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Author Topic: I'm Stressing Big Time!  (Read 3022 times)
peleroja
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I have 16 hats, all the same style!

« on: August 02, 2008, 07:36:34 AM »

Three months ago one of my kidney buddies passed away.  No, it wasn't the kidneys or even the cancer that killed her.  She had gone to the hospital for something minor and got a staph infection.  Too little strength to fight it and boom she was gone.

Two days ago another one of my kidney buddies passed away.  She had also gone to the hospital to figure out a fever she had had for two months, became septic, went into cardiac arrest and she was gone.

Another one of my kidney buddies just got out of the hospital after a 15 day stay for what should have been a 5 day stay, and less than two weeks later she's back in the hospital for the same thing. 

I'm not sleeping worth diddly damn, and I feel tired and listless.  I could sure use some hugs, love, warm fuzzies, white light, whatever to help me through this trying time.

Thanks for listening!
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Lori1851
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This is me Lori , Dustin's mom

« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2008, 08:22:06 AM »

Here is a big  :cuddle; from me to you!!!!
 I am so sorry for your recent loss. I lost my son July 13th just a few weeks back he was 22. All I can say is be their for your friends families call them go see them and cry together. Remember the cherished moments I do that daily.

God Bless You,
Lori/Indiana
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kitkatz
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« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2008, 08:42:35 AM »

 :grouphug; :grouphug;

Things will get better for you. Take care of yourself. Do something fun.
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
rose1999
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« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2008, 09:19:59 AM »

Here are some hugs and other nice things for you  :cuddle;   :grouphug;  :bunny:  :flower;   :cuddle;   :grouphug;  :guitar:  :wine;  :cuddle;    :grouphug;
hope you feel a little  bit better now xx
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Sluff
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« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2008, 09:39:19 AM »

 :grouphug; :grouphug; May you feel the comfort  :cuddle; :cuddle;  you require today. Sorry for all your losses.  :grouphug; :grouphug;
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G-Ma
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« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2008, 10:24:43 AM »

Oh Lord, I am so sorry for you.  Lots of hugs, prayers, I'm asking God to surround you with white light and loving angels to hold you up.
Ann/NC.
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
GOD IS GOOD
twirl
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« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2008, 10:33:12 AM »

 :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flower; :flow
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jbeany
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Cattitude

« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2008, 11:19:59 AM »

 :grouphug;

You are not alone - we're here!
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"Asbestos Gelos"  (As-bes-tos yay-lohs) Greek. Literally, "fireproof laughter".  A term used by Homer for invincible laughter in the face of death and mortality.

boxman55
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« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2008, 11:40:57 AM »

Hang in there wishing you a happy day soon things will get better...Boxman
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"Be the change you wished to be"
Started Hemodialysis 8/14/06
Lost lower right leg 5/16/08 due to Diabetes
Sister was denied donation to me for medical reasons 1/2008
Ohio Buckeye
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« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2008, 03:30:48 PM »

I'm sorry to hear of your losses.
Here is a  :grouphug; for you.
Wishing you brighter days soon.
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If I must do this to live, I must strive to live
while I am doing this.
kellyt
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« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2008, 03:36:08 PM »

:grouphug;  :grouphug;  :grouphug;  :grouphug;

I get so terrified when I hear of kidney patients (pre or post transplant) that die of something minor.  I keep telling myself that I need to put a will or something together to express my wishes just in case.

