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Author Topic: I said a most awful thing  (Read 3285 times)
twirl
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« on: August 25, 2008, 02:20:43 PM »

my husband and I are on pins and needles waiting for the lung cat scan results
it does not look like the outcome will be good
we were keeping Trasie another night and I was too tired
she is almost 2 and full of energy and my daughter will not let her have a binki or a bottle
he thought I just did not want to keep her
I told him I hope you have something wrong with you and then you will know how I feel
I feel horrible about saying that and I am so sorry
people you live with sometimes do not have a clue
I love Trasie and love keeping her but I was so tired
now I feel like the bitch I am
I have been sad all day and then a member made me laugh - I was reading a post that a member wrote
had not laughed all day
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twirl
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« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2008, 02:24:37 PM »

OMG
it is Aug 25
my wedding anniversary
we celebrated early
but still.....
when I was teaching I always got flowers at my school
I just thought of this day as I was writing the above post :shy;

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paris
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« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2008, 02:49:56 PM »

It is easy to say things when you are tired and in pain.  Your husband knows you didn't mean it.  It is so hard to keep up a normal pace with this disease and then add worry on top of it--well, you are on overload.  Plus, you are missing school.    :grouphug;   


 Happy Anniversay!  August is a good month for anniversaries. Ours was the 20th. 
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pelagia
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« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2008, 02:54:35 PM »

It happens Twirl.  Maybe you can tell him that you are sorry in retrospect that you said that and explain how tired you felt at the time.  An apology doesn't always make things better, but it's always a good start in my book.  :cuddle;
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
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« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2008, 03:15:21 PM »

Good advice from P and P!!!

Happy Anniversary!!!!  :2thumbsup;
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Sunny
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Sunny

« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2008, 03:23:35 PM »

Just tell him your sorry and didn't mean it. Then explain how tired you become taking care of a 2 year old. Even an average healthy person can
become tired when caring for a 2 year old, and you have kidney disease on top of it all.
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Sunny, 49 year old female
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willieandwinnie
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« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2008, 03:44:45 PM »

twirl,  :grouphug; :grouphug; :cuddle; :flower; :flower;

Give your husband a big hug and say your sorry. Then put it  :sir ken; you.

Happy Anniversary.  :cuddle;
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David13
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« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2008, 03:48:29 PM »

I am sure your hubby knows you didn't mean it, Twirl.  We all get tired and cranky sometimes.  If he loves you half as much as we all do, I am sure he has already forgotten it.   :cuddle;
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“The first human being who hurled an insult instead of a stone was the founder of civilization” - Sigmund Freud
monrein
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« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2008, 03:48:56 PM »

Feel better Twirl, say sorry and move on.  I'm sorry are two very frequent words at my house and I know I've said many things I've later regretted.  Hugs and smiles to you. :flower; :grouphug; :flower;
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Pyelonephritis (began at 8 mos old)
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Joe Paul
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« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2008, 04:25:04 PM »

Happy Anniversary twirl, I know its not a bunch of flowers, but its the thought that counts   :flower;  Many more Happy Anniversary's to you and your Hubby!!
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pelagia
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« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2008, 05:11:19 PM »

and I forgot to say HAPPY ANNIVERSARY   :guitar:
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
okarol
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« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2008, 05:32:11 PM »



We all say things we shouldn't - just grab him and hug him and tell him "who's your favorite bitch?"
Just kidding, but these things happen. I hope you get past it & have a happy anniversary!  :bestwishes;
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
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Ang
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« Reply #12 on: August 25, 2008, 05:57:00 PM »

hey  cheryl


happy  anniversary
big  hug  usually  goes  someway  to  fixing  the  problem
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« Reply #13 on: August 25, 2008, 06:10:40 PM »

Happy Anniversary. My wife says alot of mean things and never apologizes, but I still forgive her. So i'm sure if you apologize he will forget about it.  Do aologize though because I can honestly remember things and even though I forgave and looked past it rationalizing it out without the apology, I really don't know if she meant the things she said. Good luck.  :grouphug;
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del
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« Reply #14 on: August 25, 2008, 06:19:17 PM »

Just hug him and tell him your sorry  :cuddle; He'll understand.  Happy Anniversary  :flower; :flower;  Celebrate as you've never celebrated before.  :rofl;  :flower;
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kitkatz
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« Reply #15 on: August 25, 2008, 06:30:19 PM »

Hey Lady.   Sometimes the mouth gets a hold of me and I blather away at hubby.  I agree with what Okarol said.  Who loves ya baby? is a good question to ask him. Apologize and give him a big hug.
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G-Ma
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« Reply #16 on: August 25, 2008, 06:30:57 PM »

Happy Anniversary to both of you and everyone gave you great advice especially the apologize part.  Do apologize and then let it go, give a hug and dance awhile.
Love you
Ann


 :flower;
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
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TynyWonder
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Calvin

« Reply #17 on: August 25, 2008, 08:33:40 PM »

Happy Anniversary first of all!!!!   :bandance;

I was just going to throw my   :twocents; in here.  I KNOW I have said MANY regretful (probably on here already) things and I am a BIG card person and I LOVE to leave cards where friends/family will later find them.  Why don't you run out or even make a card apologizing and leave it in a place where he will later find it?   I bet that will make you and him both feel a little better. Just a thought is all..........but like everyone else has said........he may have already forgotten about it. 
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Diagnosed with ESRD-November 2006
I have had 2 fistuals-neither one worked
I have had 2 grafts the last one finally "took"
I had 3 different catheters from Nov. 06 - Dec. 08
Got on the transplant list - Halloween Day 2008

You can easily judge the character of others by how they treat those who they think can do nothing for them.    I BELIEVE THIS TO BE SOOOOO TRUE!
twirl
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« Reply #18 on: August 25, 2008, 08:43:40 PM »

thank you everyone
you are dear to me
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twirl
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« Reply #19 on: August 28, 2008, 06:53:36 PM »

we got the results tonight
our doc forgot to tell us she was going on vacation this week
she said we would know Tues and here it is Thurs night
another doc had to call us b/c we were upset about having to wait
my husband has no signs of cancer
but he does have emphysema
I'm not sure what that is----- fluid on lungs?
but no cancer
and thanks for all your posts-
made me feel better
cheryl
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okarol
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« Reply #20 on: August 28, 2008, 06:57:54 PM »

 :banghead; Vacation?? Jeeez!
I am so happy to hear there is no cancer!
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
G-Ma
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« Reply #21 on: August 28, 2008, 06:59:33 PM »

 :yahoo; no cancer.  Sleep well tonight.
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
GOD IS GOOD
Romona
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« Reply #22 on: August 28, 2008, 07:15:32 PM »

I am happy too! No cancer is good news.  :2thumbsup;

I'm sure that wasn't the first time and won't be the last time you get mad at yourself.
We are all human and do the same thing.  :grouphug;
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pelagia
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« Reply #23 on: August 28, 2008, 08:55:44 PM »

 :flower; the best news all day!
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
Mimi
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« Reply #24 on: August 28, 2008, 11:08:44 PM »

We all have been there, Twirl.  Just say the little prayer 'Lord keep your hand over my mouth.'
Happy Anniversary!!!!! and
Thank God it isn't cancer.

Love, Mimi
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it is putting out the lamp because the dawn has come.
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