Welcome, DayaraLee! By lurking you've got a bit of a head start on things. Good job! You're at the right place! I completely understand how you feel. My husband also has diabetes (insulin dependent) and prolonged high BP was basically what caused him to go from Stage 4 ESRD to Stage 5 and dialysis. He still has to take BP meds but feels better since starting dialysis and able to still work fulltime. We do home-hemo using the NxStage cycler 5x week. This method helps to keep his fluid under control more often than the 3x week in-center method. Maybe this is something you guys can look into. Altho offered to him, my husband didn't want to do PD because of the sugary substance used and he didn't want to mess with a catheter in his belly and risk infection because as you probably know, diabetics are slow to heal. Good luck to you, try to stay strong and when you feel the need, come here and let it out and tell us what is going on.
Welcome to the site. I read your introduction and I saw as almost every one does you worry about the numbers. My advise is to forget the numbers, modify his diet, (see a renal dietician ), let the nephrologist worry about the labs. Why, if he has his high blood pressure and his diabetes under control he may have stopped the disease progression. I personally had elevated creating for 20 years before I started dialysis. Two, the best way to determine when to start is how he feels, if feels he feels good the numbers are meaningless, some people are deathly ill with the same level of someone who feels bad. So to sum up live your life, let the doctor worry. I am not suggesting hiding your head in the sand. But don't ruin your life waiting for something to happen which may or may not occur. I know one women who had a fistula installed 7 years ago and is still not on dialysis.
Stalling the progression of the desease is the best thing you two can do. The very first thing is to get absolutely religious about taking all ordered medication. When I was taking pills straight out of the bottle I didn't do well. Once I received one of those week-at-a-time 4 times a day pill boxes, I rarely ever miss a dose.
Your husband has youth on his side, but he will need to wake up enough to cooperate with the very few changes that neprology offers to slow the progression of the disease, e.g. small changes in diet, managing sugar and BP.Your challenge, as you know, is getting your husband on the same page so he can take as much responsibility as possible for the progression of his CKD.
It's not mothering, pre and post dialysis diets are dramatically different. The changes I made gave me 2 years of reprieve from dialysis. The simple fact is that many things ( Advil for one) that can cause additional damage. The diet not only effects him it effects you to. In addition he is not the only one who will suffer in dialysis you both will. I know he wants to ignore this but planning a renal freindly diet will extend the time he has dialysis free. Stay of for several years and the new development work on alternative treatment will be on line. Listen dialysis is not the worst thing that's happened to me but the truth is it dominates my life. Explain that you want to enjoy a few more years of life free from the 600 pound gorilla that is dialysis.