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jessup
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Gemma - the tucker monster

« Reply #25 on: November 15, 2008, 06:11:49 PM »

First day of school   2008
Me the teacher
26 x Year 1,2,3 children
All lined up in 2 lines, seated with their legs crossed, lunch boxes in laps (sitting on concrete outside classroom)
Parents sitting on outside tables
First bell goes to remind everyone that class doors will open in 5 mins
Me walks along the lines and welcomes each child and checks that they have recess and lunch
Get to little 5 year old and notice no food
I ask him "Do you have recess or lunch in your bag sweetie?"
He shakes his head and says "no"
I then said "Well does Mummy know you haven't got any food?"
He nods yes
"What did Mummy say sweetie?"
The cute 5yr old replies "Just fu#$ off and go to school"

 :shy; :rofl;
I took a breath and said okay
Went to the front of the line and the doors were opened and we all went in class

Got to meet Mummy later and I know he spoke verbatim
God love kids
I get a laugh everyday
« Last Edit: November 15, 2008, 06:32:57 PM by jessup » Logged
twirl
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« Reply #26 on: November 15, 2008, 06:16:38 PM »

I had a student tell me her dad's phone number was 1-800- asshole
one mother gave me a number to reach her after 6pm and it turned out to be a beer joint on highway 105
a mother came into a conference about her child using horrible language in the class
" I don't know where he gets that GD Fu----ing shit from"
and one mother told us her daughter was trying to get pregant by another student and the other student was her first cousin
oh the memories
the best days of my life----- teaching
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jessup
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Gemma - the tucker monster

« Reply #27 on: November 15, 2008, 06:28:09 PM »

I had a student tell me her dad's phone number was 1-800- asshole
one mother gave me a number to reach her after 6pm and it turned out to be a beer joint on highway 105
a mother came into a conference about her child using horrible language in the class
" I don't know where he gets that GD Fu----ing shit from"
and one mother told us her daughter was trying to get pregant by another student and the other student was her first cousin
oh the memories
the best days of my life----- teaching

 Classic mate
:rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :yahoo; :rofl; :rofl; :clap;

I'm sure you and  I could continue for ever with our memories of school and kids and laughing at them and occassionally with them
Cheap entertainment on call every day
I have been teaching for 24yrs
You?
First day I told a child to ...

I told a 6yr old who was not on task to .....
"Pull up your socks and get on with your work."
God love her
She bent over in her chair, looked down, then looked at me and said
"I don't have any socks"
 :yahoo; :yahoo;
I replied "well then ... now you only have to follow one instruction ...."
She put he head down and got on with her work.
« Last Edit: November 15, 2008, 07:42:30 PM by jessup » Logged
kitkatz
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« Reply #28 on: November 16, 2008, 11:16:51 AM »

I had a child convinced last year that I new everything.
 He had turned to another student and had asked:"What is they name of the dog in the Garfield comic strip?"
 I was walking by passing out papers and whipped my head around and said;"Odie." 
The kid turned to the other kids in his row and said:"Wow! She does know everything!"
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
twirl
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« Reply #29 on: November 16, 2008, 02:14:08 PM »

when I was teaching I had a laugh a day or more
you have to laugh or you will cry
one student gave me SpongeBob underwear, I love Spongebob
my junior high was connected to the high school and I got to see some students for years
tests answers were really hilarious
I miss it so much
I though you were only 26 years old
one kid told me I must be an awesome mom
I did not report it when he said "p*ck', if you knew this kid's home life --- OMG
he said it in a moment of rage
my own children better not say that word but then they are coming from a whole different home life
one girl was molested and I was the only person she would talk too
so I spent the night at the police department
funny, how many times I was called mom by junior high and high school students
I love those kids and I had some real cases
one kid had to rub a rock everytime it thundered
and he had an extremely high IQ
my children are friends with one of my first student's chlidren
we are now very close friends
funny how life is
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kitkatz
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« Reply #30 on: November 16, 2008, 04:52:27 PM »

I had high school kids come by and visit me this year.  I had them in class and they were trouble the entire time, but are doing great now.  I think I had some effect on their lives.
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
twirl
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« Reply #31 on: November 17, 2008, 09:35:20 AM »

I got an email from a former student who told me I made her love to read
I taught the novel, The Outsiders and she said it is still her favorite novel
it was the first book she ever read that she did not want to put down
I saved the email
she said I forced them to read and now she loves it

Kitz, you know you make a difference
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thegrammalady
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« Reply #32 on: November 17, 2008, 11:26:32 AM »

the story i remember best isn't mine, but my grandmother's. she was 18, her first teaching job, in a one room school and the boys were bigger than she was!
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s
......................................................................................
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning how to dance in the rain.

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

Meddle Not In The Affairs Of Dragons
For You Are Crunchy And Taste Good With Ketchup
twirl
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« Reply #33 on: November 17, 2008, 01:43:26 PM »

I love those stories about the early days of teaching
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jessup
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Gemma - the tucker monster

« Reply #34 on: November 17, 2008, 01:58:25 PM »

First day memories ... teaching Sex Ed to year 6 and 7's

Had co-ed lesson where children were split into small groups (approx.8 ch'n per group) to brainstorm what they knew and what they wanted to know
about STD's, contraception and hygiene.  Groups were laying and sitting on carpeted floor. 

Me the teacher moved from one group to another encouraging dialogue.  When time was up for the brainstorming session all groups stood up and formed a large circle around.....
my female sanitary commodities

 :shy; :shy; :shy; :shy;

they fell out of my pocket when I was laying on the floor

So I very bravely went over to the entire class group and ....
said "oh , they're mine" and picked them up and put them back in my pocket.

Geez

I still have those students talk about it 20 bloody years later.  They reckon they couldn't believe how "cool" I was about it because they thought it was so embarrassing.
A lot of past students still invite me to birthday parties and when I turn up this story always gets told
again and again and again
Apparently only a few told their parents
 :rofl; :rofl; :2thumbsup; :rofl; :yahoo;
 
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twirl
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« Reply #35 on: November 17, 2008, 02:43:28 PM »

I had a miscarriage and returned to work still upset
this student had a runny nose
I asked him if he wanted a kotex
I was thinking Kleenex
his reply was --- no!
he was in 8th grade at the time
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