Lessons

'Would that be water, or wine'?

A few months ago I was bound to an appointment at the clinic to get the dressings on my recent surgeries changed and I was gifted with the opportunity to learn one of the many ways that we can turn water into wine.

I had decided to take a different route to the clinic than I normally took and before I boarded the bus I asked the driver if I could get to my destination by his route. He assured me I could and told me which bus stop I should get off to transfer onto another bus that would be required to get me where I needed to go.

I sat near the driver, within the range of his vision through the rear-view mirror he used, so he would be able to see me and be reminded to tell me when we were approaching the stop I was to disembark the bus to continue my journey.

I saw the street sign that was the cross-street my other bus would travel down as we passed it! I suppose I should have made it clearer to the driver that I wasn't sure about which bus stop he was referring me to, and so I would need him to make me aware of when we were approaching that stop, so he didn't make me aware of it.

I suppose it was my error, really, but that didn't prevent me from feeling angry and frustrated with the driver when I had to walk quite a distance to make up for my mistake. I guess I should have asked him directly, to advise me when the stop I needed was getting close. Lesson learned.

I am not anywhere near one hundred percent of my physical strength or the endurance level that I was at before my illness made itself known to me. Plus, it was raining during the long, inconvienent, and eventually, enlightening walk.

As I attempted to maintain a reasonable pace and my balance,
I pondered on my anger and the knowledge of experience that reminded me of the fact that there is an appropriate time and place for anger and there is a time and place where the energy of anger is not useful, but can actually be harmful to us.

Anger can provide us with useful energy and incentive to make changes at times, if we are aware and vigilant in our awareness. Such as when someone nearby is in physical danger from a potential abuser. The anger we feel at the injustice of the aggressive assailant against a smaller and less powerful victim can be used to intervene for the sake of the downtrodden one, sometimes.

I felt my anger as an ache in the weakened and debilitated condition of my body and especially, my legs, which felt a burning, painful and dark sensation of tension that drained my energy, causing me to stumble, slightly, as if I had been drinking.

I realised that I had been slack about exercise and walking lately, due to the inclement weather we had been experiencing here on the west coast for almost three months now, and also, mainly because my weakened body was a little bit lazy, to be honest.

I resolved to get out and walk more, as had been my habit before the wet, cold weather and the necessity for surgery had been implemented in my life.

I suddenly realised that regardless of his motivation, if there was any, of the bus driver's lack of courtesy, intentionally or not, outside of my reaction or opinion of this event; the bus driver had done me three favours, after all.

He drove me to a location that -at least- was closer than I had been when I started my trip. He also directed me to a mental location where I was reminded of my need for more exercise, as well as inadvertantly, actually forcing me to get exercising immediately and to get the ball of healing rolling a bit sooner than my lazy self would have chosen, left to my own devices.

Suddenly, the dark, aching pain in my legs transformed into a warm, tingling sense of pleasure which expanded and flowed throughout my body and into my heart, where I felt the magnification of this pleasing sensation and the soothing, energising effects of an infusion of invigorating gratitude permeated my entire being, like a shower of light from the heart of my soul. I was immediately energised and the walk became graceful and extremely pleasant.

Here was another, fourth favour the driver had gifted me with-

I have learned how to change water into wine!

Bus drivers rule!

LOVE

~LL~