Start Or Not To Start Dialysis

[Goofy]

Sorry for the l-o-n-g  post but I'm sure you've all figured out by now that I can't just say a few words!

I know some people may say its about time but I've FINALLY made the decision to start dialysis.

I just can't take it any more; the exhaustion, dizziness, muscle twitching, my slow brain function and feeling sick and blaming it on other things has finally made me "give in".........not to mention all the "encouragement" I've had!!

My PD cath is under my skin so I going to have it exteroised November 17.  I originally scheduled it for  November 24 but I just can't take it anymore. Each day I feel weaker and weaker.

Now I just hope dialysis lives up to my "expectations".  I hope it gives me energy, takes the muscle twitches away and just make me feel like a human being again.

I haven't been feelilng well and I just want to get it over with.  My original dialysis start date was December1 but since I'm not feeling well, I'm going to start sooner.

I never, ever thought I would actually start.  I had my monthly blood tests two weeks ago and yesterday I had to get them taken for the surgery. And can you believe my kidney function has declined since my last blood tests two weeks ago??  All the blood tests they do are all out of whack and the funny part is I can really feel it.

I am still glad that I held out until I felt "I" was ready.  If I started before I was ready, I would second guess myself for the rest of my life.  I would keep thinking how long could I have gone without dialysis......

I've told my manager and he's very supportive.  I keep "reassuring" him that it won't interfere with my job but I'm not quite sure I really believe that.  Take for instance, I've been feeling bad this whole week but I'm afraid to stay home.  I don't want him to think I  haven't even started dialysis and you taking time off.  I'm sure he really wouldn't care, but in my mind I would always be nervous if I took to much time off.  As everyone knows jobs are hard to come by.  Although I had to leave work early on Monday because I was having severe anxiety attacks.......go figure!

So thanks to everyone who has supported me on my journey.  I'm sure I'll have plenty of questions once I start.

[silverhead]

No, thank You for making THE decision, I'm sure you will start feeling better real soon.......
Tom

[willowtreewren]

Goofy,
You will feel so much better. My husband felt 10 years younger once he started. Wishing you the very best!

Aleta

[Pam]

  I'm so glad you have finally decided to start! Just removing the stress from making that decision is going to help. I do Hemo and could feel the difference after one week of treatments.

Pam

[Des]

Yeah for Goofy!!!!!!

I am proud of you as I know how difficult this was for you to decide.... You will feel better but remember it is not immediately.. it is a gradual process....

Good luck!!! and I hope everything works out fabulous!!!

hugs

[billybags]

Goofy, you will be fine. it has took along time for you to "arrive here" I am not saying it will all be plain sailing but its got to make you feel better than you do.

[Jean]

Heres hoping for smooth sailing in your adventure with Dialysis.

[Bajanne]

At least you can be happy that it was YOUR decision.  I am happy that you came to this place.   I hope that everything works out for you as well as it has worked out for me.
Please know that you will not be going through this alone.    But you will need to keep us posted and chronicle this new journey of yours.
Lots of love

[KICKSTART]

I wont lie to you , you may not like it but you WONT regret it !  You are going to have up's and down's but more up's than down's. You will be suprised at how quickly you improve and then start to realize just how bad it had got ! Honestly pd is ok , trust me , i didnt even mind doing it !   

[lizabee]

I'm sure will start feeling better soon, good luck!

[Hanify]

Wow Goofy - that's amazing.  Well done you!  Hopefully you'll be feeling so much better really soon.  And believe me you will get used to doing PD - it's a doddle!

[st789]

Thanks for sharing.

[bette1]

I hope you feel better soon. 

[galvo]

Good on ya!

[RichardMEL]

wow ! what a surprise. Best birthday present I've had in years!!!!

Have to admit when i saw the subejct I thought to myself "uh oh not again" !!! The joke's on me! WELL DONE!!! 

That would have been such a difficult decision to make - but YOU have finally made it and have recognised that all those horrible symptoms you have been feeling ARE due to kidney failure and there's only one real course of action you can take. I'm also glad you didn't wait till you were in the ER and had no choice.

I just want to remind you that once you start try not to expect results instantly - it doesn't work like that unfortunately. Certainly it will take time to get all the bonus extra toxins out of your system AND to stabalise you on dialysis and get your body used to it.... so please don't get discouraged if it takes you a few weeks or a month to start to feel more normal. it may be earlier but don't despair if it takes a little time for you to feel more normal and stable. I certainly hope it is sooner though -just remember to keep your expectations real.

Again I'm so glad you have made this decision. This is a positive thing for you.

[okarol]

 
Goofy, the improvement may not be instantaneous, you may have ups and downs, but your body and mind will thank you as things get better!

[Mimi]

Oh Goofy I am so relieved.  I was afraid you would wait until you were seriously ill.  Although it won't be a joy ride and it will be a change in your
lifestyle, I believe you will eventually thank yourself for going ahead.  I
wish the very best for you and will say a prayer that everything goes smoothly. 

[Poppylicious]

Oh Goofy, that's great news.  Good luck!

 

[MissyKew]

You are going to love how much better you are going to feel.    Congrats on making the decision.

[Savemeimdtba]

I am so proud of you Goofy!  You have no idea how hard its been for us to watch you struggle with this, but I am so happy that you made the right decision We will be here every step of the way and I gaurentee that you WILL feel better, maybe not immediately, but it will happen and you'll realize how bad you've truly felt this whole time.  Good luck with your surgery!