I Hate Dialysis Message Board

Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: General Discussion => Topic started by: Rain on October 23, 2012, 05:46:17 PM

Title: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Rain on October 23, 2012, 05:46:17 PM
I am not sure if this the right forum to place this and forgive me if it's not  Ican't think straight.

As some of you know my mother is on dialysis and has type 1 diabetes and has stuggled for many years.  She has also been on dialysis for the last 10 years.    Anyways my mother passes away this morning.  She was only 57.  Her body just gave out. 

Can you keep her  and my family in your thoughts and prayers.


Once I was able to collect myself this morning I called dialysis to coordinate my treatments in my home town so I could make the funeral arrangements.  Within an hour all the arrangements where made for my dialysis.  This has been the fastest dialysis coordination I have ever had and it was stress free.   
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: justme15 on October 23, 2012, 06:25:05 PM
I'm so sorry!! My mom was on dialysis and passed away last year.  Today for some reason it really hit me hard that she is gone.  I pray for comfort for you during this time.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: jbeany on October 23, 2012, 06:29:24 PM
 :grouphug;  You are never too old to feel like a lost orphan without your mom.   :cuddle;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: jeannea on October 23, 2012, 06:33:47 PM
I'm so sorry you lost your mom. Peace to you and your family. :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: AguynamedKim on October 23, 2012, 06:34:18 PM
Rain, I'm so sorry for your loss. :'(
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Joe on October 23, 2012, 07:37:51 PM
Thoughts and prayers for all that is needed by you and your family.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Sydnee on October 23, 2012, 08:25:53 PM
Sorry for your loss. We will be praying for you and your family.
It's hard to lose your mom.   :'(
 :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: galvo on October 23, 2012, 08:42:42 PM
I feel for you in your sorrow. May she rest in peace!
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: RichardMEL on October 23, 2012, 10:17:39 PM
oh sweet Rain I'm so sorry to read this - so very young :(((((((((((((

I know you just have to get on with it, deal with your D, organise things etc - such a difficult time... you are in our thoughts.

 :cuddle; :cuddle; :cuddle; :cuddle; :cuddle; :cuddle;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Jean on October 24, 2012, 12:55:56 AM
So sorry to hear of your loss. Every ones Mom is precious to them and I am sorry you had to go thru this with her being so young.   :pray;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: okarol on October 24, 2012, 01:17:24 AM
Oh Rain, I am so sorry. She was my age, and it just seems too young to me. Sending you lots of love.  :'( :cuddle;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: brenda seal on October 24, 2012, 06:53:48 AM
Rain , I am so sorry for your loss .
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Wat76 on October 24, 2012, 06:55:45 AM
Sorry to hear the news, my prayers are with you and your family.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Whamo on October 24, 2012, 07:12:22 AM
Sorry about your loss.   :pray;  May she rest in peace.  God bless her soul.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Alex C. on October 24, 2012, 07:18:30 AM
I lost my mother nearly 10 years ago, when she was 76. She had always been healthy, so when her kidneys failed in her mid 50's, it was a surprise. But, she managed to keep going through dialysis, a kidney transplant, then a later failure of the transplant, followed by a few more years of dialysis, followed by a second transplant, a broken hip, and in the end, cancer. Despite all the doctor's reassurances, the reality of PKD is that it does reduce your lifespan.

I'm at the point in my life now where my own kidney problems have me at the threshold of needing dialysis, and I wish my mom was still here to give advice.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: johnswife on October 24, 2012, 08:00:23 AM
I'm also sooo very sorry and I wish you strength and peace during this hard time. God bless you and your family;)
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: cdwbrooklyn on October 24, 2012, 08:07:13 AM
My condolences Rain...may God be with you and your family for these difficult times.    He will give you and your family peace and understanding.  Stay strong. 
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: MooseMom on October 24, 2012, 08:12:32 AM
Oh Rain, I am so sorry to hear this.  My own mom died a little over two years ago, and I'm still rather in shock.  She lived to be 82, though, despite being on dialysis for the last five years of her life, so I can't imagine what it must be like to lose your mom when she is only 57.  She really struggled with dialysis, so I never felt like I could burden her with my worries about my own descent toward D.  I know that sounds very selfish, but I wish I could have had her support.  I'm sure she would have given it had I asked for it, but I just couldn't, you know?  Did you ever feel like that, Rain?

