Neph's nurse bullying

[Rivy]

OMG!  Our nurse that comes around twice a week just treated and talked to me as thou I was a 2nd grader which pissed me off. Iasked her why does patients that come in from out of town have 3 1/2 hour treatments and Im still having 4 hours w/o see if i can do 3 1/2. She bullied on me right away and started with the negitives sayin i could not do 3 1/2 hours. Hell I'm more healthier than most patients in this center and i work full time.  She(Lelsli) clinic nurse started bullying me.  She started yelling that she always started with the positive by saying that my potasim came down and my animia came down But than with the Phos. was to high and what am I doing about it.  like i'm not trying to get it down. That is when I said she never has any thing positive to say. To make a long story short, she never answered the question and said she apologize for coming out negitive however when she was done she rolled her eyes and aggresivel moved the cart across the room. She never answered the question.  >:(I really dislike her with the attutude.  Thanks for listening, Rivy

[sullidog]

Have you talked to your neph about this? Is she your neph's nurse?

[Rivy]

Yes the nurse is the neph's nurse..I just feel like she is bullying me just to see that she is in control..I wish she would of answered the question on why I can't do 3 1/2 hours, but others can that come in from other states.  I don't understand why I can't stop seeing her or having come by which only upsets me more..I know that one patient won't have our Neph see her due to that he said something about that patient and that patient doesn't want him coming around her.  Is that ok to do? Is that I right to say who sees us or not?  Do we have any rights?  I think I should mention this to our center manager then go on higher.  I'm sure that my Neph doctor will support her more than me.  He always thinks it's my fault that I didn't sign up for the kidney transplant earlier and that is why I don't have a transplant.   I hear this all the time.   
Thanks,
Rivy

[dyann]

Yes you have rights, but sounds like you may need a new neph.

[Meinuk]

Rivy, your nurse does not write your orders.  This is a discussion that you HAVE to have with your neph.  (They write your orders for dialysis)

Your Nurse can discuss your numbers with you, as well as your dietician, but it is your neph that prescribes your run time. Anything that they tell you about your run time would only be their opinion.  Go to your neph if you want to challenge your time.

As far as anyoine else in the facility, if they are running 3 1/1 hours, that should be what was written on their treatment orders by their nephrologist. 

I just want to tell you that the more dialysis the better.  If you are small in stature, then usually there can be shorter run times, but as far as your health is concened, with in-center dialysis, generally you need all the dialysis you can get.

[sullidog]

I can get by with shorter d because I'm one of those small guys, but I choose to run longer cause it makes me feel good.
If you aren't happy then time to switch nephs because as long as you have this neph you will have his nurse.

[Riki]

I have different experiences with the nurses.. perhaps it's because I'm Canadian..

My nurses are not specific to the Nephrologists, although, there are only 2 in the province, and they both look after everybody, because they are partners.  The nurses know more about us and how were are doing, because they see us 3 times a week, where we're lucky to see either of the doctors once a month.  The nurses tell the doctors what we need, not the other way around.  They pretty much write the orders and get the doctors to sign them. 

If the nurse is telling you that you need to watch your phosphorus, it's probably because you do.  Take this from someone who has to watch their phosphorus. *L*  They're not bullying you, more they're trying to tell you, though not very tactfully, that you need to do these things in order to stay, in a manner of speaking anyway, healthy.

After 20 years of this disease (and I'm only 33), I've learned that I'm not going to like everyone who looks after me, and everyone who looks after me is not going to like me.  It's the way of the world, unfortunately.  Also, just because they are health care workers, it doesn't mean they are actually going to care.

[Rivy]

Thank you, Meinuk.  Your right and why couldn't she tell me that instead of making an issue about not answering it. I understand reading your post now..TG for this group! 

Rivy, your nurse does not write your orders.  This is a discussion that you HAVE to have with your neph.  (They write your orders for dialysis)

Your Nurse can discuss your numbers with you, as well as your dietician, but it is your neph that prescribes your run time. Anything that they tell you about your run time would only be their opinion.  Go to your neph if you want to challenge your time.

As far as anyoine else in the facility, if they are running 3 1/1 hours, that should be what was written on their treatment orders by their nephrologist. 

I just want to tell you that the more dialysis the better.  If you are small in stature, then usually there can be shorter run times, but as far as your health is concened, with in-center dialysis, generally you need all the dialysis you can get.

