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Author Topic: College for my daughter  (Read 4923 times)
okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« on: March 28, 2009, 03:31:50 PM »

Jenna's younger sister Becca has been waiting to hear from schools - its tough on these kids as they worry about being accepted or rejected. Becca was determined to do all the applications herself. People would ask me "Where did she apply?" and I had to admit I didn't know. I asked her to apply to at least one California school but she decided not to.
The envelopes started arriving last week. First was an acceptance to a Switzerland school... Yikes! That's too far. Now I began to hope for anything on this continent. Two more letters - yay! she got in at a school in NY and one in Boston. Now she was relieved that she had more options.
I asked her what her top choices were but she said she didn't want to choose, for fear of being disappointed later. So another envelope arrived. Chicago. That was the back up school and she got in there. Good news.
Today another NY school - congratulations. This one tricked us, because you get the "fat" envelope if you're accepted, but this particular school sent the acceptance in a regular business envelope. Very funny. Her dad left a message that the mail had come figuring she couldn't wait to get home to hear the news. And since she was driving (no cell phone use allowed while driving) she had her friend get the news from us on the cell phone. They were screaming with joy in the car, so I take it that was a good one.
Two more school to hear from (which I think are her top choices, even if she won't admit it.) Then we can start planning her going away.
She is really amazing, doing all this on her own.
I am going to miss her a lot. Ugh!
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
monrein
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Might as well smile

« Reply #1 on: March 28, 2009, 03:37:52 PM »

Of course you'll miss her and I bet she'll miss all of you too but what a great experience.  I bet you're proud of her and most importantly of all I hope she's proud of herself on so many different levels...independence, initiative, and the good grades to be accepted to so many schools.
 :cuddle;

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willieandwinnie
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« Reply #2 on: March 28, 2009, 03:52:06 PM »

 :grouphug; okarol, That is so great for Becca. I can read the mothering in your words, hard to let them grow up isn't it? You have done a wonderful job and Becca will continue to do wonderful.  :cuddle;
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David13
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« Reply #3 on: March 28, 2009, 03:55:26 PM »

Transitions are always difficult, but your daughter seems as though she has a very good head on her shoulders.

Switzerland?  How many languages does she speak?
« Last Edit: March 28, 2009, 04:32:25 PM by David13 » Logged

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kitkatz
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« Reply #4 on: March 28, 2009, 04:16:01 PM »

Senior year is always interesting for the kids.  Good for her she is getting accepted to many places. Switzerland would be an interesting place to have school.  Good luck Becca.
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Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
Chris
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« Reply #5 on: March 28, 2009, 04:26:14 PM »

If I remember right, Jenna wanted to go to NY to. If so, and they are close, have them both go there and help you save some money with living expenses. The old saying comes to mind "Kill 2 birds with one stone" except this pertains to finances. ;D
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pelagia
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« Reply #6 on: March 29, 2009, 07:31:24 AM »

 :thumbup; sounds like you have an independent, smart, determined daughter.  :2thumbsup;
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
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« Reply #7 on: March 29, 2009, 07:34:17 AM »

okarol   how lucky are you   you will still have one left at home   :bandance;
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Wattle
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« Reply #8 on: March 30, 2009, 12:00:22 AM »

 :cuddle;  Oh Karol I know you will really miss Becca. What is she thinking Switzerland..... geezzze!

She has the determination to succeed at what ever course she chooses. Thanks to her great parents she is independent and adventurous. Give yourself a pat on the back!


 :cheer: GO   :cheer:  B   :cheer:  E   :cheer:  C   :cheer:  C   :cheer:  A   :cheer:  GO   :cheer:



« Last Edit: March 30, 2009, 04:46:20 AM by Wattle » Logged

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Sunny
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Sunny

« Reply #9 on: March 30, 2009, 12:29:42 AM »

This is exciting news and I'm right there with you on this one. My 18 year old daughter has been receiving her acceptance notices too this month. She will attend school in California(where we live) or Seattle. Either way, I'm going to miss my darling little girl, just as I'm sure you will miss Becca.
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Sunny, 49 year old female
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pelagia
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« Reply #10 on: March 31, 2009, 05:41:06 AM »

How does anyone afford to send their son or daughter to an out of state school these days?  We pretty much insisted that our son go to school in Virginia.  Of course, we are blessed with great schools here and we had taken advantage of Virginia's prepaid tuition plan. They work it out so that by the time he enrolled, we had saved enough to pay his tuition and fees.  We even got a little money back since he did not go to the most expensive state school. That was a good thing since it turns out that the first year of college and my husband's year off from work coincided.  My sister spent almost $200k sending her two kids to college after the scholarships.  whew...
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #11 on: March 31, 2009, 12:48:32 PM »


Good question - I wanted her to stay in California but the competition is fierce here for state schools. Becca really loved the idea of going east, and since her dad went to MIT and a life-long student, he is supportive of sending her wherever she wants to go (she's the first one of our kids who really embraces academics so he is encouraging her.)

I have always said we are such old parents that we'd be paying our kids student loans with our social security checks - and that looks exactly like what will happen (since my hubby became disabled.)
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
pelagia
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« Reply #12 on: March 31, 2009, 06:32:18 PM »


I have always said we are such old parents that we'd be paying our kids student loans with our social security checks

I know that reality! 
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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
Slywalker
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« Reply #13 on: April 01, 2009, 05:11:14 AM »

Congratulations to Becca.  When my daughter was applying for college she would not apply for a school in our State (and to tell the truth our instate university was 5K more expensive than the Maine school she ended up attending).  She moved to Maine and never moved home - stayed there after her first year, found an apartment and settled there.  (My son, 8 years before my daughter did the same thing only he started with a DC school).  I guess that is good news as they were raised to be independent and productive members of society.

