Things Overheard

[kitkatz]

 
Over heard the other day in medical building as I was walking by:
One guy: Sir, can I get  you a wheelchair?"
Man with two canes: "No thanks I have a female and a male leg. One will not so anything I tell it to do, the other is lazy."



What have you over heard?

[willowtreewren]

That's funny! I love when folks approach their challenges with humor!

 

Aleta

[kitkatz]

Overheard at the San Diego Safari Park:

"Gee that eagle must be old, he's bald."   as we were walking by the Bald Eagle exhibit.

" Ms. Denna, Ms. Denna,student is screaming at the top of her lungs.  "You can see that monkey's butt hole."

At the San Diego Zoo:

Little child running down a path " Let's go see the hippolotamuses."

Seen on a T-shirt: I am good for something. I can be used as a bad example.

[PrimeTimer]

"I gotta poop!" -heard from a little boy at the next table over at a restaurant. Fortunately, we had already finished our dinner.

[Riki]

In 2002, my grandmother had a leg amputated because of poor circulation.  Every year, she goes to a specialist in Halifax.  A couple of years ago, one of my appointments coincided with hers, so my mom took both of us. 

While we were in the waiting room, a man came out.  The woman who was waiting for him stood up and said to him, "well, that didn't take long." 
"No," he said, "it didn't take her long to feel my leg."

Mom and I cracked up.

Many years ago, when I was getting my high school grad pics taken, a woman with two small kids came into the portrait studio.  My guess is that she promised them that if they were good, they'd go to Burger King afterward.  The little boy was acting up, and the mother said that if he didn't settle down, they'd go home.  He looked up at her and said, "but I wanna go to Booger King!"

Again, Mom and I cracked up.

[casper2636]

When I was working my way through college, I was a Day Care Teacher. I taught 2-3 year olds. Along with colors, shapes, numbers, letters, and coordination, came potty training. So, I sat little Danielle and little Patrik on their respective  "potty seats", gave them their books and had them sit for 5 minutes ("you don't have to do anything, but just try"). I turned my back to change a younger child's diaper, when I heard a commotion behind me. Patrik was screaming. I turned. There was Danielle and Patrik (eyes wide as saucers) with Danielle grabbing poor little Patrik's peinis, with a death grip, demanding that "I got gypped, and I want one of these!".

[Simon Dog]

Danielle grabbing poor little Patrik's peinis, with a death grip, demanding that "I got gypped, and I want one of these!".

Did you point to Danielle's nether regions and tell her "as long as you have one of these you get get one of those"?

[Darthvadar]

I used to babysit for a family... Daddy couldn't stand his Mother-In-Law, and she didn't think much of him either... Mutual loathing is a good way of putting it!...

Anyway, I was going to be babysitting one night, and I arrived at the house early... Mother-In-Law was there, and little Fiona who was four at the time came into the Living Room with a red bucket and said "Here Nanny, Kick it... Then Daddy says we'll all be better off"....

From the mouths of babes!...

Darth...

[Rerun]

At my new Bible Study Fellowship group I heard one lady ask another if it was over.  She said "no we have a tea chain.  Long pause  The first lady said what is a "Tea Chain"  The lady again said and little stronger "A TEA CHAIN"  The first lady said "I don't know what a TEA CHAIN is"  Finally the lady obviously from the deep south said "It is Wheere Theyy Teeech mooor ov thee BIIBlle."  Oh a teaching! 

OK I was that first lady!    

[Riki]

OK I was that first lady!   

*LOL*  Confession is good for the soul, Rerun...

[PrimeTimer]

Overheard: My husband laughing at the TV...during his dialysis treatment. Home hemo. It is so very worth it.

[okarol]

Overheard: My husband laughing at the TV...during his dialysis treatment. Home hemo. It is so very worth it.

 

[PrimeTimer]

"I'm so bored, I want to get a part-time job just to have something to do! People die from boredom you know!"   Puleez....wish I had that problem...too much time on my hands...dying from boredom...

[smartcookie]

When I was in grad school, I was in a nursing home meeting with a family. We were in a hallway talking about end of life care when a lady across the hall in her room yells, "Help needed on aisle five!" I giggled a little and the woman looked at me and said,"It is not funny when someone needs help!" I went and apologized and learned that just because someone is sick or confused, it does not mean they don't have feelings.

[kitkatz]

At the aquarium yesterday:  These fish only have one eye.  Sigh.

[Rerun]

At my women's Bible Study group last night a lady brings her Mother whose memory is slipping and we had a side dish of Tuna Casserole.

Mother picks at it with her fork and says "is this cat"? 

I'm glad I didn't bring the Tuna Casserole.

[PrimeTimer]

A hospital nurse asking a patient "Are you the donor or the recipient?"     I said a little prayer when I heard that.

[Michael Murphy]

Laying on the table,nude, awake and waiting for a angioplasty and hearing the surgeon saying and I quote "Uh Oh". Cold embarrassed and now trrorized I had no choice but to wait there.  It turned out more than ok, the surgeon managed to put 6 stents in place in a artery he thought he couldn't stent.  At the end he was running around like he won the Super Bowl showing the before and after X-rays of the procedure, seeing that I finally felt better.

[Darthvadar]

I was on the tram in Dublin... There was a family, parents, a little boy of around seven years old, and a little girl of around four years old sitting opposite the Wheelchair Space, so they were very near to me... The little boy very obviously had Autism... Two Gardaí (Irish Police Officers) got onto the tram and the little boy was facinated with the equipment on their Utility Belts... The two Gardaí were so good with the lad... Told the parents not to worry... The little lad was fine asking questions, and wasn't wasting their time... They were both very tall, and the lad was quite small, so they knelt to speak with him... Showed him how their equipment works, had him have a little chat over the radio with their Sergeant , try on and have his picture taken wearing their Stab Vest, Hi-Vis Vest, and cap... He was loving it....

All of this time, the little girl never said a word.... Just sat there watching, taking everything in... Then one Garda took his handcuffs off the belt, and said to the little boy "Do you know what these are for???"... Before the little boy could reply, the little girl piped up at the top of her voice "My mammy has handcuffs.... Pink fluffy ones!!!"....

Yes, I did lose control and howl with laughter... So did half the people on the tram!!!!....

I needn't tell you, the parents were mortified!!!!....

Darth....

[Deanne]

I think Darthvadar gets the best response award! I can picture the whole scene. 

[Darthvadar]

I think Darthvadar gets the best response award! I can picture the whole scene. 

I couldn't stop laughing.... And of course, the redder the parents turned, the funnier I thought it was!!!... 

Darth....

[PrimeTimer]

       LOL!

[PrimeTimer]

Was in a store the other day when I overheard a man sneezing and telling his friend "Use to never have allergies. Got a new kidney and whatever that other person was allergic to I'm allergic to it now".    Not totally sure but I don't think that happens...of course his friend reminded him that his immune system is compromised.

[smartcookie]

Little girl at my door trick or treating, "We have a dinosaur in the car.  Can he have some candy, too?"   

[PrimeTimer]

Little girl at my door trick or treating, "We have a dinosaur in the car.  Can he have some candy, too?"   

Speaking of dinosaurs...We just moved to a new apartment and aren't familiar with the surroundings yet or our new neighbors. The other morning, when it was still dark out, I went to take out the garbage. Just as I stepped outside something caught my eye over near the neighbors door. It was a giant blow up dinosaur all lit up for Halloween. I saw it and nearly jumped out of my skin. Hopefully no one "overheard" me and the words that came out of my mouth. Scared the crap out of me! Gotta admit tho, that was a pretty good Halloween decoration!