Cremation vs. burial

[KR Cincy]

I want to be cremated, my ashes in a nice beer stein next to the keg at my wake. Friends may toast me <clank> as they recollect what a swell guy I was 

Damn...I hate missing good parties...<sigh>

[paddbear0000]

I want to be cremated, my ashes in a nice beer stein next to the keg at my wake. Friends may toast me <clank> as they recollect what a swell guy I was 

Damn...I hate missing good parties...<sigh>

     

[msawyersw]

Seriously, whatever your wishes, please make them known.  Let your family know what measures you want taken while alive (Advance Directives) and give them some (serious) suggestions for your memorial and burial.

I am writing as a social worker who has watched families struggle over what to do when a loved one (or not so loved one) is critically ill and fight over who is 'in charge' of making decisions. People have come from 'out of the woodwork' country to exert their authority in the hospital.  Sometimes, they have had no contact in years with the critically ill person.  Sometimes, we health professionals did not know these family members even existed.  Sometimes we find out that the person who was by the patient's side throughout the illness, and who was identified as a spouse or child, has no legal authority to make decisions.  Sometimes families quarrel to the extent that psychiatrists (to determine competency) and judges (to determine authority) become involved.   

I also have had personal experiences that altered my thinking and caused me to write my own Advance Directive and memorial wishes.
 
1)A relative's life saving surgery was held up by a question of who had legal authority for consent. (The surgical team stayed, although consent was delayed 4 hours, for which we are still grateful.)   

2) Another relative  died without any burial or memorial arrangements in place.  He said he did not care what was done beyond cremation. When he died, all of his children had exhausted work and FMLA leaves assisting in his care, and all lived out of state.  We put burial and memorial arrangements together quickly and gave him the best service we could provide, but with a minister who had never met him, and with costs we had not considered.

None of us wants to think about their own death.  However, as my father taught me, the mortality of the human race is 100%.   Writing Advance Directives and making burial and memorial arrangements (even providing suggestions) won't hasten our death. It does make it easier on those we leave behind. 


Best wishes,

Marcia Sawyer
Renal Social Worker

[kellyt]

Marcia, it's great to have you here!  I hope you check in regularly to share your knowledge!  I know I have questions...

 

[st789]

Cremation.  Ass goes to a clean and warm river surround by forest.

Simplicity

No need to follow up afterward.

[goofynina]

Cremation.  Ass goes to a clean and warm river surround by forest.Simplicity

No need to follow up afterward.

But where will the rest of you go??     sorry, i couldnt resist 

[st789]

Wait a min.  I believe I have more body parts than just an Ash!

U got me there Goofynina!  A moment of careless, a big laugh for everyone.

Happy Holidays!

[Stacy Without An E]

I've always wanted to be cremated.  I wish my ashes to be taken to the top of the North Tower of the Golden Gate Bridge and released. 

I imagine my genetic material will be ingested into the digestive system of some poor fish and then he'll need Dialysis.

Or into the system of some shark who will suddenly reach mainland and start his own radio show.

Or even into the belly of an octopus who will race to the nearest TV and endlessly watch Star Trek.

The possibilities are endless.

[Jannie]

My Aunt Betty always wore sweaters,even in the summer, she was always chilly. She told her kids not to put her in the cold ground, she wanted to be cremated.

[Falkenbach]

Cremation for me. Not to disrespect anybody by pointing this out, but I am an atheist so there's no belief against this process for me or my family.

My death will be followed by this procedure:

1. Organs to be donated.
2. Cremation (put me in a cardboard coffin thanks, no need to waste money).

[KR Cincy]

My Aunt Betty always wore sweaters,even in the summer, she was always chilly. She told her kids not to put her in the cold ground, she wanted to be cremated.

I've seen a few Christmas sweaters this week that should be creamated...yeesh...more isn't always better!!!

[oswald]

Cremation for me. Not to disrespect anybody by pointing this out, but I am an atheist so there's no belief against this process for me or my family.

not to disrespect you, but do you not follow any of the christian holidays such as christmas and easter?  i ask this because your avatar, with your pooch in it, looks like a christmas card.  just curious.  again, not to disrespect you please.   


EDITED: Fixed quote tag - okarol/moderator

[oswald]

sorry i don't know how to do quotes

[okarol]

sorry i don't know how to do quotes

To Quote, click the quote button, then just be sure that you begin typing AFTER the little tag that says [/quote.]

[Falkenbach]

Cremation for me. Not to disrespect anybody by pointing this out, but I am an atheist so there's no belief against this process for me or my family.

not to disrespect you, but do you not follow any of the christian holidays such as christmas and easter?  i ask this because your avatar, with your pooch in it, looks like a christmas card.  just curious.  again, not to disrespect you please.   


EDITED: Fixed quote tag - okarol/moderator

We celebrate the season, yes, with family get togethers and gift giving - probably for the sole reason of tradition. We do not have any religious element to our holiday celebrations, in our view. And thanks for the reminder, btw, it really is time to update that avatar now!

[Mimi]

For me, it is going to be burial, beside my two sons, and someday my husband.  I have already picked out what I am going to wear, sweatshirt with bears on it, sweatpants to match, Black fuzzy slipper, and a yellow turtleneck, I am going to be warm! The casket will be wood, and one song I want played "Amazing Grace".  Oh, and family only, close family. From there on I don't care.  When my son died, he wore his favorite baseball cap, Harley sweatshirt, and they took him from the funeral home with Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home".  Here, you can have it anyway you want it.   \\\
"The most dangerous person is the one not afraid to die.'

JBLadyB, you can forget about the black fuzzy slippers, they don't put shoes on corpses.
 
Mimi

[okarol]

My Aunt Betty always wore sweaters,even in the summer, she was always chilly. She told her kids not to put her in the cold ground, she wanted to be cremated.

I've seen a few Christmas sweaters this week that should be creamated...yeesh...more isn't always better!!!

 

[Bajanne]

This is something I need to think about.  My daughter and I were discussing death yesterday.  she was begging me to stay alive for another 20 years.  she said she would cremate my body.  I said I didn't want that, but I didn't have any good reason.  I really appreciated our resident social worker's advice.  I need to get my directives organized.

[petey]

I don't care either way.  I do have some MUST DO's for my "leaving" though.  I want to donate everything I possibly can --except, no body donation for medical research (see my next sentence for my views on people looking at me dead).  If it's a burial, NO open casket -- I don't want people looking at my dead body.  I have made a list of the people who can view my body (and it's not a long list).  I want my wedding rings on.  Short service.  Lots of music.  Happy and not sad.  If I'm cremated, I'd like for the ashes to be thrown into the ocean  - no service.  My husband wants to be buried.