One family's loss gives them strength to prevent another

One family's loss gives them strength to prevent another
Posted: Tuesday, Nov 10th, 2009
BY: Jill Fier
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Wendi Haug of rural Colman and Amanda Heldt of Aurora will be in Minnesota hospitals on Tuesday, both on the operating table at practically the same time.

Haug is donating one of her kidneys to 9-year-old Amanda, who learned just last spring that she's suffering from kidney failure.

While the fact that Haug is willing to donate her kidney is heartwarming in itself, how the pair knows one another makes their story truly amazing.

Haug's own daughter died more than two years ago, and now the young mother is becoming a living donor to save the life of her daughter's friend.

Tami Heldt said her daughter, Amanda, and Taylor Haug met when both attended the special education preschool program at Central Elementary School. The pair became good friends, spending time together both in and out of school. They attended preschool together until kindergarten, when they headed off to separate schools.

Haug said that in June 2007, between her kindergarten and first-grade year, Taylor died in a drowning incident. Haug said her and husband Kyle's daughter had autism, epilepsy and other health issues, and they don't really know what happened that day.

The Heldts and the Haugs didn't see much of each other for the next two years.

It was just this past spring when Amanda, who has Joubert syndrome, was getting ready to participate in Special Olympics. She needed a physical to do so.

But Heldt said some concerning symptoms turned up at her April 12 appointment. Amanda had high blood pressure, and in the past she had complained of the skin on her arms and legs itching.

A few days and more tests later, the Heldts learned some troubling news. Amanda's left kidney had shut down completely, and her right was operating at only 15-20 percent.

(Joubert syndrome is a rare brain malformation characterized by the absence or underdevelopment of the area of the brain that controls balance and coordination . Both kidney and liver abnormalities are often associated with the disorder.)

The family started looking for a donor right away, but help from Amanda's immediate family wasn't an option. Tami was the wrong blood type, dad Bill's kidney wouldn't work, and sister Maisie, now 11, was too young. They turned to friends and acquaintances for help.

Tami Heldt said at least 11 people who offered to be tested for organ donation had a matching blood type, and Wendi Haug was among that group. 'Just automatic'

"I thought that if I could prevent Tami from going through what I had to, losing Taylor, I would definitely like to see if I would be a match," Haug said. "It was just automatic . If I was able to do it, I was going to."

As an organ donor Wendi Haug will be following in her late daughter's footsteps she, too, gave others the gift of life. The Haugs donated Taylor's corneas and her heart valve when she died, and they've even been able to meet one of the recipients.

Wendi Haug added that she understood, at least to a certain extent, what Tami Heldt was going through, because of all the health issues she had to face with Taylor.

There was one problem with the Wendi's donation, however. She would have to take iron supplements and wouldn't be able to donate right away.

The Heldts tried to find another donor who would be able to give a kidney sooner, but that fell through, and Haug became the top choice for a transplant.

So now both families are in Rochester, Minn., preparing for surgery at two Mayo Clinic hospitals.

Heldt said that after her daughter was diagnosed with kidney failure, some of her symptoms started to make sense. Amanda is thin and smaller for her age, and she sleeps up to 12 hours per day. She hasn't needed dialysis yet, and Heldt credits her daughter's healthy appetite for making it this far without treatment . Back to normal

Haug's surgery will be easier than Amanda's . She'll be up and out of the hospital in a few days and back home in a week. Her remaining kidney will grow larger to compensate for the missing one, and she can't play contact sports, but otherwise her life will return to normal.

Amanda will take longer to recover and will have to stay closer to the hospital for frequent testing, but Heldt said her daughter will start feeling better than she has in a long time as soon as the day after surgery. Tami Heldt said she couldn't believe the news when Haug told her she was willing to donate a kidney.

"I think I just burst into tears," she said with emotion. "It's such a huge gift, and she's happy to do it. 'Thank you' will never be enough."

While she and Haug lost touch when they were no longer dropping kids off at one another's homes for play dates, the women have grown closer now.

Heldt said her daughter will also need a liver transplant at some point in the future, but the family is focusing on one thing at a time.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it," she said.

Contact Jill Fier at jfier@brookingsregister .com.

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