Just a tiny little rant... (sorry, long story!)

[frankswife]

Hello, I just had to vent a little about yesterdays events. Just a bit of backstory: Frank's dad passed away at the end of June, and his house now belongs to us. Frank went over a few times to clean it out/maintain the lawn and both times he had episodes of low blood sugar. So I told him he is absolutely not allowed over there to do any work unless me or one of his sisters is there. So yesterday for the first time in FOREVER I went out with a few girlfriends shopping for the afternoon. When I left, darling hubby was in the yard happily tinkering with his pepper plants. Two hours later I get a phone call that hubby was found unconcious on the ground at his dads house by one of the neighbors and was on his way to the hospital by ambulance. He was weed whacking and his blood sugar dropped to 17. That little @#$% snuck over there while I was gone. I am torn between being angry and wanting to strangle him and feeling guilty for leaving him and going out to have a good time. I dont know what to anymore. Thanks for letting me vent.

[jbeany]

No, you are not allowed to feel guilty for wanting to take care of your own mental health!  He's a grown man, not a child.  He's the one who should have known better.  He's well aware by now that physical exercise drops his blood sugar.  He should be taking a tester, juice, and glucose tabs with him where ever he goes.  He should know enough to stop and check his sugar every 20 minutes or so when he is being physically active.  You should NOT have had to tell him not to go alone in the first place.  He should have had the sense to take care of his health instead of being passive-aggressive about waiting until you left to go over there.  You have every right to be angry! 

[cassandra]

So there.....! I completely agree with Jbeany, and couldn't have said it any better.

good luck Cas

[frankswife]

Thank you guys sooo much. I KNOW you are right. It's been such a struggle with him. I am dreading when he does start dialysis, he is going to be so difficult. I am glad the IHD crew is here to listen. Thanks again,
Donna

[billybags]

frankswife, HE IS A MAN  what do you expect. They some times act like little boys. It was probably a case of "I will do what I want, when I want to do it" they can be such ars*s. But we still love them. Hope he is alright.

[bevvy5]

Yep, it's the "You're not the boss of me,"  syndrome.  We've had our grandsons, three and seven, this week and although the behaviour is similar, it's not cute in a grown man. 

[deniferfer]

As the others have said don't feel bad and you should be angry .. you are his wife not his babysitter.. he should have known better then to push himself to the point of passing out.

[gothiclovemonkey]

Yep, it's the "You're not the boss of me,"  syndrome.  We've had our grandsons, three and seven, this week and although the behaviour is similar, it's not cute in a grown man.

most men have this problem! lol
Id be mad too!!!

[Jean]

Maybe this latest deal will wake him up enough to stop pulling the die-hard business. Once you have gotten done pounding on him, give him a slap upside his head for me.!!!

[amanda100wilson]

from his perspective too, you are his wife, not babysitter, and he is entitled to'make his own mistakes, misguided though they may be.  is he considered to be an unstable diabetic or has anyone considers this?  from his point of view, this must be really frustrating and maybe he is trying to push 'being normal' too much.  if this is an issue, have you ever considered looking into getting one of those helper dogs that alert to this sort of thing?

[Poppylicious]

I can't really add to what anybody else has already said, but wanted to send you lots of virtual *huggles*.

However, DON'T let this put you off having some Me-Time again.  Just make sure he PROMISES not to do anything which will mean you having to cut short your plans before you go out again! What a rascal!  Hope he's okay now and you've finished strangling him ...

 

[boswife]

ohhhhhhh LORDY LORDY LORDY!!  im almost in tears laughing, and sobbing at the same time...  THEY can be awful even the best of them!!  I sometimes want to put tape over MY mouth just so i quit telling him,"watch your step, do you really want to eat that, you'ld better sit down, lets try to walk a bit today...etc etc etc..."   I dont know when all this takes over, but i know we have to watch ourselves so they mabie take over a bit of that responsibility theirselves..  It's Sooo hard and i know that guilt of feeling it's your fault, but really, we all need to take that guilt and toss it.  We do our best, and lord forbid we even try to do something to relieve the stress of it all, and boom, it's right back in our lap......... or in our aching hearts..  Im so sorry that you had to hurt and fear, and thank God for these wonderful people here to help set us strait...  Sending love comfort, and understanding...     boswife

[billybags]

Boswife you are so right. I feel like my life is spiraling out of control.  Like you I am always saying "don't do this, do this, don't eat that ,eat this. I feel like I know more than the Doctors. I get so frustrated. One minute things are not too bad then you close your eyes and things have turned. I wake up in a morning and say " LET THE STRESS BEGIN" and it normally does. Such is life.  I hate being a carer.

[Grumpy-1]

OK ladies I've got to jump in on this (can't resist).  In defense of us guys.  He feels he needs to keep up the property.  Yes, he (and most guys) do stupid things once (ok maybe we don't learn quick and make the same mistake more than once)  BUT come ladies, admit you need us around.  Even if it only for laughs here on the site.  So Frankswife, after you knock some sense into him give him a big kiss and hug.  Grumpy

[jbeany]

Actually, Grumpy, I don't need mine around and I don't want another one either!  So watch your step!