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Charlie B53
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« on: March 22, 2016, 07:09:44 AM »

Resentment has bothered me for a very long time.  I know this now and feel a need to share this with you as I am sure that many of you also feel Resentment as well.  Maybe not to the intensity that I once did, but still, it is not a healthy thing for us to carry.

Resentment is a normal human emotion that can vary in intensity from a minor irritation to an all out enraged 'I will punch you right in the face' anger. Sometimes even as much as  'I will kill you!'.  If varies with each person and each incident, whether a real, or imagined slight, accidental or intentional.

Resentment can have an effect on our health, tensioning muscles, driving up our blood pressure, causing headaches.  In some cases actually causing heart attacks or strokes.

Resentment is not a good thing.  I am not aware of any animals that have resentment.  It is a Human emotion.

I don't know much about other Countries.  In many ways I don't doubt there are many similarities in Laws and how Laws are established and enforced.

I believe Resentment responsible for many of the Laws here in the U.S..  Someone is Resentful of something another does, has, or is doing, and starts petitioning the powers that be until a new Law is enacted, making an action a crime and creating a whole new class of criminals that get prosecuted, convicted, and imprisoned.   Some call this Justice.   I don't always agree.

We are supposedly Civilized.  I don't think everyone is.  I am certain that I haven't always.  We are seeing so much crime and violence in the World.  Those persons cannot be 'civilized'.  Infringing upon the Freedoms and Rights of others.

I have to admit that I have my troubles with Resentment, still.  I once was a victim and as a result I felt Resentment very deeply.  So deeply that I bought a handgun, became licensed to carry and always had that weapon at my side, all the time, everywhere I went, for many many years.   I have no doubt that if I had somehow found the persons responsible that I would have shot them dead on the spot.  No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

I don't doubt for a second that level of resentment may have been the beginning of the demise of my kidneys, the stress on my body was that great.  Constantly on guard, actively looking around me, at every person, wondering, is this the one?

That was 40 years ago.  Our Laws have a Statute of Limitations.  If those persons were to come forward today and admit what they had done, the Law would simply tell them to go away, and wouldn't do anything.   Here again, I don't agree.

I am still learning acceptance.  Learning to live with the things I cannot change.  This isn't always easy.  But I am trying.

"Vengeance is mine', sayeth the Lord.  I really am learning to believe this, and trying harder to let go of my Resentment.  It is difficult.  I think I have made serious progress, where once I was ready to immediately kill, that is now buried deeply.  I have put away my gun. But I still have moments I suffer thoughts of cutting off their hand.  Will I ever put this totally behind me?  I am hopeful.

We need to learn to forgive, to Love without reservation, without condemning those that take advantage of us.   We are the civilized ones.

This is the choice I chose to make.   I can only hope that many of you join me.


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kickingandscreaming
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« Reply #1 on: March 22, 2016, 07:38:24 AM »

My mother always instilled in me as a chiled that there was some bigger form of "justice" and that I didn't have to take the law into my own hands.  That that person (who harmed me) would eventually "get theirs" and I didn't have to be the one who did it.  That made an impression on me as a young person.  And I still think it does.  She wasn't a religious person so she wasn't talking about "Divine Justice."  Since that time I have learned about the eastern concept of Karma.  Sort of what goes around comes around.  That eventually we will "pay" for our injuries to others and it might not happen in this lifetime and it might not be in kind.  And the same goes for our goodness.  It will come around also.  I think I have adopted that as my moral compass. 
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« Reply #2 on: March 22, 2016, 09:55:08 AM »

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That that person (who harmed me) would eventually "get theirs"
Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way.
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kickingandscreaming
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« Reply #3 on: March 22, 2016, 11:52:29 AM »

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Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way.

I think it's hard to prove, one way or the other.  Life works in mysterious ways.  There is no telling when or how retribution for one's acts will come. It may not come in this lifetime.  It may not be tit for tat.
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Jean
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« Reply #4 on: March 22, 2016, 01:29:20 PM »

Well said Charlie. I have the same problem altho not as intensely as you do. When I feel I have been wronged, I seriously want revenge. My pastor knows me well and manages to mention " we must forgive and forget" I think it is harder to forget than it is to forget. Sometimes tho, if you are good, God will let you know what bad stuff is happening to the one who hurt you and sometimes he even lets you watch. Chin up old boy!!
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One day at a time, thats all I can do.
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