Life is fragile

[st789]

Do most of you feel life is fragile when you depend on the machine to sustain life?  The patient really does not know when is his last day on this earth.  Infections, cardiact arrest, seizure, and etc.,

[Sluff]

Try to live each day as it might be your last. Try not to dwell on it but know that it could. It bothers me more everyday when i pick up the paper and another teenager has died either from drugs or drinking and driving or just plain driving too fast. Young and full of life, now that is a waste.

[Bette]

I feel this very much.  I try very hard to live in the moment and to enjoy everything fully.  I especially try to create memories my daughter in case I am not around when she is older.  I can't really talk about this with anyone in real life because they think I am being dramatic, but I just think that they are all in denial.  I think I am dealing with the truth of the situation more then they are, but it is too painful for them to see things as they are.

I am not afraid of dying, I'm just not ready for it yet!  One of the reasons I took disability instead of pushing myself to go back to work was so that I could spend this time with my family.  I'm going to enjoy this summer with my Little girl.

[st789]

Yep, try not to dwell on the past.

Agree about young and healthy.  Full of life ahead.  Damn it.

Sluff, why is the picture has error.  Too sexy??

[st789]

Enjoy the time with your daughter Bette.  Yes, people that have never stay in the hospital for one whole month would not understand life and death is so marginal.

Stay in the moment.

[bdpoe]

The more you know it seems the more you suffer. What you don't know could kill you.
How's that for a catch 22?

Yes I fear for my life See How Sanitary Is Your Clinic in the Dialysis Center boards.

I wake up and panic every dialysis day and sometimes the night before.

Do you realize in some states, like Florida, some have to move to a different city to get
treatment? If you are deemed a problem for whatever insignificant or unjustified reason
all the clinics can refuse to treat you.

Unless you have a very good lawyer and plenty of money your shafted.

Of course it differs state by state, network by network.

Yeah life is fragile and is being constantly devalued here in this country.

It's unimaginable what poor ESRD patients go through. Trouble getting Meds, Doctor Appointments,
and adequate dialysis care.

I'm Frightened Half to Death.
....bd /6 yrs in clinic Hemo

[Sluff]

Yep, try not to dwell on the past.

Agree about young and healthy.  Full of life ahead.  Damn it.

Sluff, why is the picture has error.  Too sexy??

Too know me is to love me.  LOL

[st789]

Ignorant is Bliss ??

Naive is Bless ??

Love me or love me not.  Ok, I am on the cloud now.  I am out the here.

[Sluff]

It's just a avatar that I thought was funny.

[tweetykiss]

Yes life is very fragile and precious so we should all try to treasure each day with our loved ones since one never know........

BDpoe,

It is so hard to fanthom that they can refuse treatment.....that is even worse than sentencing a criminal to death.......Now I am more afraid than ever since I don't want my husband doing PD and I don't really want to do home hemo either since if anything goes wrong, there is no medical treatment.........good thing he is not at that point yet.....

How are they treating you at your clinic?

[meadowlandsnj]

Do most of you feel life is fragile when you depend on the machine to sustain life?  The patient really does not know when is his last day on this earth.  Infections, cardiact arrest, seizure, and etc.,

I can also get killed crossing the street, by a stray bullet, by a speeding car, by anything that life or God throws at you.
I can't think about that, I'm too busy living right now to think about those things.   

 

Donna

[bdpoe]

Yes life is very fragile and precious so we should all try to treasure each day with our loved ones since one never know........

BDpoe,

It is so hard to fanthom that they can refuse treatment.....that is even worse than sentencing a criminal to death.......Now I am more afraid than ever since I don't want my husband doing PD and I don't really want to do home hemo either since if anything goes wrong, there is no medical treatment.........good thing he is not at that point yet.....

How are they treating you at your clinic?

I was one who was unjustly labled a problem patient and the word was passed on to every clinic and Neph I applied to
in three counties within 50 miles of my home. My only problem was that I complained about unsanitary conditions
and mistreatment by some of the staff. Even the ESRD network did very little in trying to find the truth.

So all the clinics refused me and left me to die or move which I could not do or afford.
I was stunned. I wrote urgent pleas for humanitarian assistance which were ignored.
I found a suppossed religious hospital that took me as an outpatient thus saving my life.

