I Hate Dialysis Message Board
Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: News Articles => Topic started by: Charlie B53 on August 21, 2018, 05:40:08 PM
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Sadly my Wife Patsy isn't doing very well at all so I have started searching, hoping to find more affordable options for when the inevitable does occur.
I remember reading a thread within the last year about a medical company that will come and pick up a donated body, use it for medical research, then cremate and return the ashes, ALL for no charge.
Sounded like quite the option. So I started looking. I Googled and ended up finding this article by Rueters.
NOT what I expected, and definitely not what most intended.
Sickening, so I hope you don't read this immediately after dinner.
https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/usa-bodies-business/
I am hoping this thread may develop into something we can all learn more from as eventually we all need to make arrangements, either for ourselves or a loved one. COSTS are always a major factor. Funeral expenses are simply outrageous as these business' know that we do not have a lot of choices, nor do we have a lot of time to wait and 'shop' for providers.
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I haven't read the article yet, but I do want to say how sorry I am about your wife. I hope you are wrong.
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I was just telling my wife tonight that we needed to remove donate body to research from our wills because of similar stories in the past year. But we don’t remember what we choose because it was all or nothing with donation, so no organ harvesting first. I’ll need to review the paperwork but for us the organ donation is important.
Also sorry you have to be researching this.
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I'm so sorry Charlie. Be sure to get your children's input on funeral arrangements-
I hate the idea of spending huge sums of money to end up 6 ft under- I know funeral directors provide a service but fees seem disproportionate. My elderly neighbor died without family; dead two days before found, then frozen for a month getting legal issues resolved; the funeral home thawed her out, dolled her up for an open casket viewing. There were only 5 people at the funeral- cost was $18,000. Criminal.
I've been looking into a 'green' burial- no embalming just buried in a cardboard box or linen shroud. Unfortunately, my cemetery requires a 'vault'-- so I'm working to educate the cemetery board members. I think the younger generation would be more likely to use a cemetery if a green burial was an option.
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My mother willed her body to a med school. They studied and practiced on her for 2 years and when the time came, they held a private funeral service, played bagpipes and buried her cremated remains at their own private cemetery on campus. I can go and visit her there any time. They even planted flowers. Didn't cost me or her a dime. She simply submitted her request early and they approved. All I had to do was call the mortuary and they picked her up and transported her over to the med school and it was the med school who notified me of when it was time for her funeral. Family was allowed to attend. It was all handled in a respectful manner and how my mother wanted it. Went smooth. Maybe there are med schools near you that offer such a program. Sorry you might be going thru this but better to get your ducks in a row now and not later. It will give you a peace of mind and you will feel better about her final resting place.
https://medicine.missouri.edu/departments/pathology-and-anatomical-sciences/gift-of-body
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Thanks PT. I am planning on calling the U of Columbbia, MO and ask about donating directly to them for both of us. They are right across the street from the VA where I go and I have been sent over there a number of times when my Dr at the VA couldn't schedule me in quick enough.
Funny, the U Professor/Dr is my same Dr at the VA.
I feel I am Blessed.
From what I have read so far, a direct donation to a specific med school they and only they can benefit from the donate. They cannot sell, rent or give any body material elsewhere.
I will check that out to be sure.
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That's what my husband chose also. We donated his body to Tufts Medical School. It was all quite seamless. But I have to say that 2 years down the line when I was notified that the burial/funeral would be happening soon, it was a bit of shock. Only because I wasn't expecting it. The "funeral" was pleasant-a bulk ceremony. I have never visited since, but I don't feel a connection to someone's bones. I had my own "connection" to his memory.
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Charlie, first, I am sorry about your wife. It is a process that is extremely hard. We have signed up for Science Care.com. I hope you will check it out. My friend used their services and was very happy with the results.
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Charlie, I hope your wife gets better.
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Sorry about your wife Charlie, like kickingandscreaming I'm hoping you are wrong, but both of you are in my thoughts either way.
I am hoping this thread may develop into something we can all learn more from as eventually we all need to make arrangements, either for ourselves or a loved one.
I had a serious scare when first diagnosed with kidney trouble because an idiot doctor thought there was a 50% chance I'd be dead within six months. Then another scare when my leg problem was discovered and then there was a real probability (this time more than 50%) that I would die. That convinced me I had to make arrangements.
I am unmarried so my sister holds all the details. This includes the fact that I want all mourners at the funeral to wear the ceremonial robes of the high council of Gallifrey, and as a result my entire family are hoping they die before me!
My sister also holds all my passwords etc, especially bank and PayPal, she will need them to sort out my financial affairs.
Oh, and I pity the fool who has to sort out all the junk in my apartment!
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Hello Charlie, I send you and your wife Patsy all my best wishes and I do hope she is getting better and I send you both my heartfelt best wishes from Kristina. :grouphug;.
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I'm so sorry that your wife is not doing well. I have thought a lot about death and the cost of burials. There is a dialog now on this subject with websites such as http://www.orderofthegooddeath.com/. I think I make people uncomfortable talking about this subject but I want to be sure my family understands that I don't want a lot of interventions and I'm all for being buried on the cheap. If there's a way to make it green, so much the better. I have a relative with a "spare no expense" on funerals (the money is never her own) and I'm sorry I never pushed back. Another relative has made plans to donate his body to a university. My husband and I would like to have our burials planned and paid for (talk about a bucket list item). My dad did that and even though not all his wishes were followed, it was a wonderful gift to his family to have so much of it in place and paid for. I haven't read the article though. Thank you for posting this subject.