I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: News Articles => Topic started by: okarol on July 01, 2008, 04:25:38 PM
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When Dogs Replace Dialysis Machines [pics]
July 1, 2008
Written by Thomas Davie
Environmental Graffiti Ltd
Among the most interesting of the Royal College of Art’s ‘Summer Show’ projects was Revital Cohen’s surprising new take on the ‘man-machine’ aesthetic that is every sci-fi enthusiast’s wet dream: man and animal. But why on earth would you want to use dogs for medical devices?
Revital’s designs serve two purposes: they disconnect people from the impersonal technology associated with medical procedures, but they also find a use for animals that goes beyond the norm and in some cases may help to save thousands of innocent lives - both human and animal.
The idea of transforming animals into medical devices at first glance seems like a macabre extension of sending canaries down mines but Revital’s proposals seem to strive for a beautiful symbiosis between humans and animals, a mutual dependence in which man and beast exist in perfect harmony (albeit brought together through illness). So are her ideas just pipe dreams or could they actually work in the real world?
The first part of the project revolves around the concept of the ‘Respiratory Dog’. The vast majority of greyhounds bred for racing are killed after their short career at the track ends (an estimated 7,500 to 20,000 were euthanised in 2003 alone). Revital advocates training the animal to become a respiratory assistance dog instead of simply killing it: the greyhound’s lung movements are converted into mechanical ventilation as it runs on a treadmill, the treadmill itself functioning as both interface and on/off switch. Rapid chest movements pump a bellows that pushes air into the patient’s lungs, establishing a mutually reliant relationship between man and animal - both keeping each other alive.
The second scenario envisions substituting a dialysis machine with a sheep. Revital’s scenario imagines that through a complex medical process toxins might be removed from the patient’s body through a sheep connected via blood lines to the subject and placed at the bedside at night. During the day the dialysis sheep is allowed to roam in the donor patient’s garden, grazing to cleanse its kidneys and drinking water containing salt minerals, calcium and glucose. During the night waste products from the patient’s blood are pumped out of the body, filtered through the sheep’s kidney and the blood is returned, cleaned, to the patient.
The images are startling and also, in their own way, touching. The mutual relationship not only saves lives but seems to encourage us to concentrate on making good use of the resources that grace the planet rather than subjecting ourselves to cold, inhuman machines. A nice set of ideas and a stirring piece of art, but as far as the practicalities of relying on a dog rather than a machine for respiratory aid in real life go - you must be barking.
http://www.environmentalgraffiti.com/sciencetech/when-dogs-replace-dialysis-machines-pics/1366
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Well of course I have a few questions.
1. What happens if my sheep needs a bathroom break?
2. Does the hay pose a health risk like asthma or allergic reactions?
3. Might the sheep begin exhibiting signs of moodiness and crankiness from being hooked up to my blood lines. Might she refuse to cut my lawn during the daytime for example?
4. Could I contract any of the common ovine diseases (pinkeye, baby lamb scours, uterine prolapse, feedlot rectal prolapse (my ultimate nightmare) footrot, scrapie, or the dreaded white muscle disease)?
5. Is my sheep specially bred for this special purpose or could I simply buy or steal one from a local farmer?
6. Will I begin to smell wooly myself and develop a taste for low growing greens right off the ground?
7. Are there advantages to a same-sex human/sheep pairing or, asking the same question another way, are there disadvantages to mixing it up with regard to gender?
8. Could I decide to cut back on my heating costs by snuggling with my sheep instead of having separate cots?
9. Can I travel with my sheep and dialyze in any hotel room (provided they allow sheep to sleep over and not just be present metaphorically for counting purposes)?
10. Is my sheep likely to start longing for ovine companionship or will I be enough.
If you can answer all of these questions to my full satisfaction, I will be happy to place my order for one medium sheep.
Please feel free to post further questions of your own about this artistic new way of replacing kidney function.
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I bet the waste clearance quality would be bah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ad (ok, you knew something like that was coming).
Adam
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I guess if he get's too out of control, you'll have a real Wooly Bully. :guitar:
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More questions...
Do the animals get fistulas too?
What happens if the dog bites or the sheep bolts when they see the needles coming?
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I have enough problems without my neighbors starting to ask questions about why my sheep never sleeps outside at night.
"No, no no. I don't SLEEP with the sheep. Geez. That'd be SICK. What I do is I transfuse my blood into the sheep...then I...hey, where are you going?"
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Is it just a coincidence that the woman in the first two pictures looks just like a greyhound herself? Is that a side-effect of this therapy?
The very first blood transfusions were performed by Denis in Paris in the 17th century between humans and sheep, but while some patients fared all right, some of them died, and since then we know that animal and human blood cannot safely be mixed in the same circulatory system, so I wonder how that sheep-dialysis machine is supposed to work?
While living in Germany, I had 'fresh cell therapy' (developed by Professor Paul Niehans in 1927), in which the function of various organs in the patient is improved by being injected with cells harvested from the corresponding organs of live animals, usually mountain sheep, goats, or dogs. Ever since my first intramuscular injection of sheep cells, I haven't been able to find any women attractive unless they have curly hair.
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Stauffenberg you don't often say something comical but when you do....well,you really crack me up :rofl;
And you are so right about that woman!!
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Another interesting use of animals in human medicine is the grafting of thin slices of monkey testicles into human testicles in an effort to produce a rejuvenating effect. Professor Niehans performed this operation on Pope Pius XII, but the effect is not recorded. It did lead to public criticism about the Pope having monkey testicles, and the theological question of whether the Pope's infallibility was attenuated by his being part monkey has never been addressed.
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Which begs the question...why would a POPE need to rejuvinate his nuggets????
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I have a retired Greyhound and it would be amazing to say the least if I could get him to even STAND for longer than a few minutes, much less run on a treadmill! This dog is horizontal roughly 23 hours a day and asleep for maybe 20 of those hours! When they retire they truly retire! They don't need another job! Believe me, they deserve to enjoy the rest of their life on a couch. :)
Plus, he would have to be able to see out the window because he is the neighborhood snoop - Mrs. Cravits! :rofl;
But I know he'd help if he could. He's my doggie love. :cuddle;
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I have a retired Greyhound and it would be amazing to say the least if I could get him to even STAND for longer than a few minutes, much less run on a treadmill! This dog is horizontal roughly 23 hours a day and asleep for maybe 20 of those hours! When they retire they truly retire! They don't need another job! Believe me, they deserve to enjoy the rest of their life on a couch. :)
Plus, he would have to be able to see out the window because he is the neighborhood snoop - Mrs. Cravits! :rofl;
But I know he'd help if he could. He's my doggie love. :cuddle;
You know - I have only had a dog in my life twice, once a pomerainian as a child (Tex-Ritter) , and a chow/shepard named Token- neither one really belonged to me....but I have always thought if I got a dog it would be a retired greyhound.
:)They have the nicest faces.
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Glitter, they are forever grateful. Once they acclimate to a loving home they are the best. All they require is something soft to sleep on, somewhere to relieve themselves, and mucho love. So many people think they have to have a huge yard when in reality they don't. While some do love to play and run, mine does not. He loves to sleep and eat. :)
Foster one. You won't regret it! :)
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About the article: EEEWWWW!