Things were great the first year and a half. I was an easy to care for patient with no problems.
Until they removed my catheter and started sticking me and some personell changes.

When I started innocently questioning skill levels, qualifications, procedures to people I thought were
my friends everything wernt to hell.

Now most days it seems like they want me to go away. Seems like the charge nurse considers me
a pain in the  butt and either cant do the job or is deliberately trying every way possible to make life difficult.

Once in a while I get a good nurse who takes care of me in a very professional manner.
The rest of the time it's not too good and frightening. And this is the best care available!
it's once never endiing crisis.

.......bd

[tweetykiss]

BDpoe,

They are just so full of cr*p.........now I am going to assume you didn't have family or relatives who could provide your aid with getting legal services for this....can this sort of malarkey be reported to AMA?  They say customers and patients always right but then we never are......that is just pathectic how they mistreat you and and then ban you.......

You could maybe so a malpractice suit with an attorney who only charges a percent of what you get......

I just know this has to be cr*p.....

[Adam_W]

Yes life is very fragile and precious so we should all try to treasure each day with our loved ones since one never know........

BDpoe,

It is so hard to fanthom that they can refuse treatment.....that is even worse than sentencing a criminal to death.......Now I am more afraid than ever since I don't want my husband doing PD and I don't really want to do home hemo either since if anything goes wrong, there is no medical treatment.........good thing he is not at that point yet.....

How are they treating you at your clinic?

I was one who was unjustly labled a problem patient and the word was passed on to every clinic and Neph I applied to
in three counties within 50 miles of my home. My only problem was that I complained about unsanitary conditions
and mistreatment by some of the staff. Even the ESRD network did very little in trying to find the truth.

So all the clinics refused me and left me to die or move which I could not do or afford.
I was stunned. I wrote urgent pleas for humanitarian assistance which were ignored.
I found a suppossed religious hospital that took me as an outpatient thus saving my life.

Things were great the first year and a half. I was an easy to care for patient with no problems.
Until they removed my catheter and started sticking me and some personell changes.

When I started innocently questioning skill levels, qualifications, procedures to people I thought were
my friends everything wernt to hell.

Now most days it seems like they want me to go away. Seems like the charge nurse considers me
a pain in the  butt and either cant do the job or is deliberately trying every way possible to make life difficult.

Once in a while I get a good nurse who takes care of me in a very professional manner.
The rest of the time it's not too good and frightening. And this is the best care available!
it's once never endiing crisis.

.......bd

Remind me to never go to one of those centres. I had some problems in my former centre (see my posts from about a month ago), but they would have never completely kicked me out. They did make me come off the machine and ask me to leave one time because I was really upset, but they didn't throw me out for good. I just can't believe they would throw you out to die because you were concerned about the clinic's sanitary condition. The cleanliness of a dialysis centre is one of the most important things for our safety, and they should have respected your concerns and made an effort to fix the problem, rather than literally trying to DENY YOUR RIGHT TO LIVE! I hope things get better at the hospital you're at, or you can get into a better place.  Take care.

Adam

[goofynina]

Do most of you feel life is fragile when you depend on the machine to sustain life?  The patient really does not know when is his last day on this earth.  Infections, cardiact arrest, seizure, and etc.,

I can also get killed crossing the street, by a stray bullet, by a speeding car, by anything that life or God throws at you.
I can't think about that, I'm too busy living right now to think about those things.   

Now that is how I am thinking Donna,  the more you think about it, the faster it will come, so, BE HAPPY AND LIVE UNTIL YOU DIE!!!   

[George Jung]

Life is precious not fragile.  At least thats how I have always tried to think about it.

[goofynina]

Life is precious not fragile.  At least thats how I have always tried to think about it.

oooh, nice one George, me likey

[Ang]

i'm  to  busy  living  life to  consider  it  fragile,occassionally  i  allow  my self  to  remember  the  machine  is  keeping  me  going,family  need  me  to  much  to  dwell  on  it 

[bdpoe]

Some things to consider again ,  :boxing;this varies state by state and ESRD Network to Network.
Florida is ranked among the four worst states in social spending.

