Ignorant things people have said to you

[Epoman]

Sometimes I wonder where/how some nurses get licensed. The nurse at my ob/gyn sees me every year and always ask me very nicely, with a kind of sad puppy look, if I'm still on dialysis, "Yes" I say; then she hands me the cup and points to the restroom and says "Just bring it up to the front when you're done." I'm often tempted to pour some Mountain Dew in there and turn it in.

Or some red Gatorade and shock them into thinking you are peeing blood. 

[okarol]

You guys are so funny!

I thought all the morons were attracted to just me. I think I have heard all of the above. Although my GP (local doctor) asked me if they transplant one or two kidneys. O.k that may sound reasonable..... but I was being worked up for a LIVE donation transplant! You would think she would know the answer!  aahhhhhhh

hehehe      Now that's a REALLY generous living donor!!

[KICKSTART]

First silly comment i had was while waiting around at the hospital, a woman sat next to me decided to tell me all her troubles , then asked what i was there for , When i told her i had kidney failure , she said , 'oh i've never heard of that , is it catching? Then there is my 'best' friend, who thinks my life is one long holiday, her passing comment was , 'oh your so lucky ,not having to go out to work every day'!!!

[devlinswife]

"I swear, by all that I've ever found holy, the next person who gives me a pitying look and says, "You're much too young to be this sick," is gonna get smacked."



I hate being told that!!! I am 29 now, but we found my kidney disease when I was 14, so I have heard it thousands of times.

[MooseMom]

I'm not on dialysis yet, but I've heard my share of stupid statements.

When I was first diagnosed with CKD, my now-ex-mother-in-law (who sees herself as an expert on nutrition) told me I should just drink more water.  She implied that it was my fault somehow that I had CKD, that I didn't drink enough.

[meadowlandsnj]

I'm not on dialysis yet, but I've heard my share of stupid statements.

When I was first diagnosed with CKD, my now-ex-mother-in-law (who sees herself as an expert on nutrition) told me I should just drink more water.  She implied that it was my fault somehow that I had CKD, that I didn't drink enough.

That reminds me, I've been having a sore throat and a cold all week and I told one of the nephrologists who does rounds at dialysis how I was feeling.  He looked at my throat and said it wasn't infected then he said to me (remember this is while I was on dialysis) Keep hydrated and drink a  lot of hot teas with lemon and honey.  I stared at him for a second and said If you say so.      Dumb ass!

LOL
 Donna

[DeLana]

That reminds me, I've been having a sore throat and a cold all week and I told one of the nephrologists who does rounds at dialysis how I was feeling.  He looked at my throat and said it wasn't infected then he said to me (remember this is while I was on dialysis) Keep hydrated and drink a  lot of hot teas with lemon and honey.  I stared at him for a second and said If you say so.      Dumb ass!

LOL
 Donna

Oh, no!  Well, at least it's not just nurses whose ignorance can be striking 

DeLana

[virrat]

The person who made a comment to me was not really being stupid or ignorant, but more insensitive than anything.  First, I will provide you with a little back story.  One time back in 1994, when I was taking my first run at this dialysis thing, I had decided I was just plain mentally tired of the whole dialysis process. The physical component is draining, but the real strength we have lies in the fact that we are able to walk through those clinic doors (hopefully with our heads held high) three times a week.  Anyway, on the night that I felt completely drained, I called up my grandmother and asked if I could stay with her.  She made me scrambled eggs (post dialysis munchies), I got a good night sleep and felt refreshed in the morning.  That day, I got the call for the transplant.  Part of me associates this good luck with my grandmother, who is very important to me.  Fast forward to this past summer.  I am now married to a wonderful woman who helps me through the rough times.  Unfortunately, she was in another city because her dear uncle passed away, so I was alone.  His death affected me, so I knew I was going to have one of those psychologically draining nights.  I decided to call my grandmother and ask if I could come over after dialysis. 

I was talking to my mom about this and she asked me why I was being such a wuss and why couldn't I be alone.  There have been a lot of postings about strangers, acquaintances and co-workers being ignorant, but when a family member asks the infamous question, it really throws you for a loop.

[okarol]

The person who made a comment to me was not really being stupid or ignorant, but more insensitive than anything.  First, I will provide you with a little back story.  One time back in 1994, when I was taking my first run at this dialysis thing, I had decided I was just plain mentally tired of the whole dialysis process. The physical component is draining, but the real strength we have lies in the fact that we are able to walk through those clinic doors (hopefully with our heads held high) three times a week.  Anyway, on the night that I felt completely drained, I called up my grandmother and asked if I could stay with her.  She made me scrambled eggs (post dialysis munchies), I got a good night sleep and felt refreshed in the morning.  That day, I got the call for the transplant.  Part of me associates this good luck with my grandmother, who is very important to me.  Fast forward to this past summer.  I am now married to a wonderful woman who helps me through the rough times.  Unfortunately, she was in another city because her dear uncle passed away, so I was alone.  His death affected me, so I knew I was going to have one of those psychologically draining nights.  I decided to call my grandmother and ask if I could come over after dialysis. 

I was talking to my mom about this and she asked me why I was being such a wuss and why couldn't I be alone.  There have been a lot of postings about strangers, acquaintances and co-workers being ignorant, but when a family member asks the infamous question, it really throws you for a loop.

  Mmmmm Grandma.
My grandmother was the most remarkable person. She made me feel so good.
Just being near her had a very calming effect on me. She died when Jenna was
almost 2.  I would love to be with her. I have her in my heart, but I wish I could
go to her house and feel that comfort! So I am with you! Enjoy it whenever you
can and especially when you need it!
Your mom is probably a little jealous. You don't ask her for that comfort, and
she may feel inadequate or something...? I don't know. Family can basically
suck! They say things that boggle the mind!

