Article published Dec 27, 2007
The gift of giving: Sibling spares kidney for brotherBy Chris Jackett
STAFF WRITER
Fifteen years separate half-brothers Michael and Phil Stachowski, but, next month, they will share the operating room for a life-saving kidney transplant.
Michael Stachowski, a 40-year-old Novi resident, has polycystic kidney disease, a genetic disorder where multiple cysts grow in both kidneys. The cysts make it hard for his kidneys to function.
On Nov. 8, he had one of his two kidneys removed.
"The cysts are so large they had to take out one kidney," said father Leonard Stachowski. "The doctor said it was the size of a watermelon and weighed 14 pounds. The other kidney is just as large."
With one kidney left and recuperating from the removal of the first, Michael Stachowski requires an exhausting three-and-a-half-hour blood dialysis three times a week.
"It's just basically fatigue and wearing you down," he said of the past few months. "I found out I had it when I was 30. I started feeling the effects about a year ago."
History of illness
Polycystic kidney disease has a history in the family, as Michael Stachowski's older brother, Leonard Stachowski, Jr., now a 42-year-old St. Joseph resident, was diagnosed with the disease when they were younger.
"My oldest son was playing football in Taylor," said their father. "He was playing defensive end and got hit with a helmet in the kidney. We went home and he was peeing blood. He was 14 and Michael was 12."
The inherited trait came from their mother, who died from the disease in 1987 at age 43. Leonard Stachowski's three youngest sons, all from his second wife, are not carriers. His son Daniel is 27 and Jonathan is 24.
Phil Stachowski, a 2000 alumnus of Novi High School who now lives in Wixom with his brother Dan, said it was an easy decision for him to donate one of his kidneys to his brother.
"(I decided to do it) to save his life, pretty much. I was the best donator. We let the doctor pick. Dan would donate to anyone, but Jon was the next best match," he said. "We knew his kidneys were failing. He was an upbeat kind of guy. Now he just sits around. We talk a lot more. We talked before, but he only lives a couple miles away."
Family bonds
Phil Stachowski said his brother Michael Stachowski, a 1985 alumnus of Novi High School, had always been there for him growing up.
"He was there until he got married 12 years ago this December. He taught me everything I know - hockey, golf, baseball," he said. "He was my baseball coach since I was 5. I was on the high school hockey team. He did not miss a single game, and we had some in Lansing, Hartland, Howell.
"He was actually a really good brother now that I think of it."
With their father and oldest brother Leonard Stachowski Jr. both living hours away and their brother Jonathan fathering a baby born two weeks ago, the family plans to work through the hard times together as best they can.
"I can't lift more than 10 pounds for six weeks," Phil Stachowski said of the time following the Jan. 23, 2008 transplant. "I had to quit my real job because I had to keep going to the hospital. I had to go in four times in three weeks. I was building houses. Now I work at Arby's for $7 an hour. I live with my older brother, Dan, so he's going to put in overtime to help me out with rent."
The final outcome
Michael Stachowski, who still referees hockey as he recovers, can't wait until everything's done and he can get back to playing hockey and softball.
This fall was the first time in six years he wasn't able to put together an "all-star" team of guys from the Novi recreational league to travel to the Independent Softball Association's Fall World Series in Las Vegas.
"We're looking forward to getting back to things and having a normal life again," said Michael's wife, Karen Stachowski. "It makes you realize what's more important in life, material things or family.
Michael Stachowski said his family - dad, brothers, wife and daughters Taylor, 9, and Kelsey, 8 - have been as helpful and supportive as possible during this rough patch of a few months.
"They've just been there for me. They do things, lift things and bring things to me from around the house," he said.
Novi News staff writer Chris Jackett can be reached at (248) 349-1700, ext. 122 or cjackett@gannett.com.
http://hometownlife.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071227/NEWS13/712270389/10301. Photo by JOHN HEIDER/Novi News
Novi resident Mike Stachowski, left, will be receiving a kidney from his half-brother Phil Stachkowski early in the new year. Mike had his ailing right kidney removed less than two months ago and needs to undergo dialysis because his remaining kidney is not functioning properly. Photo by JOHN HEIDER/Novi News Novi resident Michael Stachowski, left, will be receiving a kidney from his half-brother Phil Stachkowski early in the new year. Michael had one ailing kidney removed less than two months ago and needs to undergo dialysis because his remaining kidney is not functioning properly.
2. Photo by JOHN HEIDER/Novi News
Mike Stachowski shows the ten-inch long scar on his right abdomen where his ailing kidney was removed less than two months ago. Mike will receive a kidney donation from his brother Phil Stachowski early in 2008. Mike Stachowski shows the 10-inch long scar on his right abdomen where his ailing kidney was removed less than two months ago. Photo by JOHN HEIDER/Novi News