I Hate Dialysis Message Board

Dialysis Discussion => Dialysis: General Discussion => Topic started by: bette1 on January 14, 2010, 01:25:50 PM

Title: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: bette1 on January 14, 2010, 01:25:50 PM
My Dad passed away on December 23rd after a long battle with lung cancer.  I thought I was OK with it because he had been sick so long that his death was not a surprise.  Grief has been hitting me hard lately and I am really not looking forward to the memorial service.  We had a great relationship, and he was a great Dad, but the prospect of not seeing him ever again is really hurting me.  I almost feel guilty for crying because I know he wouldn't want me too.  I just posted this here because I needed to get it off my chest and I know you guys are wonderful.  Thanks for reading.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: okarol on January 14, 2010, 01:29:41 PM
I am so sorry Bette. It's hard and you're going to hurt for awhile. My dad died a long time ago, and while the pain of losing him is never gone, it's offset by the feeling that he is always close to me. I can't really explain it, but I know he will never leave me. Sending you lots of hugs and love  :cuddle; :cuddle; :cuddle;
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: monrein on January 14, 2010, 01:30:18 PM
Hang in there Bette.  I'm sorry for your loss and your grief.  I'll think of you on Saturday and hope that you can find comfort in the memories you have of your Dad and solace in the gift that was your relationship with him.   :grouphug;
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: dwcrawford on January 14, 2010, 01:31:23 PM
Oh my, I'm sure he'd want you to feel better and crying will made you feel better.  Cry.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Brianna! on January 14, 2010, 01:39:20 PM
My dad died a year ago. So I know what you're going through somewhat. My dad's death wasn't expected (I dunno if that's the right word) like yours was, though. I'll be thinking of you on Saturday. <3
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: willowtreewren on January 14, 2010, 02:10:23 PM
Grief affects each of us differently. You will take your own journey in your own way.

Sending warm thoughts to help you through this.

Aleta
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: YLGuy on January 14, 2010, 03:56:34 PM
I am so sorry for your loss.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Hanify on January 14, 2010, 03:58:57 PM
I don't think it matters how expected the death is - it's just rotten to lose your parent!  Cry away I say - and remember the good times.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: tyefly on January 14, 2010, 04:39:27 PM
   Yes   I feel for you ....its hard..... I have lost all my elders......   and one by one  it so hard to deal with .......
             time will  be your best friend....
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Sluff on January 14, 2010, 08:12:07 PM
I too can understand what you are going through. I lost both parents within 3 years of eachother and they were both so young. My thoughts are with you.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Lillupie on January 14, 2010, 11:19:50 PM
I am so sorry that you as well as any of us who are greiving over the loss of loved ones are having to go through this, as well as kidney disease. I think it is even harder on us then it is for most people because we are the ones who have to deal with an extra hardship on top of the day to day crap in our lives.

Lisa
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Jean on January 14, 2010, 11:40:13 PM
So sorry to hear of your loss. For us "daddy's girls" who had a great Dad, it is especially hard. Cry if you need to, you will feel just a tad better after the service I think, most do. My parents died one year and 6 days apart, both in January. My son died in January. I hate January.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: bette1 on January 15, 2010, 06:48:36 AM
THank you so much.  I really don't like to talk about my problems too much in real like but I feel safe here.  You guys understand
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: Slywalker on January 15, 2010, 09:21:09 AM
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.  Like Sluff I also lost my parents within three years of each other, my dad passed away first and it was unexpected and by today's standards they were young (in their early 60's.)  The memorial service will help have a little closure.   Don't be afraid to cry as it is a natural reaction to have during the grief process.  It will take time but eventually you'll be able to smile through the tears because of the memories you have stored away. 
 :grouphug;   :grouphug;   :grouphug; 

Take care now.
Title: Re: My Dad's memorial is Saturday
Post by: HubbysPartner on January 15, 2010, 09:52:18 AM
I'm sorry to hear about your loss.  I lost my mom to lung cancer this past December.  We were very close and it was tough.  I was glad to have the memorial service, though, because I got to hear what other people thought of my mom and their experiences.  Now I have even more things to remember and enjoy about my mom.  It will be hard for a while, but it does get easier as time goes by.  You are in my prayers.