I am so terribly sorry.  Losing friends or family is horrible.  Losing multiple friends or family can be devastating.  We're here for you!   :cuddle;
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1993 diagnosed with glomerulonephritis.
Oct 41, 2007 - Got fistula placed.
Feb 13, 2008 - Activated on "the list".
Nov 5, 2008 - Received living donor transplant from my sister-in-law, Etta.
Nov 5, 2011 - THREE YEARS POST TRANSPLANT!  :D
circleNthedrain
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« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2008, 03:48:30 PM »

Hey peleroja, so sorry to hear of your friends passing.  I know how devastating this can be.  Try to keep your spirits up...call or visit friends, go out walking or to a park, go out for coffee (I just had my first iced mohca cappacino today!!).  Remember, it's the little things that help us through the big things.  Hope things get a little easier real soon.
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1979 Diagnosed with kidney failure
1979 Right arm fistula
1979 Start hemodialysis
1980 CAPD catheter
1980 Start CAPD
1989 Cadaveric kidney transplant
1995 2nd cadaveric  kidney transplant
2007 Start hemodialysis
2010 Still drawin' wind
Bajanne
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Goofynina and Epoman - Gone But Not Forgotten

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« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2008, 05:08:02 PM »

Hope this finds you feeling better.  After Twirl's field of flowers, you had better! 
I understand how you feel.  We lost our beloved Goofynina because of infection, so it is not something that I view in a light way.  But I hope you feel the love coming from all over the world to you.  Hope this helps you as you deal with these challenges.
Loads of love and caring thoughts,
Aurora
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"To be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own ...but that which is based on faith"



I LOVE  my IHD family! :grouphug;
petey
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« Reply #13 on: August 02, 2008, 05:08:44 PM »

oh, peleroja -- I'm so sorry.  The loss of a loved one or friend or good buddy is difficult for those of us still here.  Hang in there!  I'm thinking about you and wishing you peace and lots of love!   :flower;
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Nan
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« Reply #14 on: August 02, 2008, 06:11:29 PM »

Dear peleroja, Christmas of 2007, four days before Christmas my dialysis buddy, Bob died, two days before his 51 birthday.........it destroyed me.  Then on Christmas day, another dear friend at my clinic died.......I was sick to my stomach.   Then about four days later, an elderly man, who I knew mostly by nods and smiles, was told that they would have to to have his foot removed because of an infection he got from cutting his toenails,  he told them "no more."  I asked where he was, and one of the techs told me, he would not be coming to dialysis anymore.....I was silenced....I then saw his obituary on the wall where we weighed in.  It is so hard....I got so depressed, I talked to my loved ones and said "what shall I do?"  I kept wondering.........when will it be my turn?
A couple of days later, a nurse came around the room with a rubber torso.......I laughed and said.....ok ...what's THIS all about?  She asked if I knew much about PD?.........I said.........NO WAY........I can't deal with BLOOD!........she said there is NO blood to deal with this PD............well..........with the help of our IHD family, I talked with Susie and Ginger, they both helped me decide, that I could DO this!
And with "their" help..........I did!  I named my machine Pierre, he and I slept together every night....HE was my new dialysis buddy.  I have since had a kidney transplant, and yes.....sometimes I DO miss my sweet Pierre, but alas.........I am still in touch with my clinic hemo buddies....now we meet for lunch and fun........not HEMO..........!    It's a good thing!  Hang in there buddy....sometimes you have to look around the corner, and find peace of mind.
« Last Edit: August 02, 2008, 06:30:27 PM by Nan » Logged

No matter how your heart is grieving....as long as you keep believing, the dream that you wish will come true!
Diagnosed with PKD in 1994
Started HEMO dialysis June 2006
Started Home Dialysis on cycler February 2007
Had Live donor transplant February 2008
Mimi
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For any who do not like me I use - prayer.

« Reply #15 on: August 03, 2008, 02:17:53 PM »

Peleroja,  last week when I heard Randy Pausch had died, I felt sad all day long.  And, of course, I didn't know him
except for the TV specials and his Last Lecture.  However I have found when sad things come into my life I find
comfort in counting my blessings and the good things God has provided for me.  Death of our family and cherished
friends is the hardest thing we humans have to face and it does come to all of us.  It is good to realize 'This too shall
pass' and the world will keep spinning no matter what happens.  Always remember 'You are not Alone.