[thegrammalady]

if i cramp real bad and complain a few nurses like to say...you couldn't handle having a baby', then they do the breathing exercises in my face.  at first i didnt like it, but now i just joke along with em.

actually, lamaz breathing helps with the pain of cramps until you can get enough fluid to relieve them.


EDITED: Fixed quote tag error - Bajanne, Moderator

[kitkatz]

Did I post the dentist statement already?  I am at the dentist office Wednesday and he pops into the room and asks:
Have you your transplant yet?"   I have been seen here for three months at the most.  Transplant, yeah sure.  Ran right down to Walmart last month and got me one! Uh huh! Sure did!   Big Dummy!

[billoggblog]

Someone once said to me "You must be well up the list by now!"

Two of my friends met once, and one said to the other, "how's Bill I haven't seen him for ages" and he said, "haven't you heard Bill Died......
but he's alright now!"
What he should have said was Bill had to be taken back by the crash team

[angieskidney]

My nurse said to me "why don't you have a kidney already?" I was like "huh??" and I said, "I have been waiting since 2001" and she said, "Really that long? Well you should have had one by now!" and I said to her, "Do you realize how long the waiting list is? Plus I have had a transplant before so that means I have more antibodies and am harder to match this time around! Plus I have had a lot of blood trasfusions that also raise my antibodies!"

Turns out she thought I was not even complete the transplant workup because she hadn't heard about me doing it. Why would she know? I did that back in 2001 when I was on PD and not HD so there is no reason she would have known me. It seems she assumed that when she first met me in 2005 that was when I first "got sick"  And just because another guy in the HD unit (Al) got his transplant only a month after being put on the list that she thought it was THAT FAST!! She didn't understand first transplants get called faster than anyone waiting for their 2nd or third .. plus he was a different blood type than I.

But it is just what bugs me is the nurse seemed to assume it was something I was doing that was the reason for me not getting a transplant as of yet... Made me want to scream! !

[sherrile]

Just found this discussion, so thought I would add my 2 cents.  I had to sign Levi out at the school's office
to take him to dialysis, and the secretary said, well Can't you do that to him while he is in class??  yeah, right!!
Let's just roll up the machine while he's in P.E.!!  No problem right???  And maybe next time he has to have a surgical
procedure we will just have it in the class down the hall.  Some people are just clueless.
Sherri

[okarol]

Just found this discussion, so thought I would add my 2 cents.  I had to sign Levi out at the school's office
to take him to dialysis, and the secretary said, well Can't you do that to him while he is in class??  yeah, right!!
Let's just roll up the machine while he's in P.E.!!  No problem right???  And maybe next time he has to have a surgical
procedure we will just have it in the class down the hall.  Some people are just clueless.
Sherri

Yeah, show and tell. Good idea.
Idiot. and she has a JOB! 

[MyssAnne]

  How about chocolate? I'm not allowed to have it, nor nuts. Invariably I'll hear from people,
  oh, what a wonderful way to lose weight!! Gosh, you are so lucky!!!!  Excuse me?  For not
  being able to be happy with chocolate, I am happy?? Get a life!  I WANT MY CHOCOLATE
  (dark, of course)!!!!!

[boxman55]

I ran into a friends wife the other day and she asked me if I was going to a tanning salon I said no and my complextion was from the drugs they give me because of dialysis.. Well she goes "oh what a bonus" 

[angela515]

When I tell some nurses I had a kidney transplant, I get this response.. "Which kidney, or was it both?" Im like, wtf are you talking about? I HAD A TRANSPLANT, they put a NEW KIDNEY in me. 

[kimcanada]

I would have to say that its when people that don't have a clue what dialysis is are total experts on a dialysis diet.

Umm do you think you should be eating that?

I wouldn't think you can have bread.

Fruit, I thought fruit would near kill ya 

Kim

[kelliOR]

I was very fortunate to have a friend's husband donate his kidney to me.  When I told people that I was getting a kidney from someone I knew, many asked me "Oh, what is he dying of?"

[Bajanne]

Well, here in the Caribbean, people (older people) feel there is a bush for every ailment.  Just put some leaves in boiling water and make a tea.  That will help your kidney.  Just Saturday at the funeral of a lady who was on dialysis, the lady I sat next to rolled off a list of herbs that would help me.  And of course, she ended with the now unavoidable "And you must drink a lot of water.  That is your problem.  Drink a lot of water and it will help your kidneys" (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

[Wattle]

I was very fortunate to have a friend's husband donate his kidney to me.  When I told people that I was getting a kidney from someone I knew, many asked me "Oh, what is he dying of?"

Too funny Kelli    Maybe they thought you were going to 'bump' him off!   

[goofynina]

Well, here in the Caribbean, people (older people) feel there is a bush for every ailment.  Just put some leaves in boiling water and make a tea.  That will help your kidney.  Just Saturday at the funeral of a lady who was on dialysis, the lady I sat next to rolled off a list of herbs that would help me.  And of course, she ended with the now unavoidable "And you must drink a lot of water.  That is your problem.  Drink a lot of water and it will help your kidneys" (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Some people are just sooo clueless arent they?   

[kitkatz]

You are now an angel in heaven looking down at the water suggestion lady saying "Now look where I am!"

[ILOVEFLUID]

My sister in an argument with me one day, actually said, "well at least I haven't wasted the last 4 years of my life lying around pretending to be sick."

Or at a camping trip, one friend commented on how nice it must be to not have to go pee every few hours.

Or one friend said I was lucky I didn't have to go to work everyday.

And the same friend said how nice it must be to have my parents help me out financially instead of having to go to work and make money myself.

Yet, another friend told me it must be nice to be able to blame my weight on medication.

My goodness, am I ever surrounded by ignorant people.