Get-togethers

[AnnieB]

How do people handle things like parties, family get-togethers, etc? Especially when food is such a big part of the festivities? I don't want to not be able to eat anything (like today) and it seems a lot of these sort of occasions have food that's really off the list. Clearly you are not necessarily going to announce to the world (just certain persons) that you are on a special restricted diet, so how do you deal with this?   

[MooseMom]

Let's look at this in another way.  If I were hosting a family get together and someone in my family had a restricted diet and couldn't eat anything I provided, I would frankly be embarrassed and none too pleased that said family member didn't do me the courtesy of telling me.  It is one thing to declare, "ooh, I don't eat that because I have a moral reason for not doing so" and "I can't eat that because it might kill me."

So, there are several things you can do.

1.  Have a quiet word to the hostess and honestly explain the situation.  Instead of telling her what you can't eat, tell her what you CAN eat.  Tell her you regret any inconvenience and offer to bring some things you can eat if you get the impression you are being an imposition.

2.  If you don't want to say anything about your dietary restrictions, don't expect to find too many things that are completely safe for you to consume.  Have a look at your labs and determine how much you can cheat.  Be extra careful about what you eat for several days before the event so that you have a bit more wiggle room.  If there is nothing you can safely eat, have a taste of a few of the foods and watch your portions. 

3.  One time at such an event where I didn't know the hostess very well, I found there was really nothing safe, so I but a little bit of each thing on my plate and moved it around with my fork.  No one was looking at what MooseMom was eating because there were far more interesting things going on; no one really cares what you are eating or not eating.  Eat safe foods before you go so that you won't be tempted at the party.

It's not easy, but remember that no one is watching your plate or what is going into your mouth.

[cattlekid]

I have honestly found that one day/one meal doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things. So if I'm going to a get-together, I eat reasonable portions of the good stuff and enjoy myself. I look at it like dieting for weight loss, you cant eat lettuce all the time or you will go nuts.

[jbeany]

Bringing something you can have is always helpful.  Apples or some other fruit and dip was always a good option for me.  Everyone loves it, and few people think to bring fruit to these things.  Even just a bag of grapes works if you don't want to mess with dip.  As everyone else has said, just have tiny portions of the least dangerous stuff.   I know it stinks having to be good, but it beats the alternative.  High potassium will kill you! 

If you are someplace you don't want to talk about your health and the diet restrictions that come with it, never, never say you are on a diet.  People LOVE to help others break a diet - so they don't feel guilty for eating stuff they know is bad for them.  Anything from "I'm too full." to "My stomach has been upset all day; I really don't want to risk it." is a better thing to say. 

[MommyChick]

I'm with cattlekid on this.. Normally parties & picnics are a few a year. Its not going to hurt if you splurge on one here & there. Just try to eat reasonable that week & when that get together comes still be reasonable but splurge a little.

[gothiclovemonkey]

i agree, live a little... dont over do it, especially on the long weekends and such, but once in a while is ok, just try not to go for the stuff thats reaaaaaally high...
and while i also agree u could say something, especially if they wouldnt mind like dialysing the taters or whatever....
unfortunately even if u do tell them they could be like my family gatherings.... in my family they dont seem to give a crap. and some of them are doctors and nurses. Until last year, they never did anything "special" for me to have, or at least try to have a couple of things available i was ok to eat. they had what they wanted and that was that. so id usually have a tiny bit of whatever and just eat later, , but last year my dear brother was cooking, everyone wanted ham, potatoes, etc, -pretty well everything thats a no no--  so he made me a special chicken breast (good to have a chef for a brother  )

[bleija]

thaqt was very considerate, but yeah i agree, asmall portions of the not so dangerous stuff, most events liek that i went to, i knew who was hosting and they knew i had restrictions, and if not, nobody ever said anythign to me, or sometimes just so i wasnt tempted i would just pick a few things off hubbys plate, i usually would eat before too.