Thanks for making me feel welcome

[KATIEJAYNE2003]

Hi Guys, thanks so much for your replies, it really does help knowing that im not the only one out there that feels the way i do, I do get really angry a lot of the time, and ive had a very loving relationship break down because of the illness which makes me resent it, and its treatment even more. I had to be persuaded to actually go back on to dialysis in the first place as i thought i would be better off not here that going through the misery of daily dialysis. I did finally agree, but due to various problems with my dialysis (latest being that my fistula isnt working properly) it is a constant uphill struggle. There are many days where I dont feel I can cope, and for the benefit of everyone around me I feel sometimes that they would be better off if i was no longer here. Im quite lucky that i still work, but only because i dont want this thing to take any more control oevr my life than it already has, i feel i have major control issues, which, ive been told is very common in patients with Kidney Failure - Guess we are a weird breed then lol. One thing i would like to know is why me? I know it sounds like a really dumb ass question to be asking but, there is no history of kidney disease anywhere in my family - like even going back hundereds and hundereds of years. I had dysplastic Kidneys? is anyone elses ESRF caused by this, if so what is it and why does it happen, in my fight to gain control over my illness i really think it would help if i knew the whys and whens

Thanks again for listening - you understand better than anybody xxxx
 

[boxman55]

Hi KATEJAYNE2003, I moved your post here so more members will see it sooner and help you with your questions. Please hang in there it does get better. Sometimes not a lot but at least a little...Boxman

[willieandwinnie]

katiejayne, boxman is right, it will get easier and we are always here to listen to you rant if you need to. We are family.

[paris]

Katiejayne, that is why we are here--to help make things easier. A burden is lighter when shared by many, so lean on us.    I have no kidney history in my family either.  Idopathic FSGS--- no known reason.  I don't know if it helps to have a history or to know why.  Maybe others can answer that question for both of us.   Keep posting. 









fsgs

[devon]

I like to think of it this way... it doesn't get easier, we just get better at dealing with it!

-Devon