Can't keep it all in anymore.

Thanks for checking in. Certainly hope it eases up for you. We certainly understand the stresses you are under! This Disease has ripped at the "Heart" of everyone envolved with it, whether you have it or not! I know it has destroyed my husbands livelihood. He will never be the same ole man he use to be. His remaining days will be tied to a machine in order to live. He knows that and I know that and "WE" are at peace with it!

My best suggestion to you, is to love him, be there for him, and give yourself a break from it! You will feel somewhat better, and will be more able to take on his disease with more purpose driven determination!!! He did not ask for this and you did not either! But if he is the one for you, then you must do your best to make him "happy". Being there for him will be a tremendous help, believe me! They can turn "depressed" on a dime because of their lives as they see it. We have to try and make it better for them.

My husband is a wonderful man and we will be celebrating our 18th anniv in 6mths. We have had a wonderful life, I would not change it for the world. He has and probably will stop D. one day, but until that day comes and he is serious about it, then I will accept his wishes, but for now, I gonna try to make it as good as possible for him! (He hasn't mentioned it in awhile, so I must be doing pretty good, huh?). No one ever wants a person to give up,but Im selfish too! And I am not in his shoes and have just a glimse of what he is going through.

But I do know this, that I love him unconditionally, and I will fight to keep him here! Just keep your head, Alewis! Take it moment by moment and try not to stress so much! Take it easy, because whatever may happen to your wonderful BF, he will always have you to fall on! You are his Rock!

God Bless you both! I know this is overwhelming, but hang tough girl, you can do this! It can get more routine for you.

lmunchkin