[Rivy]

 :beer1;Agreed, Sullidog..I am so understanding now. Than You..It would have to be changing to another center for a new Neph nurse..I'm thinking  about it.    Rivy

I can get by with shorter d because I'm one of those small guys, but I choose to run longer cause it makes me feel good.
If you aren't happy then time to switch nephs because as long as you have this neph you will have his nurse.

[Rivy]

Riki,  Thank you!  I have a clear picture now on how health care ppl. don't really care especially in a dialysis center and I see that in mine here in Albuqeurque Kidney Center, it's worse. It just doesn't seem that my Neph and his nurse don't comunicate because everytime one doesn't know what the other had said and they tell me the same thing or don't look/read the order reports ..sometimes I have to remind them. There are sometimes where they'll read my test result from a month ago..and loose some test results..This has happened several times.  Our Dietieticin knows a lot more and is very clear to understand..I learn much more from her than the Neph and his nurse.  Thank you for your encouraging words.. :clap;Rivy

I have different experiences with the nurses.. perhaps it's because I'm Canadian..

My nurses are not specific to the Nephrologists, although, there are only 2 in the province, and they both look after everybody, because they are partners.  The nurses know more about us and how were are doing, because they see us 3 times a week, where we're lucky to see either of the doctors once a month.  The nurses tell the doctors what we need, not the other way around.  They pretty much write the orders and get the doctors to sign them. 

If the nurse is telling you that you need to watch your phosphorus, it's probably because you do.  Take this from someone who has to watch their phosphorus. *L*  They're not bullying you, more they're trying to tell you, though not very tactfully, that you need to do these things in order to stay, in a manner of speaking anyway, healthy.

After 20 years of this disease (and I'm only 33), I've learned that I'm not going to like everyone who looks after me, and everyone who looks after me is not going to like me.  It's the way of the world, unfortunately.  Also, just because they are health care workers, it doesn't mean they are actually going to care.

[Riki]

I think some people really just don't have any tact.  They don't realize that what they're saying is hurtful, or sometimes just downright dumb.  I remember a doctor, who I believe was in her first year training to be a nephrologist.  She was new, anyway, and young. I was about 20 at the time, and she *might* have been 5 years older than me, and definitely less than 10.  She was lecturing me on the basics of kidney disease, things that I'd known since I was 12 years old.  I remember being extremely angry with her, because I had been doing this longer than she had.  I kept my mouth shut (somehow) but I remember thinking that I had been doing this stuff when she was still following the cute boys around her high school.

[pitagory]

I know what you mean about the nurses. to them its just a job. at the end of the day they go home and eat anything they want drink any thing they want and don't have to worry about anything that has to do with dialysis. I do peritoneal Dialysis so I only see my nurse 2 times a month and my doctor once. and I thank god for that because let me tell you I would have choked my nurse if I had to see him 3 times a week. he talks to me like I am a little kid that did something wrong yet he smell like a chuchu train. he probably smoke's like 1 pack a day and in his office he has coke cans lying all over the place.every time something is wrong with me I just dread calling him. one of these days I am going to blow my top I just know it. And the thing is, it takes a lot for me not to like somewon because I know we are not all the same.The world would be a very boring  if we where all the same. so I have a pretty opened mind, it's just this one person ughhh.

[Meinuk]

I have to say, I write a lot about the way things are "supposed" to be, but I have to add that many times, dialysis facility staff don't follow the rules.  Because a neph does not see you every session (oh, that I wish they did) they rely on the opinons and suggestions of the nurses and techs, and in some cases, the nephs develop a lazy "trust" and simply sign off on a change order.

There are almost 400,000 people on dialysis in the United States, and ONLY 8,000 nephrologists (yes, that is not a typo, 8,000).  Dialysis is in a crisis right now.  For a short term goal, we ALL need to make sure that our care is the best possible care that we can get, and make sure that our medical team is on the same page.  This means taking things to your nephrologist, and making them do their job, no matter how owerworked they may seem, this is their job.

For the long term, the industry has to change, and we need more medical students choosing nephrology as a practice area.  Or we need to think about developing a Nephrology program for Physician Assistants and/or Nurse Practitioners.  The fact is that our providers need better support and better training.  As their patients, we can help that by being in charge of our care, and knowing as much as we can about our care and our bodies.

To me, this is the only way to get out of this alive.

[sullidog]

Yeah everytime at my former center when I reported to the neph about the staff doing wrong the staff would defend themselves and get nasty like if you have a problem with us you come to us and not your doctor, I say whatever!