Okarol - your daughter will do great no matter where she ends up.  Best of luck to her in just making a decision.

Sandyb

 :bunny:

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okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #14 on: April 01, 2009, 09:38:07 AM »


Thanks - yes - she will do fine - it's mom who is a wimp.
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
rookiegirl
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« Reply #15 on: April 01, 2009, 11:48:48 AM »

Okarol,

I remember last Fall when my oldest daughter (Mia) went off to UNC-Chapel Hill.  I was a nervous wreck for months.  It was so hard to let go even though she is only 25 minutes away from home.  I really had to work hard on letting go and pray that what my husband and I have thought her she will remember.

I was so scared to leave her on her own.  But the funny thing was for at least 2 months she came home every weekend.  I think she missed us than she realized.  She is now in her second semester and I can't believe she will be a Sophomore next Fall.

By the way, congratulations to Becca and especially to you and your husband to have raised a wonderful, intellectual young lady.

~RG
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2000-Diagnosed IGA Nephropathy
2002-1st biopsy (complications)
2004-2nd biopsy
10/03/07-Tenckhoff Catheter Placement
10/22/07-Started Peritoneal Dialysis
03/2008-Transplant team meeting
04/2008-Transplant workup
05/2008-Active Transplant list
3/20/09-Cadaver Kidney Transplant
4/07/09-Tenckhoff Catheter removed
4/20/09-New kidney biopsy
kitkatz
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« Reply #16 on: April 01, 2009, 04:20:06 PM »

I cannot believe my daughters have been out of the house FOUR years already!
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #17 on: August 10, 2009, 11:19:59 PM »

I went with Becca to New York over the weekend. We had a long drive up to the campus and spent the night at a B&B. The next day we went to Target and bought more things she needed. She checked in at the admissions office and at her dorm. I helped her unpack a little before she had to go to a welcome dinner. The next day I came back and took her to lunch before I was driving back to JFK. I tried to be tough but it was so hard. I will miss her terribly. She said "Thank you for everything Mom. I had a great childhood." I don't think she meant it to sound so final, but it makes you realize that life is forever changed.
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
David13
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A meow massages the heart.

« Reply #18 on: August 11, 2009, 03:38:42 AM »

 :cuddle;
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paris
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« Reply #19 on: August 11, 2009, 08:20:34 AM »

 :cuddle;   The house will seem empty and I know how much you will miss the day to day contact with Becca.  You have done a wonderful job at parenting.   :cuddle;
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kitkatz
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« Reply #20 on: August 11, 2009, 02:44:02 PM »

You can be in contact with her via email and Facebook daily. Maria and I are in contact regularly. It is quite a change in your life.
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lifenotonthelist.com

Ivanova: "Old Egyptian blessing: May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places you must walk." Babylon 5

Remember your present situation is not your final destination.

Take it one day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time.

"If we don't find a way out of this soon, I'm gonna lose it. Lose it... It means go crazy, nuts, insane, bonzo, no longer in possession of ones faculties, three fries short of a Happy Meal, wacko!" Jack O'Neill - SG-1
okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #21 on: August 11, 2009, 02:58:23 PM »

Yes thank God for the internet!
I am going to buy a bunch of postcards to send her for the next couple of weeks.
Maybe I will ask family and friends to send some too - she has a little mailbox on campus so she might like that.
 :)
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
okarol
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Photo is Jenna - after Disneyland - 1988

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« Reply #22 on: August 14, 2009, 10:08:39 PM »

Becca in her dorm last Sunday
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Admin for IHateDialysis 2008 - 2014, retired.
Jenna is our daughter, bad bladder damaged her kidneys.
Was on in-center hemodialysis 2003-2007.
7 yr transplant lost due to rejection.
She did PD Sept. 2013 - July 2017
Found a swap living donor using social media, friends, family.
New kidney in a paired donation swap July 26, 2017.
Her story ---> https://www.facebook.com/WantedKidneyDonor
Please watch her video: http://youtu.be/D9ZuVJ_s80Y
Living Donors Rock! http://www.livingdonorsonline.org -
News video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-7KvgQDWpU
rookiegirl
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« Reply #23 on: August 19, 2009, 05:58:46 PM »

Great pic of her dorm.
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2000-Diagnosed IGA Nephropathy
2002-1st biopsy (complications)
2004-2nd biopsy
10/03/07-Tenckhoff Catheter Placement
10/22/07-Started Peritoneal Dialysis
03/2008-Transplant team meeting
04/2008-Transplant workup
05/2008-Active Transplant list
3/20/09-Cadaver Kidney Transplant
4/07/09-Tenckhoff Catheter removed
4/20/09-New kidney biopsy
pelagia
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« Reply #24 on: August 19, 2009, 07:05:41 PM »

Are there differences between sons and daughters?  My son would not tolerate any fussing by me when we dropped him off at school last year.  And I'm not sure I would talk to him at all during the school year if I had to wait for him to call me.  He has a very strong streak of independence.

Your daughter looks really sweet Karol.  Sure brings back memories.  I think I had that exact same desk when I was in college.

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As for me, I'll borrow this thought: "Having never experienced kidney disease, I had no idea how crucial kidney function is to the rest of the body." - KD
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