Hurt feeling

[Ladybag]

I walked in the back today at work and one of the ladies came up rubbed my belly and asked if I was pregnant. That really hurt my feelings I understand there is a puge in my belly but I can't help it. I know this might be a dumb think to be upset over but I am really sensitive with the way I look.

[willowtreewren]

 

I hope you put her straight about her mistake.....

 

Aleta

[lmunchkin]

Hey, Ladybag, she's just jealous! That's her problem right?

[Willis]

Consider that she was happy for you and likely not trying to hurt your feelings about your appearance. Unless you have reason to think otherwise I'd recommend trying to be gracious with a sense of humor and give her the benefit of the doubt. In the future, it may help if you just realize that this is something that's likely to happen because people are people and sometimes they just make dumb assumptions.

My wife has always been overweight and when she was younger this happened to her a few times and it certainly hurt her feelings. But how could she respond? "Oh, I'm just fat--glad you noticed!"? In your case this could give you a chance to explain your PD and make both of you feel better about the mistake. I'd bet that she was more embarrassed over her erroneous assumption that you are pregnant than you were. My experience is that people who find out what I'm going through with ESRF are usually quite sympathetic.

Now on the other hand, she might just be a jerk in which case you have every right to just tell her to #@$! off! 
 

[gothiclovemonkey]

oh my, i have had this happen on a number of occations....
the best would probably have to be when I was at the theater, a woman said Oh my how far long are you? I said uh im not pregnant... her response..... "Oh, u must just eat alot huh??" my jaw dropped.... wow

Of course, some of the times, it may have something to do with my family thinking im too fat for normal little girls clothes, so at around the age of 8 they began dressing me in maternity clothing. I always wondered why my night gowns had holes in the breast area.... (i did have a bulging belly, since i had a 25 lb tumor in there)

[texasstyle]

Next time you see her, rub her butt and ask if she's pregnant. That'll fix her! lol

[gothiclovemonkey]

ROFL
or... u could just tell her u must be using the same soap she uses on her @ss ...

[MooseMom]

ROFL
or... u could just tell her u must be using the same soap she uses on her @ss ...

Oh pleeeeeease do this!

[RichardMEL]

I can beat the lot of you!!

A few weeks ago the (female, if it matters) director of my department came up to me, poked at my belly and said "You've got a baby bulge!!" - she's lucky I didn't go all hulk with roid rage at that one!! 

[gothiclovemonkey]

RM, where u wearing heals and lipstick at the time?? hehehe

[RichardMEL]

RM, where u wearing heals and lipstick at the time?? hehehe

Only in the privacy of my home and.... certain select clubs 

[YLGuy]

So RM...when are you due? 

[texasstyle]

Oh geez Richard, you sure do "take on for the team" a lot  lol. We love you for that! Yeah, when are you due? hee

[Brightsky69]

At work on Friday my boss asked if I was alright....and that i looked pale. A few minutes after that I got a call from my transplant clinic saying my creatinine was looking good and my prograf level was excellent.
I think he is trying to make me look bad. 

[KICKSTART]

RM ..i think i know that club ! 

[willowtreewren]

At work on Friday my boss asked if I was alright....and that i looked pale. A few minutes after that I got a call from my transplant clinic saying my creatinine was looking good and my prograf level was excellent.
I think he is trying to make me look bad. 

You could tell him that your busy schedule at work has kept you from making the last few tanning appointments! 

But isn't that great news about your creatinine? 

[Brightsky69]

    

[okarol]

At work on Friday my boss asked if I was alright....and that i looked pale. A few minutes after that I got a call from my transplant clinic saying my creatinine was looking good and my prograf level was excellent.
I think he is trying to make me look bad. 

"Gee Boss, I felt great until you said that. Thanks."
Congrats on the good clinic report!

[Brightsky69]

I had a co-worker tell another co-worker (a friend of mine) that I really should go out on disability. This was after my transplant.
Of course this bitchy co-worker is a "pet" of my boss. They are really starting to show their true colors.

[onestronglittlelady]

It amazes me how people can be so rude. It makes me thankful for the nice people in my life.

[casper2636]

As Blanche DuBois said in the "The Street Car Named Desire"--- "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers"

[billmoria]

I have been big (read FAT) all my life. I was a school teacher and I had to deal with comments for 31 years. I often said: "I'd rather be fat above my belt than between my ears!"
 

[RightSide]

Next time you see her, rub her butt and ask if she's pregnant. That'll fix her! lol

Nah.

Next time you see her, act very sympathetic and ask her how long she's been suffering from Alzheimer's, the poor dear.

[jojosmommy]

I can certainly sympathize!  I have PKD, and the extreme large size of my cysts does actually make me look pregnant... very pregnant.  I could easily wear maternity clothes and would probably be more comfortable, but I refuse.  I have people comment on my "pregnancy"  all the time.  I even had a patient at D ask me when I'm due! Crazy! Then recently, at a funeral I saw a family member that I hadn't seen in a long time.  She came up to me, put both hands on my belly and announced loudly "when did this happen? I didn't know you were pregnant!"  It was a little humiliating for me, but much more for her, when I removed her hands and said I'm not pregnant, it's just my kidneys.  Everyone around us was a little uncomfortable, and began to change the subject!  Just hit them with the truth, and they will feel bad that they even said anything at all!  Hang in there, and don't let it get you down!

Oh and by the way... I'm considering the date that I can get my cystic kidney's removed to be my "due" date!  When I get a new kidney, I plan on having a "birthday" party just as if it were the birth of a child.  Hey, I've listened to the comments and carried these suckers around long enough, I think I deserve it! 

[CHeatherS]

You know, this has been a subject for some time on the PKD forum.  It's quite common.  I was even telling my dialysis nurse about it, and she said she personally has made that mistake and felt SO BAD about it.   I guess that the main thing is that we have to really come to terms with it ourselves.  Until we go through it, we just don't "get it"..... but we sure can try hard to inform people, as well as tell them how bad it makes us feel...      

I thought that one of my best assets was my flat, six pack tummy.  In just a matter of a year or two, that's gone, and especially now that I have just started PD.  I didn't think I was so vain, but I went to Hawaii just before I went on dialysis, and I really was self conscious about my tummy.  At least in Alaska you can cover with all the layers of clothing....    So, basically, I am saying, "I hear you friend".

Heather