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Author Topic: You might be a redneck dialysis patient if.....  (Read 92112 times)
G-Ma
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« Reply #75 on: August 19, 2008, 03:32:04 PM »

I been wantin to wear them thar bib overalls...
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
GOD IS GOOD
flip
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« Reply #76 on: August 19, 2008, 03:43:51 PM »

It's easy access especially if you don't wear a shirt underneath...even if you have a catheter.
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
twirl
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« Reply #77 on: August 19, 2008, 04:23:59 PM »

you are a redneck dialysis patient
if your name is FlipBob------ the two name thing
if your family reunion is in tents and you have coon sauce water
poor little coons- burns their eyes
but mainly
you are a positive influence on us all
glad you did not ODA after missing Dialysis and probably drinking a little beer and vodka------ a little
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flip
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« Reply #78 on: August 19, 2008, 04:36:52 PM »

today when I went to dialysis I had to sign a ton of paperwork due to the Davita takeover...one of them made me agree not to come to dialysis while intoxicated
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
twirl
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« Reply #79 on: August 19, 2008, 04:41:03 PM »

well hell,
you said that dialysis was a cure for a hangover
what do they expect
demand your rights
now that I think about it    intoxicated may be the best way to go
this somber sh-t is not cuting it
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flip
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« Reply #80 on: August 19, 2008, 05:23:41 PM »

it ain't that bad....I was off for 5 days and pulled off 4.2 kilos today...it was worth it
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
G-Ma
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« Reply #81 on: August 19, 2008, 05:27:53 PM »

and you all wonder why I'm afraid to take a drink...the machine will tell on me.......    :beer1;
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
GOD IS GOOD
kitkatz
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« Reply #82 on: August 19, 2008, 08:57:16 PM »

You do home hemo out of the back of your pickup truck!
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Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

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twirl
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« Reply #83 on: August 20, 2008, 02:16:41 AM »

You do home hemo out of the back of your pickup truck!
so true, I have seen it done :rofl;
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circleNthedrain
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« Reply #84 on: August 20, 2008, 02:30:04 AM »

Hey flip...surely they don't expect you to drive to dialysis sober??!!
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1979 Diagnosed with kidney failure
1979 Right arm fistula
1979 Start hemodialysis
1980 CAPD catheter
1980 Start CAPD
1989 Cadaveric kidney transplant
1995 2nd cadaveric  kidney transplant
2007 Start hemodialysis
2010 Still drawin' wind
flip
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« Reply #85 on: August 20, 2008, 08:31:37 AM »

I expect a lot of changes now that Davita has officially taken over.
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
twirl
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« Reply #86 on: August 20, 2008, 09:24:07 AM »

Davita would rather you come in drunk than late.
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okarol
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« Reply #87 on: September 09, 2008, 09:31:42 PM »


You might be a redneck dialysis patient if...

- You found your Lazy Boy Lounger abandoned on the side of the road.

- You've considered smuggling moonshine in the 24 hour collection jug.

- You're looking for a way to hook a bug-zapper to your cycler.

- You ever thought about jacking your chair up 2 or 3 feet, "Monster Truck' style.
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
flip
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« Reply #88 on: September 09, 2008, 09:44:49 PM »

If you do home dialysis on the front porch.
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
G-Ma
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« Reply #89 on: September 10, 2008, 06:52:15 AM »

My daughter in law was thinking about hanging dialysate bags from the ceiling fans to get them off the floor...........   :rofl;
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Lost vision due to retinopathy 12/2005, 30 Laser Surg 2006
ESRD diagnosed 12/2006
03/2007 Fantastic Eye Surgeon in ND got my sight back and implanted lenses in both eyes, great distance & low reading.
Gortex 4/07.  Started dialysis in ND 5/4/2007
Gortex clotted off Thanksgiving Week of 2007, was unclotted and promptly clotted off 1/2 hour later so Permacath Rt chest.
3/2008 move to NC to be close to children.
2 Step fistula, 05/08-elevated 06/08, using mid August.
Aug 5, 08, trained NxStage and Home on 9/3/2008.
Fistulagram 09/2008. In hospital 10/30/08, Bowel Obstruction.
Back to RAI-Latrobe In Center. No home hemo at this time.
GOD IS GOOD
Joe Paul
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« Reply #90 on: September 10, 2008, 10:12:40 AM »

My daughter in law was thinking about hanging dialysate bags from the ceiling fans to get them off the floor...........   :rofl;
You'd have to run in a circle pretty quickly to keep up  :rofl;
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"The history of discovery is completed by those who don't follow rules"
Angels are with us, but don't take GOD for granted
Transplant Jan. 8, 2010
flip
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« Reply #91 on: September 10, 2008, 10:54:07 AM »

I actually do use a 24 hr. collection jug for my chain saw gas.
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
twirl
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« Reply #92 on: September 10, 2008, 11:36:59 AM »

flipbob---you in the red cap
sluff -- in the blue cap ???
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Wallyz
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« Reply #93 on: September 10, 2008, 02:42:34 PM »

If you refuse to set your Fractional Flow to 24, simply because you hate Jeff Gordon.
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okarol
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« Reply #94 on: September 10, 2008, 03:55:35 PM »


You're pissed because spinner rims aren't available for recliners.
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
twirl
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« Reply #95 on: September 10, 2008, 03:59:50 PM »

O'karol - you must be a red neck at heart
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flip
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« Reply #96 on: September 10, 2008, 04:03:56 PM »

dry weight is what you weigh when you're sober.....drunk weight is much higher
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That which does not kill me only makes me stronger - Neitzsche
twirl
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« Reply #97 on: September 10, 2008, 04:05:57 PM »

Flip :2thumbsup;

you request a kidney transplant from your favorite huntin' dog
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Wallyz
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« Reply #98 on: September 11, 2008, 05:51:10 AM »

Your doctor says you will have to decide between two matching potential donors,  your wife or your cousin, and you just grin and say: "Problem solved!"
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twirl
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« Reply #99 on: September 11, 2008, 07:36:49 AM »

Wallyz    I was going to ask who did he chose his wife or his cousin------- now I get it :rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :rofl; :rofl;
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