Nurses and Charge nurses are supposed to be the primary advocate for the patient
but too often they are the primary advocate of their employers, co workers, mortgages and
car payments as in many lines of work.

When you are in treatment, you are alone and defenseless, The staff controls the information
and despite your alleged "rights" the game is rigged in their favor. Thus it is actually very hard to
prove malpractice or misconduct.

You can complain to management and the administration, you can file a grievance with various state regulatory
agencies and the ESRD Network but these agencies have limited resources and little enforcement power.

The truth about malpractice lawyers is that they usually only persue very high claims and settlement cases in situations where there has been significant injury or neglect that can be proven. Even then it takes a lot to inestigate and
prepare a case so the payoff has to be high enough to warrant the work.

Hospitals, chain clinics and doctors groups all generally have legal teams to defend against such suits.

Legal Aid and Pro Bono lawyers don't have the funding or time to go up against these legal teams.

In conclusion most patients are reluctant to make waves as are nurses as they don't want to be
black balled or suffer retribution. The sad thing is the general public is unaware of this, doesn't care
until they or a loved one is victimized and it's easier to blame the victim than to face the tough truth.

I recently read that 1 in 136 patients admitted to the hospital in the USA are harmed or infected.
Those aren't very good odds in my book. Now think about what the stats must be in clinics.
 

BDpoe,

They are just so full of cr*p.........now I am going to assume you didn't have family or relatives who could provide your aid with getting legal services for this....can this sort of malarkey be reported to AMA?  They say customers and patients always right but then we never are......that is just pathectic how they mistreat you and and then ban you.......

You could maybe so a malpractice suit with an attorney who only charges a percent of what you get......

I just know this has to be cr*p.....

[keefer51]

Since i was young and was told i had one kidney i tried like hell to take care of it. In the back of my mind i figured that would be how i would die. Of course no one really knows for sure. I have lived my life like today is my last. I have made many bad decisions but i have lived it my way. Sounds like a song. Since being back on dialysis the stench of death has come back. The chances are greater. My center is dirty but i go on the third shift Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I seem to get the following shifts filth. I also see a nurse and two techs who have worked fifteen hours or so. I have been a patient who questions everything. I am sure my folder has a big red "Non-Compliant" on it. I know when you aren't a good little patient they will send you to the Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday shift where the patients don't live too long. I have found the more i fight the more they ignore. One time i was going down for a test and i wanted to be sure i was put out for it. I didn't want to feel the pain from it. I was in a operating room and waiting for the shot that would put me under and they tried to do it without it. I put up such a fuss they stooped. I went back to my room and was told by the nurse they wanted to inject me with Thorazine. I put a stop to that. There is really not much we can do if we take them to court. Those cases are so expensive. When i had the chest catheter i went through seven of them each time they would load me up with Gentamicician. After about a year and a half of this i started to walk like i was drunk. Swaying side to side. I went through a few doctors and a few test only to have a ENT tell me my inner ear had been damaged from too many dosages of Gentamicican. He told me there wasn't anything i could do about it. I was told they had given me the wrong dosage. I found another patient who had the same thing at my center. It's my word against there's. There was a man at my clinic who was deemed a "Non Compliant" patient. He went to the Tuesday shift and died. I'm not afraid to die. I don't have what allot of people have. I don't make waves. I try and be the good boy they want me to be.

[LightLizard]

Life is precious AND fragile.
At a certain point, being on dialysis, -'dependant on a machine'- is not very different from being
dependant on a toilet, (imagine life without one!) or a car, (for some) and it isn't
as bad as it could be.
We humans always want more, more, more. Yet, there are so many who have done with much less.
Children dying long before their time, needlessly and pointlessly.
Yes, life is fragile AND precious. We learn how much this is so when we face our mortality.
Most of us need to experience a serious health issue before we do that because we humans are also masters of denial.
The beauty we need is in the moment. This moment.
What more is there?

love

~LL~

[bdpoe]

Dirty Clinic, Overworked tired staff, fear of retribution and medical mistakes! Seems Keefer has the situation
well represented. It sucks. So does the rest of the stuff that goes along with it. Living for the moment
and stopping to smell the roses isn't a remedy for situations such as this.

