If there is a god

[KICKSTART]

Please let him be with me tomorrow.  Im sat here scared and alone and going out of my mind. Monday night i got a bit of stomach ache , so mentioned it at dialysis yesterday. To cut along story short they did a pd exchange on me and ran the sample through urgent. My pd cath is still in. It came back ive got a massive infection but they dont know what yet. They gave me emergency IV antibiotics and gave me tablets to bring home. Then today i had to go to the other hospital (the crap one) to see the doctor. I understood my tube had to come out and so arranged to get my mum here to sit with the dogs for a while , because i was told you went in to have it removed am and got home pm. Anyway this urgent appt , had to wait as when i got to hospital the doctor was on his lunch break ! So after waiting for an hour i finally saw him and he has terrified me. His words were 'tube out or its stairway to heaven ', im so upset , im so scared, im so lonely. You all know me ,so my first priority is my dogs  so i ve got my mum looking after them , i just dont care about me anymore , i dont think i can take anymore , but i cant leave my babies , i feel like im in hell. They are going to operate on me tomorrow under a general and have to get all the infection out. He wont say what my chances are because they dont know what infection it is. At best he says im going to be in a week and at worst ...well. Please pray for me , i wanted to make this post , i just hope its not my last.
Thankyou to everyone whose been there for me , i love you all. a very frightened KS xxx

[okarol]

KS - we are here for you and I hope all goes well. I am sorry about this, it sounds very scary but hopefully they'll take good care of you. 

[paul.karen]

Im sorry but so many of your doctors seem so careless and heartless.  I mean really take it out or die??
I ques the good news is you know what is causing you pain and they are going to fix it.

I will pray for you to get well fast.
And dont worry you will be here to take care of your pups for a LONG long time KS.
It is the sad doctors that put so much fair into you for no good reason.  No wonder your a bag of nerves.  No fault of yours but the fault of your doctors IMO.  What BAD bedside manners this doctor has.

See you very soon.
P&K

[paris]

Surrounding you with so many prayers and good thoughts.              So very sorry you are going through so much.  It is scary.  I wish your doctors had more compassion.   We love you and will be waiting for your next post.   

[billybags]

Ok, It sounds like the doctor was frightening you and that is not good. Yes, you need to have your tube out, they will give your peritoneal a good rinse to clean it out. When Alan had e-coli they had to try 3 different antibiotics to get one that worked. it did take more than a week. Yes, you will be ill, but stop thinking about seeing your God yet. He is not frigging ready for YOU yet. I think you would give him a bloody headache (only joking KS) Do they know what has caused the peritonitis yet? Its nice your mum is there with you, at least you can relax a little and not worry to much about the dogs. KS please stay positive, we are all thinking about you, you will get through this.Hugs and kisses. Shit you may have to give up smoking for a week.

[Darthvadar]

KS....

I wish you the VERY best of luck with this!.... That doctor was a thoughtless £$%&!!!....

Your babies are in good hands with your mum... You just look after YOURSELF now!... It WON'T be your last post... You're made of stronger stuff than that, as we've all been witness to recently!...

Take care my friend.... Keep the faith.... Know that I and everyone on the site are here, thinking of you....

May God bless and protect you!.....

Darth...

[lizabee]

What an a$$ that Dr. is! I honestly don't think they really think before they speak.  Many positive thoughts and prayers coming your way. I will add you to the pray list at my church this Sunday, their prayers are very strong!  Best of luck to you!

[Restorer]

From all I've seen you write about your doctors, they all seem to be so melodramatic. If I were a doctor, I would never tell someone "tube out or die." I might say something like, "get this treated or risk dying" but only if they were refusing to get treated at all. I had peritonitis that wasn't treated properly, and came back three times after the first time, but no one ever told me I was in big trouble or even needed to have my cath out.

Since you're no longer on PD, maybe it's best to have your catheter taken out. I hope the antibiotics they prescribe work for you. I don't know how they've concluded it's a "massive infection" if they don't even know what bug it is.