Love, Mimi'.
« Last Edit: August 03, 2008, 02:21:14 PM by Mimi » Logged

Death is not extinguishing the light;
it is putting out the lamp because the dawn has come.
stauffenberg
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« Reply #16 on: August 03, 2008, 03:27:21 PM »

Jeff was a fellow in his 30s who occupied the dialysis station next to me for about a year.  One night he came in looking unwell, and the nephrologist took one look at him and said he should go to the hospital right after dialysis, just on the basis of his appearance.  Jeff insisted he was all right, and since he had a job as a trucking company dispatch operator on the night shift right after dialysis, he did not want to go to the hospital and have to miss work.  Jeff had a nurse bring him a cup of tea just before the end of his dialysis session, and when the doctor told him he was going to call the ambulance to take him to the hospital, he reluctantly agreed.  When the personnel arrived to take him to the ambulance, Jeff insisted on bringing his tea with him, but they said it was against policy, so Jeff put his tea down on the armrest and went with them.  The dialysis tech then picked it up and said to no one in particular, "What do I do with this?"  At my next session I learned that Jeff had died that night at the hospital from cancer secondary to dialysis.

Ever since then patients at my dialysis center had a superstitious fear of asking for tea!  If any brave soul asked for some, the other patients would say, "How do you know you aren't getting Jeff's cup?"
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monrein
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Might as well smile

« Reply #17 on: August 03, 2008, 03:45:59 PM »

It's unbelievably sad when we lose these people who we've come to care about and with whom we share so much.  I hope you start feeling more like your old self again soon despite these losses.  I'm also sending you lots of hugs, flowers, sunshine and whatever else might possibly help right now. :guitar: :cowboy: :flower; :bestwishes;   :cuddle; :cuddle; :grouphug; :cuddle; :cuddle;  :bestwishes; :flower; :cowboy: :guitar:
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Pyelonephritis (began at 8 mos old)
Home haemo 1980-1985 (self-cannulated with 15 gauge sharps)
Cadaveric transplant 1985
New upper-arm fistula April 2008
Uldall-Cook catheter inserted May 2008
Haemo-dialysis, self care unit June 2008
(2 1/2 hours X 5 weekly)
Self-cannulated, 15 gauge blunts, buttonholes.
Living donor transplant (sister-in law Kathy) Feb. 2009
First failed kidney transplant removed Apr.  2009
Second trx doing great so far...all lab values in normal ranges
Lucinda
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Life is great!

« Reply #18 on: August 04, 2008, 06:50:38 PM »

Hi Perleroja

I am sorry you are feeling down but don't do as I did.  Stay right here.  Your friends here understand better than anyone.  When my father died of renal failure last year I became very despondent and stopped tuning in at IHD.  I lost myself in my work and sat at my computer at work for about 18 hours a day and put on about 30 kilos.  I have lost numerous family members from the same hereditary renal disease that I have and it is so hard to watch people you love pass on.  I hope you a feeling a little better since you first posted this.  Much love xxx
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devon
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« Reply #19 on: August 06, 2008, 11:47:39 AM »

I hate losing friends.  I've lost one too many too.  I grieve for them and I miss them terribly.  But, I also enjoy the fact that I have my memories of them and I shared some moments of their lives with mine.  And that's comforting.

In other words, if I hadn't known them, I wouldn't miss them.  I'm glad I knew them.

-Devon
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ODAT
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Nala - Mom's Cat

« Reply #20 on: August 06, 2008, 12:08:18 PM »

My father would never go to the hospital. Always afraid he'd get sicker. He also got a staph infection. Went sepsis one night I wasn't there. My family said they were scared beyond belief to see him shake like that. It's not right. You'd think we could fight back and the hospitals would get their sh*t together. I am so sorry for your losses. It is harder when it seems they could have been avoided, but we all need hospitals.  :cuddle;
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As is your sort of mind, so is your sort of search: you will find what you desire.
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