visited a Dialysis center today

[RichardMEL]

Sorry by "little" needles I meant like the tiny ones they use to take blood tests etc.

And yeah the whole needle in the eye thing when I was seven was pretty freak out time for me too - trust me!!!!

As for D needles - I wsas on 15 guage for most of my D time, and yeah not fun to watch - that'why I didn't. I looked away, thought about something else, distracted myself by trying to tell a joke or whatever. Like I wrote earlier I know it's not as simple as that for you with your phobia but well that's how I coped.

[KICKSTART]

Im not saying your fear isnt real or bad. I would still like to know how they put your cath in without using any needles though ?

[needlephobic]

Im not saying your fear isnt real or bad. I would still like to know how they put your cath in without using any needles though ?

Ok at the time I got this chest cath in I was very sick to pooped to fight and as my primary Doc said I should have been pushing up daisyes. If I wasn't sick and pooped out yes i would have fought them tooth and nail over them needles. Had cateracts done and had a nurse holding my hand and when the other nurse stuck me I took a swing at her and even tried kicking her but after that they drugged me up but I am still scared of them things don't want anything to do with them. My phobia is real people like me who are afraid of needle will not go to doctors office or have anything to do will needles we would rather die than get stuck google it up sometime 

[KICKSTART]

You sill think im saying its not real , when all i am doing is asking you questions ! So you have had needles put in you before !!!! You must realise its not going to kill you and know what the pain is like. I hate to sound harsh but sooner or later it may be a case of needles or die . Its seems like a lot of people have tried to help you , but you wont help yourself. Give these people a chance instead of just saying no. I have a morbid dread of spiders , i cant be in the same room as one, but i cant hold a house spider never mind a tarantula , yet you are not bothered about sewing needles. I keep trying to offer solutions here in small baby steps , but you dont really want to know .

[needlephobic]

You sill think im saying its not real , when all i am doing is asking you questions ! So you have had needles put in you before !!!! You must realise its not going to kill you and know what the pain is like. I hate to sound harsh but sooner or later it may be a case of needles or die . Its seems like a lot of people have tried to help you , but you wont help yourself. Give these people a chance instead of just saying no. I have a morbid dread of spiders , i cant be in the same room as one, but i cant hold a house spider never mind a tarantula , yet you are not bothered about sewing needles. I keep trying to offer solutions here in small baby steps , but you dont really want to know .

Sorry if I offended you. Yes been stuck with needles also sometime in my childhood years I was traumatized by some nurse or whoever stuck me with a needle. Yes I can't stand the pain of a needle. All my teen and adult years I avoided needles at all cost refused to have the flu shots every year I am really scared of them needles it is hard to explain. You say you are afraid of spiders and can't be in the same room with one. If you had a spider on your lap how you you feel? Better yet have a person come at you with a spider would you be wanting to get out of there? As of people helping me out here yes they have Monday I am going to call a number a member gave me on one of the post. Around here help is hard to find have contacted therapist and been told alot of times I don't know how to help with your phobia but can help me on my other issues. I also have trust issues when you been traumatized it is hard to trust people. At my D center there is a tech that has messed up 4 fistulas sorry she is not sticking me can't trust her the ones I start trusting get layed off or quite. So in order to get help for me is up in the city hard to do when you have no car but I got that prob under control for time being.   

[Lillupie]

Is visual impairment the reason you need a partner?  If yes, then there is no need to address the other issues.

I may have asked this before, but cannot recall. Why don't you do PD and save yourself from dealing with needles?

Was told I would need a partner. I don't have room for the supplies and the machine. And thanks to my greedy Bros and Sister I have no clue to where I am going to be in mid summer or at the end of the year when they kick me out of my mom's house and sell it because they have no clue as to what I am going through right now and can care less all they want is money money money since my parents died. Housing here is on freeze and there is a wait of up to a year if it wasn't on freeze. Plus I would have to go and have blood work done which requires a needle (((shivers))). So I am dead man walking if I can't find help to over come my fear. I am shaking now as I type  this .

no can see just fine They told me when I was at the center learning about it that I will need a partner. I also have down under medical probs too and when I was working since I lift heavy things they were worried about it giving me hernias plus I worked in a mental hospital and was worried patients would grab it when they through a fit and they was worried about infections where I worked at so it was out of the question. I thought maybe I could handle needles but still can't looking for a therapist but not many deal with my phobia

OK, this helps a lot.  Since you have no visual problems, what are the medical/physical problems you were told wouldn't allow you to do PD?

