New Words

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked
readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding,
subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here
are this year's winners.
Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one
letter
altered from a real word. Some are terrifically innovative:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts
until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people, that
stops bright ideas from penetrating. The Bozone layer, unfortunately,
showslittle sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders
the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and
the person who doesn't get it.

7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running
late.

8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra
credit.)

10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all
these really bad vibes, right? And then like, the Earth explodes and
it's like, a serious bummer.

11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the
day consuming only things that are good for you.

12. Glibido: All talk and no action

13. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
when they come at you rapidly-or when you're drunk.

14. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just
after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets
into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out

16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a
worm in the fruit you're eating.

17. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.