alchemist first of all
to the site. I don't really know how to answer you, you sound so negative and depressed. OK you have got a crappy deal, we all have who are on dialysis and have different health issues. You have to try and focus and be positive about this. May be you need to see a canceler or talk to some one about all of this. It is not a picnic in the park, there is lots of help out there, look for it. Please keep coming back and talking to us.