You are in my thoughts at this very sad time.   :cuddle;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Mr. B 123 on October 24, 2012, 10:03:49 AM
Sorry to hear about about your Mother, I lost my Mom in in February and can understand your pain.  God bless.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Lillupie on October 24, 2012, 11:04:07 AM
Im so sorry at 57. She was only 57. Now I feel bad for complaining about my mom on here.  :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: billybags on October 24, 2012, 11:07:05 AM
Rain I am so sorry for your loss.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Rain on October 24, 2012, 12:33:50 PM
Moosemom
When my kidneys failed I was devastated but I sucked it up because my mom has been thru so much more and was still in good spirits.  The couple of years her good mood started fading.  She had only 1 access site left and went through a transplant that rejected hours after surgery.  I knew she was hanging around because of me.  The last few weeks she has been telling me I have to let her go.  I am happy knowing that my father and her had a great day on Monday before she passed.  I also have comfort knowing she is no longer in pain.  Near the end dialysis was painful for her that her bones would ache for hours afterward. 
But I do miss her. 

Does the emptiness feeling get better?  I have also been getting sever headache since yesterday.  My bf thinks its due to the stress of the situation.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: MooseMom on October 24, 2012, 01:09:30 PM
Moosemom
When my kidneys failed I was devastated but I sucked it up because my mom has been thru so much more and was still in good spirits.  The couple of years her good mood started fading.  She had only 1 access site left and went through a transplant that rejected hours after surgery.  I knew she was hanging around because of me.  The last few weeks she has been telling me I have to let her go.  I am happy knowing that my father and her had a great day on Monday before she passed.  I also have comfort knowing she is no longer in pain.  Near the end dialysis was painful for her that her bones would ache for hours afterward. 
But I do miss her. 

Does the emptiness feeling get better?  I have also been getting sever headache since yesterday.  My bf thinks its due to the stress of the situation.

Even though I was diagnosed with fsgs back in Jan 1992, it didn't become an issue, ie, I didn't realize how badly my renal function had declined, until October 2004.  I'm sure my mom was in shock; no one wants to find out that their only child has an incurable illness.

At the time, my mom had recently remarried (my father had died a few years before), and she was embarking on a new phase of her life.  She was in her mid 70s.  Some months later, she was diagnosed with an aortic aneurysm.  During the surgery to have it repaired, her spleen was damaged, and she had to have an immediate second surgery to remove it.  By what I've come to understand, the first surgery required having the blood flow to her kidneys stopped temporarily so that they could repair the aneurysm.  Unfortunately, this caused her kidneys to fail, so the operation that saved her life also destroyed her kidneys.  It took a very long time for her to recover from that experience (if she ever truly did "recover"), so I never felt like I could really unburden myself to her.  Compared to what she had to endure, my troubles seemed so minute.  So I can really understand "sucking it up".

I can't say that I feel "empty".  My mother was just short of 82 when she passed away, so I had a long time with her.  She didn't die young like your mom did.  Technically, my mother died from septicemia from a UTI.  I spent 10 days with her in ICU, and it was horrible, just horrible.  While I miss my mother terribly, I am so very thankful that her suffering has ended.  I will always be haunted by her last days.

