decision has taken a toll on their mother, Vicki, who said she was out of answers when she wrote a letter to the Dr. Phil show as a last-ditch effort to help her family find a solution.

During the show's taping Aug. 20 in Los Angeles, Tim and Josh sat side by side between host Phil McGraw and guest host, televangelist Bishop T.D. Jakes. Josh said on the program that he was going to clean up but his latest relapse occurred before the show aired on Tuesday.

"I know Timothy gets frustrated with Josh, but I've told Timothy to try to understand what it's like,'' Vicki Dunn said this week. "I tell him, 'You have to try to see it from your brother's point of view. With everything that's piled on him, going to the doctor, watching what you eat, making sure you take your medicine, and going to dialysis three days a week and having them stick two needles in you and sit there for three and a half hours.'

"I say, 'You can't imagine what that's like and what it does to you psychologically. And when there's something that you can do to make you forget about that even for 30 minutes, it's tempting.'"

She refuses to take sides.

"I've agonized over this, but I've made my peace with it,'' Vicki said. "Because they're both over 18 years old and it's not my decision to make, I have decided all I can do is help them have as many facts and consider all the options and make as wise a decision as they can possibly make."

http://tennessean.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080925/SPORTS060406/809250351/1002/SPORTS

[willieandwinnie]

I think Dr. Phil could of done a better job and informed people better about kidney disease. okarol, where do find all these articles? Very enlightening. 

[okarol]

I search everyday. Seems like there is always something regarding kidneys or dialysis. I guess that's good - the more awareness the better!

[mmmmdeedee]

Hi guys:

Long time no write but I have a dilemma.

My friend's brother had knee surgery about 2 months ago. At that time they found out he had a tumor on his kidney. Subsequently they removed the kidney and all seems clear now. He is going to have another surgery for his other knee in November. So for at least 2-3 months he has been off of work.

Problem is - he uses cocaine (or crank or crack or whatever it is now). He used it before his first surgery (didn't tell the doctors) and when they took our his kidney, he also didn't tell him.

He just found out that his createnine levels were high - she did not know what the numbers were though. So he is going to a specialist today to see what is going on.

The rest of the family is trying to pretend that his drug use is not affecting anything. That the two aren't related and therefore do not want to bring up his use to him or the doctor. They are one of those families that don't like to "stir up trouble." They sweep everything under the rug so everything appears to be great! 

Anyway, her sister (my friend also) asked her friend who works at a doctor's office, and she told her that cocaine has no effect on the kidneys! So now they are mad at my friend because she brought all this up and causing all the ruckus for nothing.

Now she is afraid to say anything because she is considered the @#$# for even bringing it up. And the brother denies doing any drugs at all!

Anyway, does anyone know of any literature, article, or anything else that states the effect of cocaine on kidneys? Let alone only having one left to deal with!

Thanks guys!

[willieandwinnie]

deedee. Long time no see, or hear in this case. My husband received his transplant 13 months ago. When he was admitted for transplant, I asked a bunch of questions and was told by the transplant coordinator that the deceased donor was a crack user. That concerned me and the transplant doctor said that crack does not effect the kidneys. Heroin is the biggie to kidneys. I did some snooping and found this on the Kidney Foundation site while waiting for the kidney from Texas, I asked more questions and the doctor assured me they would check the kidney well before it was transplanted. Hope this helps you some or gives you a direction to go looking for yourself. Good Luck and don't be such a stranger. 

http://www.kidney.org/atoz/atozItem.cfm?id=44

[paris]

I watched that particular Dr. Phil show.  I didn't think they spent enough time giving good information.  And at no time, did they ask if the brother had been approved to receive a transplant.  With his drug use, he may not even be eligible for a new kidney.   I was dissappointed with the show.  No one should ever feel pressured to donate.  It is a very personal decision. 

[mmmmdeedee]

Thanks for the info. I would think Cocaine would have an efect on the kidney due to the fact that it raises blood pressure. I just found out that his doctor told him yesterday that his remaining kidney is working at 40%. Not good. He is going to see a specialist on Monday to decide which way to go. But he is still not telling the docs his lifestyle habits. But if it comes down to one of his siblings donating, I would be very concerned if he is not clean at that time. It would seem like a waste to me. But how do you tell a brother no. Especially when the family is pretending it's not even a problem?