introducing...me

[granddaughter]

I am the 27 year old granddaughter of a 90 year old female, who has stage 5 kidney disease. Her gfr is 10 (tested a couple of weeks ago). I am not the primary caregiver of my grandmother, I am in another state, my mother, uncles and aunt rotate that duty.  My grandmother declined dialysis about 3 maybe 4 years ago. So far she has been doing well, however my mother says she is noticing some changes in her. I have two kids of my own and my spouse is active duty military. For several reasons I cannot just pick up and move back home, although I really want to just put my life on hold to be with my grandmother for however much longer. I  found this site by searching for info on what to expect during the final stages of this disease. I understand everyone is not the same and know not to expect this to go by the book. Some insight into this would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for allowing me access into your world.

[sico]

  G'day granddaughter, i haven't been here long. Sorry to hear about your grandmother.
There is information on here about what happens when you refuse dialysis. I think you get real sleepy.

[Romona]

 

[willieandwinnie]

  granddaughter. Hope wonderful of you to find information about your grandmother's health. You will find all sorts of information and support here and we will be happy to answer any questions you have. Please keep us posted and Bless your husband's heart for serving in the military. 

[monrein]

  

[Rerun]

Welcome to IHD.  One thing you need to understand is that you would not want to put your 90 year old grandmother through access surgery and dialysis and the food and fluid restrictions.  I know I would not want to put my grandmother through it.  When your kidneys shut down your toxins raise and you just don't wake up.  There may be some fluid retention. 

I'm sure this is a really hard time but call often and tell her that you love her.   

God Bless and be with.

[jessup]

G'day and  mate
My heartfelt love to you and your family
It can be a dilema for family to "sit back" and respect their loved ones decisions
My father has only recently passed away aged 72
It was heart breaking to see his "struggles" and his fight for life over the past 2 years
But of course his situation is somewhat different to your gran
Please stay strong and talk often to her
Enjoy the love you have for each other
Lots of wishes to you all
This site has been a godsend to me and my family and it will be for you and your family
Search often, post often
Cheers

[willowtreewren]

 

And Hugs to you.

 

[granddaughter]

 

[Melissa]

Hello,
I am sorry to hear about your grandmother.
My father was in stage 5 failure for a year or two, he also declined dialysis, and once my mother started noticing changes - more weakness, loss of appetite, confusion - in him he actually failed pretty quickly, within a couple of weeks he had passed away.  I hope this is not too scary or hurtful, but that was my experience.  I was able to see my father just before he died and it was the best thing I did - I have that sense of peace, you know? 
Keep getting the updates from your Mom, and I think you will know when it is time to make that trip.  I am sure it would mean the world to her too.  Good luck with everything, I hope it goes ok.

[peleroja]

I can't give you any insight, but I can at least welcome you to the group.  I sincerely hope you find the answers you need.  Best of luck to you.

[Bajanne]

Welcome to our wonderfully caring and sharing community.  I am so sorry to hear about your grandmother.  My dad passed away at 89 from kidney failure (he did not refuse, but was not given dialysis) He did not seem to be in pain, but stopped communicating with us.  He would have little moments of lucidity (like when someone from another island visited him, or a grandbaby was brought to see him), but was mainly silent (and he was a talkative man - retired principal of a high school, retired minister of the gospel!) The best thing as someone said, is to talk with her, let her know that you care.




Bajanne, Moderator

[Maxridex]

Welcome. Wow your grandmother can see her great grandson ! that's very special.