[KICKSTART]

Sat here , bags packed , off at 5am ,the cruel sods have rung me up and said they want me to do 4 hours of dialysis before i go down to theatre. They are not saying its Peritonitis , just i have a massive white blood count and till they open me up they dont know whats going on in there. Maybe the doctor did terrify me to make sure i wouldnt back out. I wouldnt have done anyway , i was quite prepared to have my tube out. The only problem i have is my mum can only stay till monday , because then my brother goes in for an operation so she needs to get home for her dogs. I think part of my sadness is , if they keep me in for a while i will have no visitors , silly isnt it ? My head is all over the place tonight , even though ive been given this news im sat here in no pain, no vomiting, not even a temprature , it doesnt add up. Ive been busy all night preparing for tomorrow. Surely they would know if it was peritonitis ? Or do they just say to everyone you have massive infection ? It doesnt add up , but my god im a scared. Hoping im back soon. KS x

[Maker]

KS, I'm so sorry this is happening to you    I just said a prayer for you that God will guide the Dr.s who are treating you and that you will have a total healing and be back with your precious dogs very very soon!  I understand your love for your dogs, I feel the same about my kitties.  We will all be anxiously waiting to hear good news from you!!

[CCStan]

KS, Our prayers are with you.  Remember you really are not alone.  Anyone of us would watch your puppies(your babies) unfortunately we are so seperated by many miles.  Think of the many visiitors you will have,albeit in spirit.  Let us all know when you are up and running again.  GET WELL SOON!!

[RightSide]

I wish you all the very best.

You'll be in my thoughts.  Please keep us posted.

I know from your other posts that you're a fighter.  You don't take things lying down.  And studies have shown that it's patients like you who have the best treatment outcomes.  I'm confident that will be the case with you again this time!

BTW:  This is why I couldn't choose PD.  I am allergic to two big classes of antibiotics--the penicillins and the cephalosporins, as well as a possible allergy to Clindamycin.  If I get a life-threatening infection, there aren't a lot of antibiotics left they could try on me.  So I want to live free of any and all catheters.

[Slywalker]

KS - good luck.      I'm sure everything will be fine.   I really can't believe what a jerk your doctor seems to be.

We're all sending you postive energy!!!!!!

 

[looneytunes]

KS, it's ok to be scared.  Just know that we are all praying for you. Though we can't be with you physically, we are in spirit.   I'm looking forward to seeing a post from you soon saying that all is well.   

[Rerun]

KS I'll be praying for you, but you are right.... not feeling sick and no temp...  that doesn't seem like a massive infection to me.  Don't panic.  Just get the tube out.           

                                                                 

[glitter]

I will be thinking of you- please get well and come back to us. 

[calypso]

I hope everything turns out ok Kickstart. One thing I don't understand is how you got peritonitis if you weren't using the catheter or doing any exchanges? You said you were off PD right?

[boswife]

Hi kickstart, i just this second got to be a member here (as a caregiver actually) and did so because of just today reading your post..  I just had to come on and wish you well tomorrow, and send prayers of peace and healing and prayers for your drs tomorrow to work with Gods guidence.  Sending hugs of comfort too, and wish i was close to care for your dogs.. Even hubby agreed with that one!!  Please keep in touch.. We'll be waiting to hear from you.  Gods blessings with you, boswife, (who will be introducing myself probably tomorrow when i have some energy)..

[Poppylicious]

Oh KS, I'm thinking of you.  If I knew where in the UK you were I would do my utmost to visit you/find some way of letting you know I'm thinking of you.  I hope that everything goes as smoothly as it possibly can and that the doctors are a tad more compassionate with you. 

*waggles angry fingers at doctor for being such an idiot*

*hugs* x

[dwcrawford]

Wishing you the very best!

[Ken Shelmerdine]

Kickstart I'm thinking of you and hope you make a full recovery.

[Hanify]

Are any of the British people on IHD anywhere near Kickstart?  Is there anyone who could give a hand with the dogs and/or visit Kickstart?

[kitkatz]

I hope everything goes okay and you get better quickly.

[Marsh]

Keeping you in my thoughts!

[Stoday]

Are any of the British people on IHD anywhere near Kickstart?  Is there anyone who could give a hand with the dogs and/or visit Kickstart?

Have you any idea whereabouts in the UK she lives? Unlike yours, her profile locates her only as "UK".