Yes spirituality helps you cope and you can pray "Father forgive them they know not what they do..."
But it seems that here in America we have our priorities skewed. Is Basketball on tonight? Ahhhh blame the victim and to hell with the homeless lets build some millionaires a new sports facility at your expense.

Sure there are always people who have it worse and I empathize. Yer to see health care decline over the years
( while technology for rich has made great advances) One must question what in the heck are we doing?
Is this the Best Health Care we can offer our disabled citizens?   

Since i was young and was told i had one kidney i tried like hell to take care of it. In the back of my mind i figured that would be how i would die. Of course no one really knows for sure. I have lived my life like today is my last. I have made many bad decisions but i have lived it my way. Sounds like a song. Since being back on dialysis the stench of death has come back. The chances are greater. My center is dirty but i go on the third shift Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I seem to get the following shifts filth. I also see a nurse and two techs who have worked fifteen hours or so. I have been a patient who questions everything. I am sure my folder has a big red "Non-Compliant" on it. I know when you aren't a good little patient they will send you to the Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday shift where the patients don't live too long. I have found the more i fight the more they ignore. One time i was going down for a test and i wanted to be sure i was put out for it. I didn't want to feel the pain from it. I was in a operating room and waiting for the shot that would put me under and they tried to do it without it. I put up such a fuss they stooped. I went back to my room and was told by the nurse they wanted to inject me with Thorazine. I put a stop to that. There is really not much we can do if we take them to court. Those cases are so expensive. When i had the chest catheter i went through seven of them each time they would load me up with Gentamicician. After about a year and a half of this i started to walk like i was drunk. Swaying side to side. I went through a few doctors and a few test only to have a ENT tell me my inner ear had been damaged from too many dosages of Gentamicican. He told me there wasn't anything i could do about it. I was told they had given me the wrong dosage. I found another patient who had the same thing at my center. It's my word against there's. There was a man at my clinic who was deemed a "Non Compliant" patient. He went to the Tuesday shift and died. I'm not afraid to die. I don't have what allot of people have. I don't make waves. I try and be the good boy they want me to be.

[George Jung]

By my definition, life is most certainly not fragile. 

I just wanted to put that out there so I would not be grouped togeather.  Sometimes I think it is good to stand out and be firm with your thoughts and feelings.  Someone might read this and need to hear it.  Although no one is wrong about their feeling I don't necessarily agree with a "cuddly everyone is right attitude."  You can say life is both precious and fragile but it's not to me.

Hope you all understand - George

[LightLizard]

fragile, precious or not, no amount of bitching and moaning and feeling sorry for yourself is going to make anything better, that's for sure.

[Danally]

Since i was young and was told i had one kidney i tried like hell to take care of it. In the back of my mind i figured that would be how i would die. Of course no one really knows for sure. I have lived my life like today is my last. I have made many bad decisions but i have lived it my way. Sounds like a song. Since being back on dialysis the stench of death has come back. The chances are greater. My center is dirty but i go on the third shift Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I seem to get the following shifts filth. I also see a nurse and two techs who have worked fifteen hours or so. I have been a patient who questions everything. I am sure my folder has a big red "Non-Compliant" on it. I know when you aren't a good little patient they will send you to the Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday shift where the patients don't live too long. I have found the more i fight the more they ignore. One time i was going down for a test and i wanted to be sure i was put out for it. I didn't want to feel the pain from it. I was in a operating room and waiting for the shot that would put me under and they tried to do it without it. I put up such a fuss they stooped. I went back to my room and was told by the nurse they wanted to inject me with Thorazine. I put a stop to that. There is really not much we can do if we take them to court. Those cases are so expensive. When i had the chest catheter i went through seven of them each time they would load me up with Gentamicician. After about a year and a half of this i started to walk like i was drunk. Swaying side to side. I went through a few doctors and a few test only to have a ENT tell me my inner ear had been damaged from too many dosages of Gentamicican. He told me there wasn't anything i could do about it. I was told they had given me the wrong dosage. I found another patient who had the same thing at my center. It's my word against there's. There was a man at my clinic who was deemed a "Non Compliant" patient. He went to the Tuesday shift and died. I'm not afraid to die. I don't have what allot of people have. I don't make waves. I try and be the good boy they want me to be.

If you are not happy with your center, why don't you look for a new one?