Hello

[The Wife]

Mimi,

The quote you posted is in regards to getting LL to the hospital or trusting the doctors.  The first doctor that was trying to figure out what was wrong with him gave him medication that was fatal for people with kidney problems.  They already knew his kidneys were in trouble but they didn't know he had Hep C.  When he was two, he needed to have all of his blood changed within six hours or he would have died.  This created a terrible fear of needles and just to get him to have blood tests was something else.  When they discovered the Hep C, they told him he was going to die and to get his affairs in order because he wouldn't live long enough to get a liver transplant. 

The second was the MRSA that was going around in the hospital.  Due to the Hep C, his immune system was down.  He also just found out about someone he knew who died due to MRSA.  So yeah, my hands were full from all ends.  I just didn't know what to do.  Do I keep him at home and hope he lives or do I send him to the hospital and hope MRSA doesn't kill him?  It was a hard choice knowing full well that in his condition, he was ripe for contacting the dreadful virus.

"What is it that brings healing to the emotions and healing to the soul?  A joyful heart." - Mimi
 
He may not have a joyful heart at this moment but I don't think that makes him bad.  One thing I've learned is to accept the emotions that come with illness, to allow another to be who they are in any given moment, and to love them unconditionally without judging how they're behaving or not behaving, or what they think or believe.  Sometimes, I simply remind myself that he is processing the hand he is dealt.  And when he's having a hard time emotionally, I know he is hurting or has only slept for an hour because the cramps just won't quit. 

So to answer your question, I'd have to say acceptance.  Acceptance brings peace.  Now for the joy part.  When you're physically hurting, it's not always easy to smile when in physical pain.  When I watch him experience the cramping, I know I wouldn't be feeling joyful.  Is it even possible? 

I read that we're not supposed to respond in this area.  If you'd like to continue this conversation, feel free to start a new thread in the appropriate area.  You know the board better than I do so I'll watch for a new post if that's what you would like to do.

Much love to you also Mimi. 

And...

Luck to Willie.

[kitkatz]

You have a way with words The Wife.  I loved your introduction.  It was an interesting way to start things.



Welcome.



Kitkatz,moderator

[Mimi]

So to answer your question, I'd have to say acceptance.  Acceptance brings peace.  Now for the joy part.  When you're physically hurting, it's not always easy to smile when in physical pain.  When I watch him experience the cramping, I know I wouldn't be feeling joyful.  Is it even possible?

I certainly understand what you are saying.  However I was not speaking of LL's physical pain {I really diidn't know at the time he had any.}  I was speaking of his depression and lonliness.  As I said in my PM to you, I am sorry if I gave
the impression I was judging him or trying to convert him.  Neither of those things ever entered my mind.
Again I wish only the best for both of you and the acceptance you need for peace.

Mimi

[Sluff]

I read that we're not supposed to respond in this area. If you'd like to continue this conversation, feel free to start a new thread in the appropriate area. You know the board better than I do so I'll watch for a new post if that's what you would like to do.

Thanks WIFE for noticing that the conversation should be moved to a new thread. Please remember that the introduce yourself thread is for introductions only. We have apparently been allowing too much of this on quite a few intro posts. I'm not picking on The Wife or Mimi, I just happened to speak up now. Also a reminder to everyone to use the spell check in all your posts.

Thank You

Sluff/ Admin

[kidney4traci]

I am glad you have decided to add yourself to the postings, you have a great gift of writing.  It is good for the soul to let it out and this is a great place of support to do it.  Sounds like you two have been through alot.  Life may never be the way it was, but with each other it can still be worth living.  I pray it all evens out soon.  Peace and love...

[Earlinda]

I just wanted to say Welcome to IHD!!  It is good to have you here and I love your style of writing.  You are absolutely right that this is a family of great people and I couldn't put into words any better the welcomes and words of support that they have already offered.  I hope that in time we can both learn from each other.  I can totally understand the feelings you have expressed and the trials and tribulations that you and Light Lizard have experienced on this ESRD journey.  Again  !!!!!

 
Earlinda