Well, all my life I lived thinking one day it would all be over. Now that I am on dialysis, I hope I last long enough to know Ive done the best I could do for me & all the people I know. Most of all, I will live long enough to know my daughter wont have to depend on anyone for anything, especially love. I trust God put her in my life for a reason, as she is now my reason for living thru this.
So far in the history of the world approximately six billion people have died. In every single case observed so far, the person dying has never been me. Therefore, there is excellent statistical confirmation for the hypothesis that I am immortal.
I made the innocent remark yesterday evening to one of the nurses in my unit asking how long I had left to dialyze. Do you know what he replied? He meant it as a joke and said "about 15 years!".Now, I know this was a joke and he would`ve been offended if I took it the wrong way. But the problem is, it got me thinking about how long I really do have left with or without a transplant, I`m not even on the list at the moment. How long can you last on dialysis for??? I know everyone is different but what`s the longest time anyone has been on dialysis??? I don`t want to be morbid but I also know that most people in the end, pass away from some other illness related to kidney failure, not the kidney failure itself. I`m only 34 and the thought of possibly living until I`m only 50 has me slightly anxious and worried! I think it was a stupid comment to make anyway cos I got enough on my plate without having to worry about long I may or may not live for!!!
They drug some poor old lady in the center today in a flat wheel chair. They had to use the lift to put her in the chair and prop her up. She yelled when they stuck her, so I know she was alive. She sat there for 3 hours trying to lick her lips. No one to get her water or an ice chip. Why in God's name are they keeping her on dialysis. It made me sick. I put this post here to prove a point. Life expectancy is a case by case basis. That is like trying to ask how long blonds live.
Does it really matter how long we live? If you wakeup tomorrow it's a good day! If not so be it. I don't worry about dying. I just enjoy everyday now. Never Weaken!!
These mortality rates are so skewed that it isn't even funny. There are too many other factors involved such as other health problems. A dialysis patient like me is probably going to live longer than one with diabetes and heart problems that doesn't drink moonshine or take steroids.