What exactly do you do at work?  As far as having to lift things  - how heavy?  Are you a group home worker?  Can you work something out with your supervisor for different responsibilities? 

How would the patients in the mental hospital know you are on CAPD unless you say something?  There are undergarments FOR MEN who are on CAPD that help keep the tubing more secure. 

As far as doing a couple of fluid exchanges at work, those could be done while at lunch and on a break in an employee restroom.  Have with you at work a bag with CAPD supplies and disinfectate/wipes to have a clean working area in the restroom.  Good technique should address the possible infection issues.

As for your fear of needles - Have you contacted the Mental Health Division of the OU Medical Center in Oklahoma City to see if they can refer you to a program that deals with your phobia?  Call them for a consult.  405.271.5251 ext.47643

Whether you are on hemo or PD, you will have to have monthly bloodwork drawn.  How about taking xanax or antivan before going in to take some of the edge off?

I'm not really going to address your family dynamics, except to say that since your parents are deceased, didn't they leave in the will plans for you and your siblings to be taken care of?  Wouldn't all three of you have to agree to sell the house?  If so, then wouldn't you get a third of the proceeds?  I have more questions, but feel they would be too invasive.

In the meantime, you mentioned nothing was going to be happening until mid summer.  Plenty of time for you to go ahead an get established at home for CAPD.   And, when the house does sell, put a plan be into effect.  If you get an apartment, it should be large enough to handle a month's worth of supplies.  If it is too small, then ask a good friend or neighbor if you could store some product with them.

Hope some of this strikes a chord and you will follow up.

Ok I already have 2 groin hernias and a detached bladder in which the bladder said was a saggy bladder grrrrrrrrrr.
As for the job they let me go could not form the function of the job they say. One reason I was housekeeper and they have the chairs that are full of sand the weight is about 200 to 300 pounds they have theses wooden low beds which took about 3 people to lift. and do to fistula that was out and they told me they had no light duty jobs and let me go. They were worried about the patients  grabbing my chest cath when they blow up there is always a fight going there or a employee getting caught up in a fight. I had a guy come at me twice so it is a dangerous job. and if I did have the PD cath they wouldn't let me work cause of it. and at work don't think you could do a exchange in 15 min on break not sure about a 30 min lunch got to eat you know and they would complain I was doing that at work. Thanks for the number I'll give them a call. At D they take my lab out of my cath so no prob there. And with the Bros and sis the idea was for me to stay put but my sis got to talk with my greedy bro and his girlfriend and talked her into selling the house. they are so greedy they are looking into changing the zone so a business will buy the house and land. I asked my sis about that and I was threaten about them taking me to court to get me kicked out. As of right now bro's girlfriend is painting the walls of the house to get it ready  to be sold. As for me they can careless they don't check on me there are days I feel like crap. One day my bros girlfriend came in and wanted to see how I was doing in her own words I have not seen you in 3 days and she lives here. I could die and they won't find me for over 3 days pretty sad. And finding a apartment with the disability I make wood take almost all of it for rent  so I don't know what I am going to do. Just wish they would walk in my shoes a week or too to see how I feel.

I wanted to add my  in here. If you get an apartment, they might be able to deliever your supplies 2 times a month instead of once a month. You wont have to have a months worth of supplies at one time, just two weeks. This is what I do and have a house. Just not a lot of room. As for a hernia, I have had two hernia repair surgeries myself, and they use the lowest amount they can get away with so you are getting the right amount of dialysis. If there is a will there is a way. I love PD. I have had my  moments with both dialysis. Let me tell you I would not trade PD for anything. I dont like needles either. When I go in for my labs they use the smallest needle that any hospital or doctors office would use. That permacath is bad, bad news. They get infected so much. I actually heard a story about a lady who had that and they had to do open heart surgery because the infection went to her heart!
 Now, your job sucks. No way around it. Since you are working, if youleft work, you might get some disability. Just a thought. Or get a differnet job, maybe one less demanding.

Keep us posted, or rather me. Just trying to catch up.

Lisa