I do hope that the empty feeling gives way to happy memories.   :cuddle;
I wouldn't be surprised if your headaches are due to stress, but since you do have CKD, I don't think you should dismiss them out of hand.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: boswife on October 24, 2012, 02:12:47 PM
Im so sorry Rain...  It's so hard and i thought for some reason i was going to bipass that heart ache..  But no, i lost my mom a little over two years as well and though it does get better, i still sometimes break down in heavy tears missing her.  Im feeling a terrable dislike for failing kidneys (my mom was not kidney related,, she was 90) as i read all this. and wish it would just go away.  I wish you health, and peace, and comfort.  Blessings on you and all your loved ones.   :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Ricksters on October 24, 2012, 03:21:57 PM
Rain, I am sorry for your loss.  No matter how old we are, it is never easy to losea parent.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.


Ricki
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: MaryJoe on October 24, 2012, 03:54:46 PM
Rain, I'm very sorry that you have lost your mom.  I hope you have lots of loved ones around to help you get through this difficult time.  The empty feeling will fade, but I don't know that it will ever go away completely. You and your family will be in my thoughts.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: amanda100wilson on October 24, 2012, 04:28:09 PM
I am sorry. this really brings into focus our own shortened lifespan.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Traveller1947 on October 26, 2012, 04:39:30 AM
 Your mom was very young to die, Rain, and YOU are very young to have lost her.  Nothing I can say will be of much comfort now, but know that my heart aches for you and that I'm sending loving thoughts to bring you peace.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: ChrisEtc on October 26, 2012, 06:04:12 AM
I'm so sorry for your loss.  Dialysis is so bittersweet.  It keeps you alive and kills you at the same time.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Rerun on October 26, 2012, 08:36:34 AM
Rain, I'm so sorry for your loss.  My deepest sympathy go out to you and your family.  May your Momma rest in peace.

            :pray;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: deniferfer on October 26, 2012, 09:37:03 AM
Rain I so sorry for your loss. My mom just turned 55 a couple days ago. So yeah 57 is far too young for her to have passed away. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Take care of yourself and know that we are all here for you

 :cuddle; :cuddle; :grouphug; :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Whamo on October 26, 2012, 09:57:24 AM
God bless your mother's soul, and may she rest in peace.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: newgrl on October 26, 2012, 11:18:57 AM
I am not sure if this the right forum to place this and forgive me if it's not  Ican't think straight.

As some of you know my mother is on dialysis and has type 1 diabetes and has stuggled for many years.  She has also been on dialysis for the last 10 years.    Anyways my mother passes away this morning.  She was only 57.  Her body just gave out. 

Can you keep her  and my family in your thoughts and prayers.


Once I was able to collect myself this morning I called dialysis to coordinate my treatments in my home town so I could make the funeral arrangements.  Within an hour all the arrangements where made for my dialysis.  This has been the fastest dialysis coordination I have ever had and it was stress free.   

Rain,

I am so sorry for your loss!

NewGrl
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: lmunchkin on October 28, 2012, 05:50:20 PM
I sure hate to hear this news Rain.  May God give you peace during this time.  Im 58, so I feel like she should have lived a long life.  Like Boswife, I really hate this disease and to sit and watch it destroy our loved ones is just so very hard to take!

Again, my condolences, Rain.  Im so very Sorry!!!!

lmunchkin
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: tiredandthirsty on October 28, 2012, 05:54:43 PM
so sorry to hear this. lots of thoughts and prayers to you and your family.   :cuddle;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: MomoMcSleepy on October 31, 2012, 07:53:39 AM
Rain, I'm so sorry that you lost your mom.  Take care of yourself, we are thinking of you.
 :pray;
Praying for you, too.
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: AnnieB on October 31, 2012, 03:58:01 PM
 :grouphug; :grouphug; :grouphug;
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: Rain on November 03, 2012, 08:56:53 PM
Thanks everyone.   I might be taking a break from the forum for a bit to rest and heal.  It's been a tough  couple of weeks. 
Title: Re: Lost my Mother today..
Post by: kitkatz on November 06, 2012, 07:30:47 PM
God bless you and your family.